To think this woman was just being a dick/trying to make things hard for people who are distancing?

[thepeopleversuswork]

In a small, dirty and pretty crowded corner shop with my DD. We're in SE London in one of the areas with highest case rates. I am trying as far as possible to avoid going out at all beyond walks in the park and this is the first time I've been in a shop for 10 days so I'm a bit jumpy about it and trying to get in and out as fast and safely as possible.

Shop is crowded, people queueing near the till, not distanced at all, a couple of kids not wearing masks. There was a gaggle of three late middle-aged women chatting next to the till, making it difficult to distance by the till (and thus pretty unsafe for the person serving as there was a very insufficient screen) and blocking the exit out of the shop.

I pointedly - maybe being a bit OTT -- waited as far back from the front of the queue as I could before paying which I would have thought signalled that I was taking distancing pretty seriously and wanted to be given a wide berth.

After I paid and walked towards the shop exit, trying to swerve the women gossiping by the door, a 2p piece escaped from my purse because it hadn't been zipped up properly. One of the women huddling by the till picked it up: I was just on my way towards the door and she started walking towards me to give me the 2p back. I said: "don't worry about it, just put it in the charity box" and indicated I was on my way out and that I was more interested in preserving the distance. She moved right in close towards me and I said: "no I'm distancing, can you just keep it or put in the charity box please?". She comes right up to me and sticks the bloody 2p piece in my coat pocket with her grimy hand and pats my pocket. I looked visibly irritated and walked off and I heard her say "calm down, love, I was doing you a favour," as I was walking out of the door.

I turned around and said loudly (so the rest of the people massing by the till could hear" "Sorry but I'm not prepared to risk catching COVID for the sake of a 2 pence piece. I did make this pretty clear but if you can't understand that then perhaps you shouldn't be going out at all and certainly not hanging about by the till."

I heard her shouting: "stuck up cow" out of the doorway as I walked off.

Maybe I was a bit of an arse but this is exactly how COVID spreads. Totally unnecessary contact: people's attitude to saving small change in this country is so bonkers anyway: I know money is tight for a lot of people but who thinks that saving 2p is going to be worthwhile if you lose your job due to sickness?

I get that its easier for some people to distance than others and maybe she thought I was being precious but it really fucks me off when people impose their laissez faire attitude on others. It's one thing to just forget every now and then but I seriously think some people actually enjoy making those who taking it seriously feel uncomfortable...

[Eckhart]

I think you need to take a bit of responsibility here, OP. You voluntarily went into a small shop at a busy time because you hadn't been organised enough to have the basics in. You feel you communicated that you were observing social distancing rules by standing half a mile away and everyone looking at you ant thinking, 'oh, this lady is being very careful, we must respect her wishes'. You feel that everybody else should be doing perfectly, for your benefit.

If you don't want to be near dirty people in close proximity, don't go into a dirty shop when it's clearly full of them. Even if you couldn't go to another shop, you could have gone into this one earlier or later, or even just queued outside until it had a quiet moment.

If you're not perfectly observing the rules, why should they?

[JingsMahBucket]

Yes, @Wheresmykimchi you are bullying the OP.

[fassbendersmistress]

@formerbabe

I don't know why so many posters are being rude to the op. It's incredibly stupid behaviour to touch strangers at the moment like that.

I suspect it’s because instead of an AIBU about a lady accosting her after she’s paid at a till, to return money, put hand in picket etc...the OP delivered a preamble that put her in the starting role (covid hero) and set the scene with a heaving, dirty shop and middle aged gossips...I think the OP unnecessarily set herself up for judgement

[fassbendersmistress]

*starring role not starting role

[LickEmbysmiling]

So annoying, a bug bear of mine is having my temp taken, I don't mind that but the person leans in on me and starts talking!

[Wheresmykimchi]

[quote JingsMahBucket]@Wheresmykimchi
Do you think that referring to shops as dirty and a gaggle of middle aged woman gossiping sounds like normal speak?

Yes...? Why wouldn’t it be normal speak? If a shop’s dusty then it’s dusty and dirty. We all have corner shops like that or have been in one like that. That’s pretty normal. Same thing with describing the people standing around. I understand what you’re saying to an extent but if that’s what’s normal, then what’s wrong with describing it?[/quote]
I give up. I've made my point, and the pile on is approaching (not you ).

But it was unecessary, and I stand by that.

[thepeopleversuswork]

@Eckhart

I think you need to take a bit of responsibility here, OP. You voluntarily went into a small shop at a busy time because you hadn't been organised enough to have the basics in. You feel you communicated that you were observing social distancing rules by standing half a mile away and everyone looking at you ant thinking, 'oh, this lady is being very careful, we must respect her wishes'. You feel that everybody else should be doing perfectly, for your benefit.

