Reasons to have children please

[Lookingforguidance]

Myself and DH both love children and have always wanted them but in the last few months he has been researching a lot about the global impact having them had on the environment and also the fact that there are millions of children in the world who don’t have families. He has now decided that having our own biological ones is unethical when we could adopt. I would love to have one and adopt one.
We’re both looking for reasons to justify having our own (not just for emotional/selfish reasons like to see your own genes passed down/ to experience pregnancy and childbirth/ because it makes you happy etc). I’m really searching for concrete evidence that will convince him we should have just one. Please help. Thank you

People have kids because they have a biological urge in most cases, assuming good access to education and birth control.

If you don't, you will look back when it's too late and regret not having children because you read some bollocks that someone else will come along and debunk in 20 years.
Have the children, raise them to be decent, ethical human beings. Have them because you want them and have immeasurable love to give them. Have them because it's a natural progression.
Have them because if you don't he'll run off with someone younger down the line to start his family

They can bring you things from the kitchen when they're old enough

You can go to legoland

So you want kids - you want your own biological child/children - and he is laying down the law and saying no. All of a sudden.

He’s moved the goalposts and is sabotaging the life you dearly want.

Leave him. It won’t work. You won’t forgive him. And I don’t blame you,

Because you could be creating someone to lead the next generation into helping right out wrongs?

My life will never be the same after having my DS, my stomach is absolutely ruined. However having him is the best decision I've ever made.

He's 15 months. Makes me laugh every day, gives me purpose, gives me a reason to be the best version of myself, his smile makes my day. I love watching him learn new things, he's a part of me and my husband.

Overall birth rates in the UK are declining so even with one birth child you will be part of a natural trend (ie one birth child doesn't replace two parents). Also, we will need the pension contributions of a new generation. And technology is improving all the time, which means cleaner products are being brought to market, so by the time your child is grown up, their carbon footprint will be smaller than ours is now.

Adoption is a calling some people have. I am not sure it's a question of 'oh we will just adopt instead of having our own' .... He needs to do tons more research before he commits to the adoption route.

You both sound very young. Wait until you’ve matured a bit.

Very good advise.

This is an insane way of thinking OP. Not having kids whereas you ‘desperately’ want kids, the both of you, and for environmental reasons honestly makes me wonder wtf is up with you and your partner. I also find it truly offensive to women who want children and can’t whether it’s because of their age or biological reasons.
Get a grip.
By the way, who’s going to work on solving our climate change issue if not our generation and next. Recycle and reduce your carbon print, that’s a more sane way to see and experiment the world.

It's tricky to adopt. Very invasive procedures to get approval. It can take years and you will have ss playing mind games with you and basically tearing your life to pieces. Also most children to be adopted are older and have experienced neglect, abuse etc

Because the earth will explode one day and the opportunity to experience life (especially if you can give the kid a good life) is a rare and amazing gift to any lifeform.

Having a child is the single worst thing you can do for the environment. No way around that.

Ah yes. Some great reasons here. To keep the pension system ticking and to keep your man (because obviously no one is a single mother so a kid is like handcuffing him to you forever).

Because every time I walk into his room no matter how much of a rough night he’s had when he wakes up he’s excited to see me.

Have a look at something called the Demographic Transition Model. U.K. is currently at stage 4. Over the next few years we will naturally enter stage 5 (Germany and Japan are already there) and will start to see our population start to decline, leaving us with an ageing population. This means that dependants (15 and below and 65+) will outnumber the working population, causing issues with subsiding those dependants through people of working age’s taxes.
As countries continue to develop, they will follow the DTM through the stages and global population will peak at 11 Billion before starting to reduce.

This is inevitable so, if you chose to have a baby, it really won’t make much difference.

The world is crazy as fuck lately! I am really worry about what people are getting into theirs heads. From one extreme to the other! Great!

Well, in that case, living is the single worst thing you can do for the environment, and where does this get us? This reminds me of those articles about how many thousands of pounds weddings have to cost or how much it costs to raise a child... hugely inflated, and they’re not true in all cases, and the ecological impact of a child isn’t necessarily off the scale either. Where does this leave pets? Where anything?

I agree with a previous poster though, if you’re getting hung up about this, don’t have children yet.

On paper no one would have children (and definitely not more than one). In real life - they are the best things in the world, my favourite people and make life worth living (even in the midst of a pandemic). You have to go through it to understand why, but they are absolutely worth everything else.

Because I didn't want to regret NOT having them. Purely selfish decision. I've enjoyed it more than I thought I would, and after a dry start, developed a whole new social life thanks to them. Hopefully they'll also be decent human beings.

If you love kids you must have quite a list? What do you love about them?

Please don’t have children with someone who thinks those children will be a waste of resources. It’s not fair on them.

Best reason for you to have a biological child and not adopt? If you're not totally commited to adoption as a couple, then you're not the right people to adopt. Sorry If that sounds harsh, but children needing adoption need total commitment. Of course you could have one biologically and one through adoption, but if one is an essential (to one of you) and the other is an extra desirable (to the other of you), would they be valued equally? That could work both ways depending on your feelings and his.
Another reason to have a child biologically is because you really want to 😀

If you commited to adoption fully in the future, that child would be yours. Yes, adoption can be difficult but that doesn't make it the wrong path for so many children and their forever families. I've heard that childbirth can make ones eyes water a little too!

Good luck with whatever you decide in the future. Being a parent is a privilege and a responsibility however it comes to you and I hope if you decide to have one or several in any way you choose, that you enjoy it. Before then, not your sleep! 😀

Enjoy your sleep I mean!

Does your dh have an otherwise quite puritan life?

Is he vegan? Does he have an electric car? Does he get abroad on holiday? Is everything in your home as eco friendly as possible?

If not, then maybe ask yourself why he is sticking on this?

A few reasons:
To provide employment for teachers
To create an entire market for Baby and Children merchandise
To provide something for you and your DH to talk about
Lasts longer than a dog or cat