To be dismayed and frankly repulsed by DH’s long grey hair ?

[Peanutbrittle99]

During Lockdown#1 in March when all the barbers closed, like most men, DH’s hair grew longer. DH is in his late 50’s, very thin / balding on top and now grey/white (used to be blonde). He has had his hair very short (No2) for years & went to barbers every 4-6 weeks. So it’s now December and DH hasn’t had his haircut once since beginning of March.... He refuses- he likes it. Can now get it in a ponytail. I can’t bear the way he looks. His hair is lank, sticks out at the sides, like white fluffy clouds, always looks greasy, although he does shower every day. He has a bald patch at back of head with lank strips of hair dangling over it. It’s ageing, scruffy, deeply unattractive (to me) and puts me right off. I’ve asked him many times to get his hair cut, have bought hair clippers. He refuses. He’s a handsome man, still very fit and in good shape. He doesn’t care at all that I don’t like it. When we first met nearly 20 years ago, he had a lot of opinions on how women looked (still does). Long hair = good/right. Bobs/fringes = bad/wrong. My hair has been more or less always shoulder length . Sometimes a bit shorter/ sometimes a fringe. I wear my hair how I like but I really don’t think I would stick with a look if my DH said he really really didn’t like it & found it unattractive. Sometimes I find myself staring at him in disgust...AIBU?

[Monty27]

Take a photo of the back of it and use it as a screensaver
On absolutely every screen in the house

[Peanutbrittle99]

Yes I think that’s a good tactic and also to get our mutual female friends to let him know he’s giving everyone the ick , not just his wife?

[MarkRuffaloCrumble]

Brilliant idea Monty. No need to say a word - when he sees it in all its lack of glory, he’ll lop it off ASAP

[Peanutbrittle99]

😂😂😂. Now I like that one @Monty27

[Monty27]

Not a word needs to be said

[Bahhhhhumbug]

@ Monty27

[Cheeseandwin5]

I am not sure if this is a joke post or not but it and some of the replies are deeply depressing.
I know ppl like to see those pointing out double standards as some sign of self loathing (but obviously ignoring the hypocrite issue) but this is a clear one. Worse still seeing denying sex as some sort of agreeable punishment.
If a man didnt like how his DW looked and started denying her any extra money because of it woukld we all be agreeing ??
Sorry your DH is happy with the way he looks, thay should be the most overriding factor for you.
Also you say I wear my hair how I like but I really don’t think I would stick with a look if my DH said he really really didn’t like it & found it unattractive. maybe he is just happy that you are.
It is controlling, manupilative abusive and rather horrible, and if you dont believe me, do another post and put yourself in your DH position and see what replies you get.

[GoingForASwim]

Swap his shampoo bottle with some hair remover cream?

Only joking.

Maybe.

[Peanutbrittle99]

I hope to update with good hair news in the not too distant!

[StopSquirtingBleachOnCaneToads]

I wonder if it's become a matter of principle type thing? As in, you keep telling him you hate it so he's definitely keeping it and revelling in the rebellion, even though he may not really like it, deep down.

Maybe tell him it's grown on you and now you actually love it? Whether or not this works would really depend on his personality type.

Only other suggestion I have is to come up with an elaborate plan that results in you accidentally shaving his head. I don't know how you'd pull that one off... but I'm sure it's possible.

[1forAll74]

I would let him be if he want's a new look, he likes the look, and that's it.

[Palatka]

Skullet

[user1473878824]

So you’ve have bobs and fringes over the years knowing he disliked it? Then fair is fair and be gets to do this, surely? The greasy thing: is he actually washing his hair? I’d also find it unattractive OP but also it’s just hair and you’ve had hairstyles he doesn’t like over the years. Can you work on a compromise? (Which I can’t imagine any of us saying I’d this was the other way around.)

[StopSquirtingBleachOnCaneToads]

The greasy thing: is he actually washing his hair?

I wondered that. If he's had very short hair his whole life he may not know how to look after long hair. I think it's legitimate to expect your partner to wash properly, so I don't think there's anything wrong in speaking to him about this.

[OldAndWornOut]

Promise him a night of eroticism in return for his compliance in the hair dilemma.

[OldAndWornOut]

Is there anyway you could borrow some nits?

[thosetalesofunexpected]

@Peanutbrittle99.

😂😂😂😂
Thanks for cheering me up with your Post.L.o.l

[Yeahnahmum]

And you look exactly the same as 20 years ago? Come on. You may not like it. But he does. His personality hasnt changed
Only his hair. Help him style it maybe. But besides that leave him to it

[thosetalesofunexpected]

@Papatron
Your Lucky your husband still looks like that at his age.😂

[thosetalesofunexpected]

@BritWifeinUSA

😂😂😂😂
Good point
Nice one reassuring Op like that L.o.l

[Monty27]

OP keep us posted
Play nicely now

[oakleaffy]

@Peanutbrittle99

Think Terry Nutkin

Oh gross.

Long hair on men only looks good if their hair is thick, zero baldness /receding hairline, and well cared for.

Most men have the good sense to shave it off once baldness happens.

Oddly the men in our family all have good thick heads of hair into dotage... Must be genes?

But if they were to go bald, off it would come.

[oakleaffy]

@OldAndWornOut

Is there anyway you could borrow some nits?

Haaaahaha!!!

[Oblomov20]

Sorry. This thread too has really cheered me up.

[oakleaffy]

@Palatka

Skullet

Haaaaaaaaaha!!

Oh my word... Will have to remember this one!

Thanks for the laugh!