DSS and disgusting habit

[TheSpottedDog]

DSS (22) has a habit of performance farting. I hate farting at the best of times but he literally walks around cocking his leg and farting, squatting and farting, bending over and sticking his bum out to fart, star jumping and farting, legs akimbo on the sofa farting ... it fucking irritates me. When DH and I first got together he used to laugh at him (he was 15 then) and I spoke with him and told him it really bothered me and I find it disrespectful. We had an argument over it but eventually he saw my point and would ask him to stop when he did it. He toned it down for a while but then started it up again. Whenever he comes over I just end up going upstairs to get away from him because it winds me up so much.
The only good thing about lockdown is that he hasn’t been coming over on Saturday nights and I’m absolutely dreading the return of this shit.

AIBU to tell DH that his son is almost 23 years old now and if he can’t stop himself acting like a young child I’d rather him not come over?

Laughing so much at the uptight and OTT comments on this thread.

Looks like people voting YABU are too scared to comment in case they get lynched by the angry mob of mumsnet miseries.

I voted YABU because it looks like a lot of fuss about nothing much.

@livefornaps

I would ask him in a concerned way, "oh, did you have some serious hormonal problems as a teenager? It seems that you haven't completed puberty. No wonder no girl wants to go anywhere near that pathetic mushroom-stump excuse for a cock. I read that performative farting is a classic way of consoling yourself for having such a tiny penis"

Is that what you’d say to your stepson? Gosh. I think your problems are are far more profound than that of a silly lad making a show of farting.

You probably pride yourself on being withering or some shit...but frankly, that seems spiteful, inappropriate and dare I say, a little disturbed. If you spoke to my young adult son like that, you’d never set foot in my home again.

Rosababy - is that you ex-BIL?

This thread is brilliant btw. Purest Mumsnet.

If only there was someone the OP could report him to.

he literally walks around cocking his leg and farting, squatting and farting, bending over and sticking his bum out to fart, star jumping and farting, legs akimbo on the sofa farting
😂
OK, I’ll admit I have a puerile sense of humour at times but I can’t help laughing at this, although I suspect it would get boring after a few performances. As long as they don’t stink, and he didn’t do it in public, it wouldn’t bother me.

This thread is making ME want to star jump and fart
Me too, @pictish! I’ve been looking for a fun home workout and this might be it 😆😏

Oh I really enjoyed this thread! Thank you 🤣

(And yes it’s hideous)

He's gonna be a pain to you forever as he will never have a relationship with this kind of behaviour

The description is hilarious though.

The boots situation got me as well

Has he got some form of special needs? My ds finds his own farts hysterical whereas his sister will trump and keep a straight face and carry on with what she is doing (absolutely doesn't acknowledge it). We just don't react, they are 3 and 4 years old and am certain that ds will not be so easily amused as he gets older.

The bigger concern is that at 22 he is still very childlike, if no additional needs then he needs to start growing up. In order to do that your dh and his ex probably need to stop babying him!

@KarensChoppyBob

Rosababy - is that you ex-BIL?

If your ex BIL was a toilet humour loving female then quite possibly

It's a horrible habit, is it actually possible to do virtually non stop farting, when you eat normal meals, as in fart to order. He needs to go on Britain's got talent, and put on a fart show. In fact there was a man on there once, who did farting tricks.! Your step son needs to bung up, and not let in the house.

You never know .

@CheesePleaz

Am I the only one that finds the OP's description of a man star jumping, scissor kicking and pirouetting his way around the house with a steady stream of musical parps slightly funny?

Was I the only South Park fan in the late 1990s?

No, @CheesePleaz, I've been chuckling to myself too.

I would describe this as common and a sign of a lax upbringing, which is half your husband's fault.

Honestly this wouldn't happen in my social circles unless the son had special needs, in which case we'd obviously be very understanding.

I think your husband's reaction is everything. If he laughs or ignores it I'd find it hard to respect him tbh. If he made it clear that he thought this was very silly, unacceptable behaviour that's different.

If you wish to help you could have a serious chat with him and ask him why he still thinks this is funny at 22, point out what you tolerated with gritted teeth at 15 is different now he's well in to adulthood. If he wants attention or needs you to think he's funny in some way then maybe address that.

Think it's how you treat him, if you're very positive with him when he behaves his age, says intelligent things, makes adult appropriate jokes etc, when he's helpful etc but treat him like a silly little boy when he does the farts then maybe he'll get the message.

But unfortunately he has his parents to thank for the fact he thinks this is socially acceptable.

Seeing someone slip on a banana skin is funny.

Slipping on a banana skin yourself is not funny.

Which is why it's OK to find the descriptions funny, but you also have to accept that it isn't to the OP.

Time for another chat with DH, OP. If DH won't back you up, that's a different issue.

Exactly. If it was happening consistently in your home, it would soon lose any humour.

@Sceptre86

Has he got some form of special needs? My ds finds his own farts hysterical whereas his sister will trump and keep a straight face and carry on with what she is doing (absolutely doesn't acknowledge it). We just don't react, they are 3 and 4 years old and am certain that ds will not be so easily amused as he gets older.

The bigger concern is that at 22 he is still very childlike, if no additional needs then he needs to start growing up. In order to do that your dh and his ex probably need to stop babying him!

Let's not go there.

@ItsDinah

It is a fetish and it would creep me out. I would not be under the same roof as a man who did this.

I thought that, or at least trying some weird aggressive thing over women.

Very very weird.

All you need to do is film it and then threaten to show the footage to any prospective/new partners.

Aw I liked old DOI. Mind Dan whitton. Mind the time Jason told Kare she did fuck all.

I hope the judges are watching this feeling royally guilty that they didn't ticket DVO.

I read this as him being 2, not 22.

No advice really but he really should have grown out of this gross habit by now! Does he take inspiration from Terence and Philip from South Park by any chance...

@IEat

Think I’m on my own I find it hilarious. My Stepdad used to walk and fart so funny. Miss that now he’s died.

I also thought it was hilarious. My family are quite farty, no one's really bothered by it.

I can't believe 15% think YABU.

@Wheresmykimchi

I hope the judges are watching this feeling royally guilty that they didn't ticket DVO.

Oh apologies.

Wrong thread, obv