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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbours pissed off - AIBU?

269 replies

Pigtailsandall · 09/01/2021 08:20

Our local authority encourages asymptomatic testing, so before Christmas we ordered home testing kits, expecting to see DH's elderly parents. We got moved to tier 4 so there was no point in doing the test. We did nothing over Christmas, DH did a quick dash to the shops twice, I took our toddler to the playground on the 23rd and we got a few takeaway coffees from the local cafe. Other than that, we went for a daily walk either in the woods or small local park.
On the 27th DH complained headache but he had been up with DC at night who had been teething. Otherwise we were all healthy (and the headache passed during the day).
On New Year's Eve we decided to send off our Covid tests anyway as we had them lying around, and DC was due back in nursery on the 4th and I was due at work on the 3rd. After dropping them off, we went for a walk in the park and met a couple few doors down who have a DC same age. We kept a distance, chatted for about 10 minutes with the kids running around. Our tests came back in the 2nd and to our horror, DH tested positive. I and DC were both negative. We told the neighbours we met (also called the cafe we had visited) and the neighbours got furious with us. Absolutely fuming, they said we were irresponsible for being out after doing a Covid test and DH had been symptomatic (he hadn't). I get that they are stressed about getting Covid but if they are that concerned maybe they shouldn't go out at all as our contact was short and distanced, and I told them that because I was getting a bit fed up - their messages were coming through more and more irritated and frantic (DH was much more diplomatic)
AIBU for being annoyed at the neighbours? I tried to stay diplomatic but I felt they totally overreacted.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
YouBoughtMeAWall · 09/01/2021 13:02

Have you actually read the questions that you are asked to answer when booking a symptomatic test?

Yes because unlike others, I take a test when I need to rather than just deciding I don’t have covid. Grin

He didn’t need to order a test. He had one sitting there. And chose not to take it, and even after he did eventually take it, he didn’t keep to himself.

UrAWizHarry · 09/01/2021 13:02

@YouBoughtMeAWall

the reason that OP even mentioned the headache was to illustrate that they paid attention to him having a headache and concluded that it was not a Covid symptom.

Which was their mistake. What they should have done, instead of deciding they could tell it wasn’t covid by just deciding it wasn’t, was taken a test.

Do you seriously think that anyone with a headache should get a test?

I had a bad nights sleep a couple of days ago and got a headache? Do you think it would be a worthwhile use of testing capacity for me to get a test when I know with almost 100% certainty (due to the fact I've barely stepped out of my house for a month) that I don't have COVID?

YouBoughtMeAWall · 09/01/2021 13:04

@UrAWizHarry if you haven’t left your house then you know you won’t have covid. OPs husband clearly has exposed himself- so yeah- it was a possibility he had covid- which he did.

CharlotteRose90 · 09/01/2021 13:04

My only symptom was a headache so you were definitely unreasonable I would have been furious too. After a test you are not meant to go out till you get the results. How utterly selfish of you to worry those poor people.

saraclara · 09/01/2021 13:05

I had a headache yesterday. I took a paracetamol. It went away.

I am not getting a test, because it's not a major symptom and I'd been working at the computer all day doing something very stressful.

I think that is a perfectly normal response to getting a mild headache.

supersonicginandtonic · 09/01/2021 13:05

@CharlotteRose90 read the whole bloody thread for goodness sake! I'm worried about humanity with people as stupid as this walking around.
Also why did you take a test for a headache?

MsMD · 09/01/2021 13:06

This is absolutely the fault of the UK government/NHS. A headache is a symptom of Covid and one I see very regularly. If you were in a different country getting a Covid test with a headache is recommended and then isolating until you get your results.

Yet for some inconceivable reason the UK has decided the Fever/Cough/Taste Smell are the only symptoms that matter when it's not true. That's not YOUR fault because you followed guidance but that shouldn't be the guidance.

You are probably being unreasonable telling your neighbors they shouldnt leave the house though. That's also not guidance. And they've probably seen what most people have - that a headache is a symptom even if the Government says not and they therefore think he was symptomatic.

Hard situation I dont think either of you are that unreasonable.

UrAWizHarry · 09/01/2021 13:06

[quote YouBoughtMeAWall]@UrAWizHarry if you haven’t left your house then you know you won’t have covid. OPs husband clearly has exposed himself- so yeah- it was a possibility he had covid- which he did.[/quote]
Even if I had been out, nobody should be taking a test just because they have a headache.

saraclara · 09/01/2021 13:08

@CharlotteRose90

My only symptom was a headache so you were definitely unreasonable I would have been furious too. After a test you are not meant to go out till you get the results. How utterly selfish of you to worry those poor people.
Jesus.

