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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have lost all motivation for anything

625 replies

Pleidiolwyfimgwlad · 18/01/2021 17:30

Is the endlessness of lockdown getting to anyone else? I seem to have lost all motivation for tidying the house, cooking, homeschooling, my job - all of it.

Me & the kids walk every day but that’s about it - it’s the relentlessness of it all that’s really getting to me I think. I just want to sit about eating toast & sleeping- I’d take to my bed if I didn’t have kids to look after.

I have quite a big job at a uni too and even the thought of it makes me feel depressed. It’s awful- I am fed up of my colleagues and they are lovely people so I feel bad.

Aibu to have just lost all mojo? I don’t think I am depressed- just OVER it all- I don’t even know what I need at the moment!

OP posts:
effiehabb · 18/01/2021 21:19

Same here :(

pinkprosseco · 18/01/2021 21:37

I feel your pain. I started a new much wanted job a week into lockdown (interviewed for before Covid was a thing, had a three month notice period). It was all go but now I've run into a wall. I can't keep going and feel like I'm failing.

roarfeckingroarr · 18/01/2021 21:39

Same.

First lockdown I was pregnant and worked through. I actually enjoyed it.

This time I actually can't. I meet up with friends most days (one at a time) for a walk with my baby. Not working because I'm on mat leave.

I get up and shower obviously every day but just putting on another pair of leggings or skinny jeans and a jumper makes it a struggle to be arsed.

It's shit and we'll have massive tax rises to pay for it all next year.

Mrsbclinton · 18/01/2021 21:43

Im feeling so fed up with everything & everyone.

Trying to homeschool 3 dcs whilst working part time is really stretching me to the limit!

Myself and DH are bickering and getting annoyed with each other over silly things.

I am starting to feel like the walls are closing in around me. Im so glad I have my job as I get out of the house and see other faces.

Last lockdown was so much more manageable as the weather was ok & we didnt know how long all these covid restrictions would last.........

carlywurly · 18/01/2021 21:56

This was me last week. I'm normally cheerful and optimistic by nature but I felt wretched and joyless. I was really pining for my old life.

I've imposed a bit of a routine on myself - exercise, reading, studying, decorating, clearing out and am seeing the benefits so have perked up. For now anyway. One of the hardest things about all this is the total rollercoaster of emotions.

Jellington · 18/01/2021 21:59

Same. I have to force myself to do anything. The weather isn't helping I don't think. It was very different in the summer. Now with a 4 yo and a 9 mo, pregnant with morning sickness, at home all day every day, it's getting to me. Every day is the same or at best a small variation. I know we're lucky, but goodness it's getting to me now.

Solasum · 18/01/2021 22:08

I am very sorry to read so many people are struggling. I am too. And like others no one else I know seems to be. They seem to be relentlessly cheerful and I just don’t understand how any more.

I can feel myself slipping. My DS is being absolutely angelic about leaving me to work, but I am increasingly resentful about work as the fun bits of the job are basically gone until all this is over, and instead it is endless grunt work interspersed with Personalities. During the day I have breaks to make meals and to switch on calls/classes and when I finish it is dark and miserable and we haven’t been out for yet another day, so I feel obliged to drag us out to walk in the dark.

I remember early on in the pandemic people were saying we have it much better than in the war, but at this point I genuinely don’t believe that anymore. Sure, your menfolk might have been away, and it was Scary, but at least everyone could actually support each other, and there was still life going on. This nothingness is so awful. I have aged years in just months and I have become shouty and I am constantly knackered.

Ringsender2 · 18/01/2021 22:12

I'm the 207th person to vote. Hilariously unanimous! And who's the person who pressed the wrong button by accident?!

Today was the worst day of the year OP, so it's all going to improve from here. Honest! Wink

tsmainsqueeze · 18/01/2021 22:14

Today i tried to remember the last time i really , proper laughed , and i can't remember.
I am sick of home, even though its comfy and warm and has space .
I am sick of work , even though its nice , with lovely colleagues .
I just can't be bothered , i would rather stay in my bed and alternate between reading and sleeping until its over , rather than this life with all the joy sucked out of it.

asquirrel · 18/01/2021 22:24

@Ringsender2

I'm the 207th person to vote. Hilariously unanimous! And who's the person who pressed the wrong button by accident?!

Today was the worst day of the year OP, so it's all going to improve from here. Honest! Wink

the 1% / wrong button presser is one of those perky bastards who needs to give me whatever they're on
Caspah · 18/01/2021 22:24

No point planning things to look forward to (I wish there was) when we have no idea when, or if, we'll be able to do these things again. At some point we'll be so ground down that this Government will be able to offer us any little bonus and we'll go along with anything they're doing.

On the positive side, for me; I'm really looking forward to 20 January and watching the US inaugaration. I just hope it's a celebration and nothing horrible happens.

wizzbangfizz · 18/01/2021 22:29

The thing is there is so much I could be doing with this time, but no my only aim seemingly is to get fat. I drag myself through the motions of home schooling and work before slumping on sofa feeling guilty about other stuff I could be doing. I honestly feel like screaming when I have to think of yet another meal to ducking cook!

