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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be super upset. Travelled from a safe list country

221 replies

starrain · 26/12/2020 12:00

Iv just come back from a country yesterday which is on the safe list and has less cases than the uk. My pregnant sister lives with my mum and I wanted to go and see them today as my daughter is itching to see them and my niece.
Iv kind of been warned off and told dont come because iv been travelling and be cautious. But there is no where on the govt rules to quarantine or isolate after travelling from this country. My mum said she doesnt mind but my sister most likely does mind but won't just come out and say it. I kinda get it but at the same time I'm actually so so upset. I had got them gifts and was going to give them and also my daughter got all ready to meet them now I have to tell her no:(

OP posts:
Schmoozer · 26/12/2020 13:04

Yabu
Airports
Planes
I wouldn’t go near you with a barge pole !

AntiHop · 26/12/2020 13:07

My point is, if there was danger in any kind of travelling then there would be quarantine from every form of travel.

Can anyone seriously believe this? There is a difference between reduced risk and no risk.

Therealjudgejudy · 26/12/2020 13:08

This has to be a joke. Surely no one is this clueless and selfish...Hmm

RainMoon · 26/12/2020 13:09

It’s not the country that you’ve travelled from, it’s the germ box of a plane you fly on. Unless you are wearing a fully fitted mask with respirator or hazmat suit, then one person at the front of the plane can infect someone at the back. Talk of planes having filters is bollocks as the air has to get to them first, you’re all sharing it.

NurseButtercup · 26/12/2020 13:10

This has to be a joke. Surely no one is this clueless and selfish...

This attitude is why it's spreading.

NurseButtercup · 26/12/2020 13:11

I meant the attitude of the OP is why covid-19 is spreading.

Jenala · 26/12/2020 13:14

It's not just the country you've come from though is it. It's the transport. You're right they could have picked it up other places. So you minimise risk by seeing as few people as possible. Supermarket may not be possible to avoid, but seeing you has been on a plane and in airport, they can avoid. Reducing risk. Saying there's other places they could get it is such a dumb, non point.

squiddybear · 26/12/2020 13:14

Sorry OP you are being massively unreasonable.

You've just spent time confined in a tin box with other people. Gone through airports etc. Your sister is at increased risk and you wonder why she's cautious.

If you wanted to see them don't travel!

Dishwashersaurous · 26/12/2020 13:15

They can’t both be in your bubble unless they live together.

Beautifulbonnie · 26/12/2020 13:15

Nope. Not playing. You’re not in their bubble. End of

grapewine · 26/12/2020 13:16

@Clarice99

YABVU

I also don't believe your 'story'. But if it is true, you sound selfish.

Your sister is doing the right thing. Have some respect for her taking steps to protect herself and her unborn child.

+1

At best you're very selfish.

Kazzyhoward · 26/12/2020 13:17

You really, REALLY, need to respect your family's wishes. Forget the "rules" - covid can still be spread by people complying with rules. The elderly/vulnerable are being advised to take care/precautions and that's what your family are trying to do.

We've been shielding since March (OH has cancer) - we've literally been nowhere except walks close to home. We've had shopping delivered, we're working from home, we've not had anyone in our house (no tradesmen, no friends, no family). We've just had the mother of all arguments with OH's sister who wanted to come because "she's been nowhere" - except work everyday, except shopping, except her two children have been to school, parties, etc.

People, really, really, need to accept that other people have different lives and want to make their own decisions as to what precautions they want to take.

TomasinaTiers · 26/12/2020 13:18

Just hope this is not real haha

Can it be? A reverse maybe!

Kazzyhoward · 26/12/2020 13:21

@starrain

Wer in tier 3 but they are in my bubble. We are very quick to believe and trust what the government tells us regarding covid cases and tiers etcetc which we should. But the govt has also put certain countries on safe list AND allowed travel without quarantine for a reason. So how come we only believe the parts we want to believe. My point is, if there was danger in any kind of travelling then there would be quarantine from every form of travel.
You clearly don't understand different levels of risk. It's all about reducing risk, not avoiding it. If we wanted to avoid it, then everything would be shut down. Reducing risk means putting yourself in less risky situations where possible. Your family are trying to reduce their risk and have decided that you going into their "bubble" is too risking for them. You need to respect that. Their risk of covid is higher than yours, it's completely unfair for you to force your risk onto them.
Kittromney · 26/12/2020 13:21

Nonsensical post OP. If by any chance it is not fake then you are very naive. Just because a country is on a UK travel corridor doesn’t mean the Covid-19 virus is guaranteed to avail you during your travels 🤦🏻‍♀️

Kittromney · 26/12/2020 13:22

Avoid*

LaceyBetty · 26/12/2020 13:23

Not that I think it makes a difference and totally agree with most that the OP should not visit, but, for clarity, if she is a single parent she can be in a bubble with her mum and sister who live together.

ILoveAllRainbowsx · 26/12/2020 13:29

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Xerochrysum · 26/12/2020 13:30

I'm sorry but it was your choice to travel this time. Maybe you should have planned it so that you could have SI before meeting them on Christmas. You just need to SI for 2 weeks now, and lots of people are doing it, regardress of they have to or not.
It really doesn't matter what the gov's safe list whatever. If you love your family, you would do best to keep them safe.

CandlesBlanketsandTea · 26/12/2020 13:30

What airport did you travel through in the UK? Did you use public transport to get to your destination? I can't understand how you don't understand why your pregnant sister doesn't want to see you in the middle of the pandemic! 🙄

notimagain · 26/12/2020 13:31

What airline did you go on that did a flight on Christmas day to Britain?

At the risk of being slightly off topic you do realise that the airlines, even the British ones don't stop flying into/out of the UK on Christmas day, don't you?..

BTW Interesting how many people who chucked in "recycled" air forgot to mention HEPA filters..

custardbear · 26/12/2020 13:31

YABVU
Pregnant women are more at risk of more severe respiratory illnesses including Covid snd flu - you've been to an airport, on a plane with loads of people, recycled air abd in the air for/same space as loads of people for way longer than 15 minutes so you've been upping your risk factors - she's right to avoid you and your family

ivfbeenbusy · 26/12/2020 13:32

Your sister visiting a 20,000 square foot ventilated supermarket with social distancing measures in place for 30 minutes is a bit different to you spending several hours packed in like a sardine a few inches from a stranger breathing recycled air isn't it? 🤷‍♀️

EveryoneRevealsThemselves · 26/12/2020 13:32

I suspect you need to read up on the rules of bubbles OP

Tal45 · 26/12/2020 13:32

If the sister and mum live together they are one household. If she is a single parent she is allowed to form a bubble with another household. I don't know where she is breaking the rules there or why everyone is convinced it's a fake post.

Maybe it's not the country that you travelled to that they have issue with but the fact you had to go through an airport and get on a plane to get back? I thikn they are just being understandably cautious although perhaps it would have been nice if they'd made it clear you wouldn't be welcome before you got on the plane (assuming you had the option not to come back).

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