To feel too fat to run in daylight 😔

[Trulyatraditionalman]

Hi all. I'm 31 and on the wrong side of 15st, and am currently doing Couch to 5k whilst trying to make healthier choices in general. I just can't shake the idea that everyone is staring at me when I'm out and about, so I only go on runs in the dark! I'm absolutely terrified of being heckled (I was bullied for my weight at school). The problem is that I also feel unsafe out running in the dark, so it's a catch-22!

For someone very overweight, I actually feel like I have relatively good fitness levels and don't get puffed out on my runs until the very end. I absolutely love running and wish I didn't feel so self conscious.

Am I being totally unreasonable to feel like this?

YABU - People don't give two figs what size you are when you're running, just crack on whatever time of day
YANBU - It's understandable/I've had experience feeling the same way.

Feel free to give me a stern talking to!

I used to be the same so YADNBU! I was so self conscious and would make sure my route didn't go past any schools/shops/etc.

Then I realised I didn't notice/judge runners whizzing past me apart from "I like their leggings" or "wow, they're fast!". 99% of people will not even look twice at you and if anyone does heckle or judge, it's on them. Or just put your headphones in then you won't hear!

My husband is an elite runner, skinny as a whippet and fast as anything and he gets heckled more than me (overweight, slow, weird running facial expressions..!)

You're doing something so positive for yourself, please don't stop because of what's probably not going to happen. You got this! X

And yes to pp about Strava! It's helped me loads

I'm a reasonably decent runner. When I see an overweight runner - and honestly I very rarely clock what runners look like - all I think is "well done you". I'm pretty sure that's a common feeling amongst runners.
Getting out the door for a run can be a struggle sometimes, even for people who run frequently and love it, but when you have the additional fear that people will be judging you I think just getting out there is something to be very proud of.

You'll always get people who will judge, you just have to know in yourself that you are achieving something that they most likely never will. So I reckon forget them, run when you want and when you feel safe, don't let them hold you back.

It was hard to vote OP as both are correct! You are not unreasonable to feel this way but please go and crack on!

I started 2020 at 16stone. I started the C25k programme at that weight, and combined with calorie counting was 12stone by the end of June.

Honestly. No one once looked at me or said anything or judged. And I run in london where everyone seems to be super slim and fit!

You can absolutely do this and will love it.

Just go for it and stop worrying! And even if some loser heckles you, so what? My young teen DD (who is super slim and fit) has had things called out at her when out running and I have had to convince her not to let it worry her, and that sadly as a woman you are likely to get this kind of shit but that’s no reason to stop running.

I'm fat too. I have had a couple of comments while out running but do you know what I have noticed? They never come from anyone whose opinion I would ever seek out. And if I wouldn't value someone's opinion, I don't give a shit if they criticize me.

I've never had anything but supportive comments from another runner, a neighbour, other mums from DS's school, colleagues I've bumped into. If I've been shouted at it's been by someone clutching a can of special brew and getting overexcited because usually they only get to shout at pigeons, or driving past leaning out of a van window. I tend to assume something's happened to the driver's dog and he needed something else to drool, fart and make a noise in the cab.

No one will bat an eyelid but I understand the confidence issues. I am similar. Maybe go in the mornings as it’s getting light to ease your concern?

Every runner I see no matter what size I think 'good for them' while I sit on my arse eating rubbish 😬

I can understand where you're coming from but honestly the world is full of runners at the moment. I've been doing it since April and never had a comment. I actually feel less judged when running than I do normally, because I am clearly trying to do something about it. I think you should be brave and try it. Maybe first thing when it's light but not busy.

Please keep going and run at a time you feel safe. I was very self conscious at the start of Couch to 5k, even though I'm just a stone or so overweight. I can understand you feeling anxious because you have experience of being bullied, but I genuinely believe the majority of people don't pay more than fleeting attention to anyone running by. Before I started running, I was envious of everyone, whatever their shape or size, for having the determination to do something to benefit their health.

I finished Couch to 5k a few weeks ago and still run 3 times a week and absolutely love it. I hold my head up and, even though fitter, slimmer runners are bounding past me, I just feel so much better within myself and keep plodding on with my own little goals and achievements. I have a treadmill at home, because I was too embarrassed to contemplate running outdoors and it was so boring, it almost put me off running for life. Exercising outdoors is a fantastic buzz.

Honestly, you're doing brilliantly. I wish I'd started running at 31 (instead of 53!)

I love seeing people running, of all ages, all shapes and sizes, people looking after their health is a good thing especially now

By a time you feel safe, I mean - don't run in the dark!

I’ve just bought a treadmill, partly to dodge this but also because it’s always chucking down where I live so I can get some exercise in while homeschooling

Unfortunately there are horrible people in the works who I’m sure judge everyone for some silly reason or another.

But seriously stuff them. Go out for your run. What they think doesn’t matter in the slightest

I started running when I was very big, the only comment I ever got was from a lovely older lady who said ‘I wish I’d done it at your age, I just stayed fat forever’
Do it OP, so glad I did.

Hi OP! I started c25k when I was 15st 7. I’m now finishing it at 14st 3. Always run in daylight but I did meet someone who also started to run as an accountability partner.
No one (to my knowledge) has ever looked at me, said anything, done anything because of my size. To be honest I don’t think anyone cares!
Well done for starting!

I’m the same; I love running and am a good few stone overweight. I go off road and put headphones in and zone out from the world. Please don’t let any idiots who think it’s funny to call out put you off running; you are doing an amazing thing for your health.

I am a healthy weight and above average pace runner and still occasionally get heckled.... Because some people are dicks. Ignore!

Also if you are finding c25k too easy you can always skip ahead a bit...do weeks 3/5/7 etc instead of following to the letter so as to get to 4k faster

5k. Can't type

Although there are some dicks out there who enjoy heckling runners (regardless of size), the majority of people either don’t notice them (as there are many, many of us out there, of all shapes, sizes and abilities), of just feel admiration. Definitely get headphones, and just get out there! You have as much right to be there as anyone else!

To be honest I've nothing but admiration for anyone who can get up off the sofa and go out at the moment. Good luck with running

Some people will heckle any runner, regardless of size and speed, they are just twats. I find sunglasses really help so I can completely avoid any eye contact. Not quite so handy in winter or the dark though! Good luck, keep going, ignore the mean lazy bastards. Other runners will give you loads of respect for just getting out the door.

I trained a lady who was a size 22 (she's now a 14) to run, we had this in the beginning and even now she's a bit self conscious but everyone has been so supportive of her journey.

You can guarantee that the skinny people driving past you in theirs cars will think that they wish they could do what you're doing and those that can will understand your struggle and think well done, good on you. Those that are nasty, well they're just nasty and haven't grown up enough or experienced life as far as to get a different perspective on things.

Keep going. You're amazing. You're already achieving something that the majority of the population can't do. Xxxx

There is a woman near where I live started running about 6 months ago was quite big she has done amazing and I am in awe of him, wish I could ask her if she could help me

I'm the same OP and have just started running. I go around 5.30pm. The good thing about this time of year for us self-conscious runners is it gets dark so early. I know it's ridiculous and like most of the people on this thread, people will admire us but I don't want to be recognised. I wear all black plus a woolly hat pulled right down. Hopefully I am too scary for any potential predators!