DSS and disgusting habit

[TheSpottedDog]

DSS (22) has a habit of performance farting. I hate farting at the best of times but he literally walks around cocking his leg and farting, squatting and farting, bending over and sticking his bum out to fart, star jumping and farting, legs akimbo on the sofa farting ... it fucking irritates me. When DH and I first got together he used to laugh at him (he was 15 then) and I spoke with him and told him it really bothered me and I find it disrespectful. We had an argument over it but eventually he saw my point and would ask him to stop when he did it. He toned it down for a while but then started it up again. Whenever he comes over I just end up going upstairs to get away from him because it winds me up so much.
The only good thing about lockdown is that he hasn’t been coming over on Saturday nights and I’m absolutely dreading the return of this shit.

AIBU to tell DH that his son is almost 23 years old now and if he can’t stop himself acting like a young child I’d rather him not come over?

What a chav.

That's disgusting.

My cousin used to do this until he released a little too much and shat his pants. He stopped after that....!

OP, should consider putting some laxatives into his food. Please do it. That will teach him.

Gosh I was all ready to tell you YABU, but he's 23 YADNBU

YANBU and 16% think this behaviour is acceptable?

Squirt him with a water pistol, as if he were an errant animal.

Is he otherwise OK? He has a rather degenerative behaviour for his age.

@CuriousaboutSamphire

Why not Freddie?

Why can't she tell an adult to leave her home for being disgusting?

I've kicked BIL out for less.

I'm not modifying my behaviour in my own home because someone chooses to act in such a stupid and immature manner.

Nor would I choose to remedy it by making my DH feel uncomfortable until he did as I thought he should.

I'd discuss it with DH and deal with it as and when it happened.

DH would similarly choose how he would react and we'd go from there!

Because I think it’s on her husband to do it. Its his son, it’s disgusting behaviour. He should parent his adult child. It’s clearly distressing op, I would find it distressing too. But the dh’s lack of concern for his wife would piss me off even more. It’s not normal behaviour, and it’s not normal for a father to have a word.

At the end of the day it may well go down on history as op’s the wicked stepmum, stopping the dh from seeing his child. Step parents are always the easy target.

Op has made it clear she doesn’t like it. Where is the respect from her dh?

I wonder if there were other people in the house visiting whether dh would say something then?

Think I’m on my own I find it hilarious. My Stepdad used to walk and fart so funny. Miss that now he’s died.

I'd assumed OP had given up on her DH, @Freddiefox

I wouldn't be reliant on mine to police his family. We've been through to much for that! I know when he feels helpless and am more than happy to step in... as he does for me!

So I may be projecting a bit

To be honest I’d probably try not to rise to this and just ignore it. Generally when you ignore attention seeking behaviour it stops

Though I have to admit the star jump fart would probably have made me laugh the first time. 😂

Is he doing it because he's immature or because he knows he's annoying you.

How you deal with it really depends on how you deal with it.

If it's the first then he has significant difficulties with his social development because that is acting like a 12 year old or younger.

If it's the later then he's not nice and your husband is enabling him. You have in MN speak a husband and a SS problem.

Squirt him with a water pistol, as if he were an errant animal.

Please do this.

How you deal with it depends on which one it is *

Oh this thread has cheered me right up. The image of a grown man star-jump--farting and discussion of arse trumpets being allowed to blare has lifted me out of my winter Covid slump.

I'm sorry you have to actually live with it OP, but I thank you for sharing it!

I'd be mulling over an air horn and an air freshener, a really cheap one. Let off the air horn whilst he does it. And as he leaves cover him in a disgusting air freshener.

Urgh how unattractive and puerile. Who is his audience? I doubt he does this at work, for example, so why does he continue to do it at your house? Does your husband laugh, and therefore encourage it? I couldn't put up with such immature behaviour from an adult. It wearing and tedious and just ridiculous.
I hope he shits himself one day to be honest.

God my ex was like this. He still is as far as I know. He's 43 years old.
He doesn't do the star jumping, but all the rest is just the same.

I used to just tell him he was disgusting and I didn't find it funny, but he never stopped. Farts are LITERALLY the only thing he laughs at. Literally. I lived with him for 11 years (don't ask me why) and he didn't laugh at a single thing unrelated to farts in that entire time. He told me that he never has. It's so weird.

When he comes over put Dulcolax tablet in his food - after the first time he will be too scared to fart after dealing with the follow through.

Disgusting pea brained Neanderthal.

I would be telling dh a man who condones such a childish habit isn't sexually attractive.

Get them bunk beds and you have the bedroom to yourself op.

My ex BIL did this, a man nearing 50. It actually made me heave, while the 'family' laughed.

God, that's one more brilliant thing about being divorced. Should make a gratitude list really :)

Reminds me of that Viz character Johnny Fartpants.

I thought you were going to write he was six years old, it is disgusting and he would not be stepping foot across the threshold.

What a weird man, so what does his father say! I wouldn’t have the idiot in my house,

My 13 and 11yo DSS's grew out of this years ago wtaf!

His dad need sto stop enabling it.

He can't get out of his boots? Oh dear guess you're stuck in them

OP he’s a grown man. Tell him to stop being so fucking gross and to grow up. You don’t need his dads permission to do that. If he sulks tough.