Turquoisesea · 18/01/2021 22:30

I’m the same, just cannot be bothered to do anything even though my house is a tip and have plenty of (boring) stuff to do. Just sick of the routine of it all, the homeschooling, the meals, the mess. I’m normally quite cheerful but have definitely hit a walk with it all this week. And I can’t stop eating rubbish too & dry January lasted till approximately the 4th Jan.

SpicyTool75 · 18/01/2021 22:31

I finished the internet today Grin

LemonSherbetFancies · 18/01/2021 22:33

Really missing family and friends. Can't wait for it all to come back and it will, just in about 2 months or so then life will resume as it was for the most part.

CoronaIsWatching · 18/01/2021 22:35

I'm finding it easier this time round than the first one. I work from home so I've made my flat the perfect nest to hibernate in. Makes it easier when the weathers so awful outside. You don't need to go for a walk, you can just stay in bed eating chocs, that's what I do. And I'm doing Dry January.

winetime89 · 18/01/2021 22:37

I'm the same.coped so well last year, but once all the tiers came in and we didn't dare go anywhere and our Christmas plans for the kids got cancelled I've just felt worse and worse and less and less motivation for anything. I just can't be arsed any more.

U2HasTheEdge · 18/01/2021 22:38

Same here.

Last lockdown I managed ok. Prob because I was still doing enough face to face appointments to add some difference to my days and seeing colleagues in my office. I did go into the office today, but we have to be in separate rooms and that felt even more depressing than staying at home to be honest.

Every day is the same. I am not sleeping well at all. I even made myself a list of things I need to do every day to help, but can't even be bothered to look at it now. I just feel a bit flat and unmotivated. Its like fucking groundhog day. I hate January at the best of times, but this isn't a life, it is just grind.

Mreggsworth · 18/01/2021 22:43

I'm the same.

Also don't think I'm depressed.. My mood is pretty stable and I don't feel low, I just feel exceptionally lazy and that everything is a massive ball ache.

heatered · 18/01/2021 22:59

Tbh I've had zero motivation since way before lockdown. I'm in awe of those people who work, have tidy homes, clean clothes and hair, aren't the size of a rugby player and have happy children and relationships. I've been a SAHM for way to long. I'm terrified of getting a job for fear I wouldn't cope. I've been seriously put down over the years and bullied. It's all taken it's toll. I don't cope being at home. I don't cope anywhere. Committing myself to something makes me feel dread and panic. I have had treatment for anxiety and depression in the past, little things can trigger me for days/weeks. I honestly can't see a way out of my hopelessness. I'm such a waste of space. So for me lockdown whether it be the first one or one hundredth one has made very little difference to my wasteful life.

squishedblueberry · 18/01/2021 23:02

Same
I’m irritable and nothing seems to bring me joy
I have nothing to say
I’m sick of video calls and feel like I have forgotten how to socialise
I miss life

crackofdoom · 18/01/2021 23:02

Yeah.....I've been beating myself up so much because since November all I've wanted to do in the evenings is watch TV or go on MN... I'm sure I remember a time when I'd be be messaging clients or doing sketches for work- I'd even wonder how people had time to watch TV in the evenings!

Last year was going to be the year that, with DS2 starting school, was going to see me throwing my all into my business and getting it on a proper footing. I know I could be doing some of the business building, website tinkering stuff while I'm at home, but magically....I'm just not.

Even simple day to day admin- the stuff that keeps the threatening letters and the red bills from coming through the letter box- has become a struggle to keep up with. I even got a small business grant, and it has taken me months to work up to spending any of it- I can't even spend money!

Mind you, I had a Zoom meeting with my small business support person the other day, and she said she was surprised I hadn't cancelled, as 2 thirds of her clients had, so at least I know I'm not alone Sad

grassisjeweled · 18/01/2021 23:03

I don't feel too bad at the moment but the weather is lovely and sunny where we are. Makes a massive difference to my mental health

OverTheRubicon · 18/01/2021 23:03

@CoronaIsWatching

I'm finding it easier this time round than the first one. I work from home so I've made my flat the perfect nest to hibernate in. Makes it easier when the weathers so awful outside. You don't need to go for a walk, you can just stay in bed eating chocs, that's what I do. And I'm doing Dry January.
You do need to go for a walk when you have young children though. You also don't get to lie in bed eating chocs. Nor can everyone make their living place a perfect nest. I remember you on another thread, having a go at people having the temerity to drive a short way to beauty spots... this situation not the same for everyone.
middleager · 18/01/2021 23:04

Me too.

No motivation for work or appearance. Fed up of having to fake happiness in front of kids, cooking meals, tidying.

Mine are teens and now spend hours in front of screens, something I've always tried hard to keep an eye on.

The only thing that gets 100% attention is my stomach and the remote.

Not sleeping, taken to meds and can't even think about my teenagers' final years at school and future as it's too depressing.

And then I feel guilty about letting it all slip.

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