Read. The. Thread.

OP lives in an area where they are doing mass testing of people without symptoms. That is the test they had. You do NOT need to isolate while you wait for the results of those tests. They got the tests so they could check that they were safe to visit GPs. When the visit couldn't go ahead, they used them to check they were ok to go back to school and work. Nothing at all to do with the mild headache five days before.

CheetasOnFajitas · 09/01/2021 13:10

@YouBoughtMeAWall

Have you actually read the questions that you are asked to answer when booking a symptomatic test?

Yes because unlike others, I take a test when I need to rather than just deciding I don’t have covid. Grin

He didn’t need to order a test. He had one sitting there. And chose not to take it, and even after he did eventually take it, he didn’t keep to himself.

So you have lied about your symptoms in order to get a test when you only have a headache, which is not one of the symptoms listed on the test request site.
YouBoughtMeAWall · 09/01/2021 13:10

And just like I said, this is why we can’t stay out of lockdown....

AvoidingNextdoorNeighbour · 09/01/2021 13:10

People get headaches all the time. It is not a Covid symptom.
Having Covid and having a headache is coincidental, that's all.
I once had a headache at the same time I stubbed my toe. I guess headaches must be a toe stubbing effect?

YouBoughtMeAWall · 09/01/2021 13:11

So you have lied about your symptoms in order to get a test when you only have a headache, which is not one of the symptoms listed on the test request site.

Ummm nope! Can you read?

YouBoughtMeAWall · 09/01/2021 13:11

It is not a Covid symptom.

Yes it is.

CheetasOnFajitas · 09/01/2021 13:12

@YouBoughtMeAWall

So you have lied about your symptoms in order to get a test when you only have a headache, which is not one of the symptoms listed on the test request site.

Ummm nope! Can you read?

Please show me the link to where “headache” is listed as a symptom that allows you to get a test?
supersonicginandtonic · 09/01/2021 13:13

@YouBoughtMeAWall I get a headache when I eat cheese to late at night. Or daily at the moment due to my pregnancy. Shall I get a test? 🙄

AvoidingNextdoorNeighbour · 09/01/2021 13:13

@YouBoughtMeAWall it's MN, some are only able to read the parts of a sentence that fit their narrative.
A number of MNers do not just read between the lines, they scrub out what an OP writes completely and puts a new story in its place.

UrAWizHarry · 09/01/2021 13:13

You may get a headache with COVID.

A headache by itself is not a strong indicator of COVID, and given how stretched testing capacity is, you should not be requesting a test with headache as the only symptom unless advised to by a medical professional.

AvoidingNextdoorNeighbour · 09/01/2021 13:14

*some, like you,

supersonicginandtonic · 09/01/2021 13:14

@UrAWizHarry a sensible person 🥳

YouBoughtMeAWall · 09/01/2021 13:18

A headache has been a symptom from the very start of this pandemic. Unless you know it’s because you ate cheese or walked into a wall then it should give you pause for thought rather than just deciding you know it isn’t covid. Particularly if you have been in contact with others and so potentially exposed- as OPs DH clearly was.

CheetasOnFajitas · 09/01/2021 13:19

@YouBoughtMeAWall

A headache has been a symptom from the very start of this pandemic. Unless you know it’s because you ate cheese or walked into a wall then it should give you pause for thought rather than just deciding you know it isn’t covid. Particularly if you have been in contact with others and so potentially exposed- as OPs DH clearly was.
Still waiting for you to show me how you can get a test without lying if you only have a headache?
CheetasOnFajitas · 09/01/2021 13:23

@YouBoughtMeAWall

What part of “you can ONLY get a free NHS test if...” do you think I was misunderstanding when you barked at me “can you read?”.

Neighbours pissed off - AIBU?
SchrodingersImmigrant · 09/01/2021 13:24

Well I got a headache now. Oh no👀

My family is in EU country and single case of headache with nothing else wouldn't do it either. Persistent headache or headache mix with other symptoms is a different matter though

YouBoughtMeAWall · 09/01/2021 13:25

Still waiting for you to show me how you can get a test without lying if you only have a headache?

Grin

It’s ok. Just do exactly as you’re told, when you’re told and don’t use your brain at all.

What part of “you can ONLY get a free NHS test if...” do you think I was misunderstanding when you barked at me “can you read?”.

I was asking can you read because you seemed to be struggling to read my post. Instead you decided to make things up like saying I had lied to get a test. Which wasn’t anywhere at all in my post.