If you don't want to be near dirty people in close proximity, don't go into a dirty shop when it's clearly full of them. Even if you couldn't go to another shop, you could have gone into this one earlier or later, or even just queued outside until it had a quiet moment.

If you're not perfectly observing the rules, why should they?

I've got online deliveries lined up from now until mid-February. But you can't always cover everything.

Everyone sometimes has to go to the shops for top-ups. I work FT (from home) and I can't always choose the perfect time to go to the shop, I have to find windows which fit into my work and my DD's schooling.

Also with respect there's a difference between "not perfectly observing the rules" and "being a raging COVIDIOT". Even in a totally perfect world people sometimes have to go outside their homes at the moment, particularly if they don't have any support inside the home. Not everyone has to barge up to strangers in the middle of a pandemic and press useless things on them just for shits and giggles.

[Lookingoutside]

She’s a rough, insecure mess (shouting, ‘stuck up cow’ 🙄) and couldn’t stand to do as you asked because she felt she was being told what to do. Idiot.

Hope you’re ok 💐

[Wheresmykimchi]

@Onjnmoeiejducwoapy a lot? Because I said based on the.wording of the post it sounded snobby? But OP can call woman grimy and a gaggle of middle aged gossipers and that's applauded? @JingsMahBucket, no, you jumping on the bandwagon when you were interacting with me perfectly fine and said you could see my point two mins ago is what you are accusing me of.

[Eckhart]

Not everyone has to barge up to strangers in the middle of a pandemic and press useless things on them just for shits and giggles

That's not really what happened. You just like a bit of drama.

But OK, you're 100% right and she was 100% wrong. That's all you want to hear, really, isn't it. YABU isn't an option.

[StepOutOfLine]

@DameFanny

"Like it's stupid to go into an overcrowded shop instead of standing outside till someone leaves."

WTF? Like you just start your own queue and expect people to not barge past and go in anyway?

No. Where I live, it's been the norm since, oh, last March, for people to wait outside smaller shops. It's also the norm in banks, the post office etc.
Thought it was normal in a pandemic tbh. Like there are people keeping you outside big supermarkets etc.
Haven't had problems with people bathing past tbh.

[StepOutOfLine]

Barging

[ThePlantsitter]

Haven't had problems with people bathing past tbh.

Do you live in SE London stepOutOfLine?

[StepOutOfLine]

Central.

[ThePlantsitter]

Right, so you don't then. Everywhere's different isn't it. Round here some shops have an orderly queue but it is almost always kept in order by a security guard, which corner shops are not doing.

[Esspee]

I have been shopping first thing to avoid busy periods. Perhaps you should do this in future.

[lljkk]

Bit precious of OP, OP pointlessly escalated tension.

My other admittedly unimportant tuppence is that I would assign pity not resentment to this person. They are putting themselves more at risk than anyone else with their inability to SD.

[thepeopleversuswork]

Eckhart

"That's not really what happened. You just like a bit of drama."

I do like a bit of drama as much as the next person on AIBU, guilty as charged.

But that pretty much is what happened. She walked up to me and put something into my pocket when I'd clearly signalled that I considered this dangerous. Not sure else you'd call that?

[AwaAnBileYerHeid]

She was being a dick. If someone makes a point that they are trying to distance then you respect that. End of. For all those trying to blame you for going to a crowded shop - nonsense. We should be able to pop to the shops and be somewhat safe. Shops would be safe if everyone would just adhere to guidance. Don't blame the victim, blame the people who are acting poorly.

[Eckhart]

I'd say she'd put something in your pocket. No barging, no pressing, no shits and giggles. Maybe 2p is really worth having for her, and she didn't want you to be without it. You don't have to be so unpleasant about it. And neither did she.

Didn't the shop have a sign on the door to say 'X amount of customers only'? It's very odd, that. I live right in the city centre and they all do. They risk their business if they don't at least have a sign up, even if they don't enforce it.

[Raaaaaaarr]

Yep she was an idiot. I would have been extremely pissed off. Actually I would have gone as far as telling her not to touch me. It's not right even in normal times to do that.

[GirlCrush]

nobody should be going in peoples pockets pandemic or not!!

especially women it seems! very 1950"s

"gaggle of 3 late middle aged women chatting at the till"
"women gossiping at the door
woman 'huddled' by the till

[ktp100]

It's a clear sign of government failings in getting across vital messages when so many people STILL don't get it.

Truly infuriating.