In thinking that if women went on strike, there'd be no Christmas?

[HotelliFinlandia]

All around me I see women busting a gut to organise the gifts, the food, get the food shopping/order food shopping and while there are some men around me who will help out, not a single one (in heterosexual relationships at least) is in charge of organising Christmas. They may contribute, but if their partner just downed tools, Christmas would either not happen or be dramatically smaller.

They're happy to receive gifts and eat the meal though.

But I wonder if this is just the people around me?

Are there women out there with male partners who basically do all of Christmas and they just need to get a couple of gifts and turn up?

My boyfriend and I don’t live together but he’s done all his own stuff. If we could have been together he would have done way more than me as I’m working mad hours. He’s organised and planned Christmas dinner and got all presents for himself and his child and their family.

Like. I don’t clean. I don’t do dishes. I don’t do any wife work or thinking for him.

It’s all on him.

I’ve worked through COVID and I’m still working my dp has got it all sorted
The food,the prep,the gifts,cards posted to everyone,the kids all chilled out
He usually cooks Xmas and we share the prep but this year he’s been fab

I think on a whole world (that celebrates Xmas) then yes- Christmas wouldn’t happen if women didn’t do all they do for it. Of course there are individual families where men do their fair share of more of the prep and planning. But on the whole it’s generally women doing the bulk of it.

Maybe it's a bit of an indication that lots of that "work" is just unnecessary and self inflicted...

This does happen. I'm too bossy to let it happen in my house though.

I buy and wrap all the presents.
I organise the food shop delivery.
I sort out the kids' activities, school stuff etc.

He cooks Christmas Dinner, and most day to day meals. Will unload dishwasher, take bins out, hang up laundry.

He takes the DCs out to the park for ages. Puts them to bed. Plays with them indoors. He gets me a nice present every year.

We both work full time. I think it's a pretty equal split.

Are there women out there with male partners who basically do all of Christmas and they just need to get a couple of gifts and turn up?
Yep, me. We had a chat about presents for DC but he ordered them and he had the chat with my brother's wife about what to get niece and nephew. Adults on my side do charity gifts only so I did those but he sorted his side.

I have hardly anything to with food anyway, he went out and bought everything last night and will do all the catering as normal.

I was there when we picked a tree but he did everything else to organise decorating.

I have done some crafty stuff with DC because I finished work last week.

Not the presents, but my dh usually does the food shop, many years with 2 children in tow as I've been working, and also cooks the whole meal, including making own stuffing. I do my bit of course, but he can do it just fine without help. Wasn't the case with my parents though, don't think my dad lifted a finger!

I genuinely don’t get it,women shouldering all domestic tasks,I swore I’d never do it
Genuinely made a conscious choice I’d not partner up with a useless lump of a man who didn’t pull his weight
We share and he’s not one of those men. His mum doesn’t approve she thinks I should do more, and he’s a poor overloaded lamb

Nope. But both me and DH like a basic Christmas.

Interesting. I have:

Done the food shop
Got presents for family and friends including December birthdays
Posted cards
Got the decorations down from the loft
Went and bought the tree and got it home in the car
Put up all the tree decorations
Made Christmas biscuits
Made mince pies

DH has bought my present

Of all those things I did, if I wasn't here I think DH would have bought food. I'm not sure about anything else. Maybe next year I won't do these things and see what happens!

YABU I think.

Sure there are guys out there who don't do anything and think the fairies do it all, but there are plenty of guys who do more than there fair share too.

My husband organises Christmas and I do what he's planned . I can't be arsed to organise anything.
It suits him as he's very organised and I'd forget so much if he wasn't.
He does the bulk of the shopping too.
I wrap , as I like doing it and he doesn't.
Teamwork really!

I don't know, we buy presents for our own families but from all of us and it ends up working out about equal, I write the shopping list but usually we go and get it together (not this year though) and we share buying presents for DS and wrapping. In terms of dinner we usually go elsewhere, this year I'm doing Xmas dinner and then he is doing the boxing day buffet with leftovers and a few bits- so we share most things.

Are there women out there with male partners who basically do all of Christmas and they just need to get a couple of gifts and turn up?

That's pretty much how it works in my house. DH puts up all the decorations, does the main food shop, buys all the gifts for his family and a lot of the Santa gifts for the kids. I buy for my family, get a few of the Santa gifts, and I wrap whilst DH provides wrapping paper, sellotape and either cups of tea or glasses of wine. Note, I actively enjoy wrapping presents, I find it soothing like how other people enjoy jigsaws. I also add some nice extra food bits to my regular online grocery shop, which isn't exactly a hardship.

I forgot to say that DH has cooked every Christmas dinner we've had at home for the last 13 years (all but 3 I think).

My DP has bought all of the kids presents (apart from the odd little thing I got), wrapped them all, done all the food shopping, purchased the tree, and will do all of the Christmas Dinner as I cant cook to save my life.

In our house I think presents would be scaled back and there would be no cards, but DH is always in charge of food and loves sourcing and prepping dinner and the tea time buffet way ahead of time. I could easily see him and both DC watching Christmas movies all day, surrounded by food, which they'd all love. The big, all out Christmas is definitely fuelled by me.

DH does his family presents and cards. I do mine and most of ds' presents

He got the tree and decorations out and we both put them out

He made Christmas rockie roads

He did the Christmas supermarket shop (I got the last bits today - 5 mins in Sainsburys)

I will cook Christmas dinner. He always loads the dishwasher and takes everything out.

I think he probably does more than I do but I make sure nothing is missed. As a pp said, good teamwork.

My husband usually cooks at home, but I cook Christmas dinner as a change - he'd be perfectly capable of cooking it himself, though.

He does all the shopping as well.

The advantages of having a semi 'house husband' are immense.

We've mostly done it together. I ordered most presents for folks online because I like shopping/choosing stuff more than him. And I've mostly wrapped them as they've arrived in dribs and drabs.

He went and bought (real) tree and put it up. DC and I decorated it together cos we like doing it. DH and DC put the ceiling decorations up. I wrote cards to my family, DH wrote them to his.

We've done food shop together. He'll do all the veg prep (the boring bit) on Christmas Eve. I'll cook Christmas Day because I like cooking and tbh it's pretty easy. Shove a turkey in the oven and leave it.

DC and DH will probably load dishwasher and wash pans.

I do all the presents for the children and my family. Dh does his family and all the food. He cooks the Christmas dinner and I clean the house. It’s quite an even split I feel. He has input into the kids gifts but I buy and wrap them.

He plans the food, buys the food, prepares the food and cooks the food.
He makes sure there's enough booze.
He makes bubble n squeak on Boxing day.
He buys DDs presents.
He puts the decorations up.

I make tea, breakfasts, do the washing up, clearing up, wrap the presents (apart ones from him to me) and not much else. I am a Grinch. I'd rather watch Netflix Christmas films (the bad ones) and eat Pringles but I put a "of course I'm enjoying myself" face on all day.

We do most of it together and he does all the cooking.

I sorted presents for my family, he did his. We sat and wrote cards / wrapped presents together drinking wine and catching up.

Did the food shop together and he’ll cook. I maybe did more meal planning. Decorating he got the tree down from the loft and again we did it together. I did the Garland as I fancied trying out a natural one this year.

That’s about it?

My partner (male) is cooking our Christmas dinner and does just as much if not more than I do in terms of cooking, cleaning etc. I don't have to tell him what to do because, err, he is a grown adult and also not a misogynistic pig.

I am often shocked at the number of women on here who have man-children or people with extremely outdated/ sexist views as partners though! Feel very lucky.