Am I allowed to be upset by this

[allgoodinthehood]

Relevant
My partner is one of the nicest people you have met . He is kind, considerate, loving and generous.
He is annoyed at me because I'm upset that he hasn't got me a card for Christmas.
I've said I appreciate all that he does for me . He does alot small and big things . He would give me his last penny.
He has been to three shops today to try and get a suitable card but no luck.
He says hes annoyed Im pissed off . Ive said I'm not pissed off but I am upset that he hasnt got me a card.
He says " but you know I dont do cards " I know for a fact he would be rightfully upset if I didnt get him a birthday card.
So tell me strait AIBU
When I say upset I dont mean crying and the like I just mean Ive gone quiet but not in an angry way.
Oh and he has got me a present.

the only card ibought this year was for my new grandson, im a proper card person i love buying them choosing the perfect one , but with all this covid business im not in the mood , and im not bothered about getting any this year , or gifts to be fair

No we never get cards for each other, don’t think we ever have!
It would not even enter my mind to be honest
Yabu It’s definitely not worth getting upset for x

YABU. My family like many others has experienced terrible heartbreak this year. If you have enough head space to be upset your dh hasn't bought you a Christmas card you really should be dancing down the street (socially distanced if course). I'm not meaning to be sour grapes but really truly this is not something to worry about.

YABU

I've only got my partner a card as I happened to have a box from last year and we are only exchanging a couple of very basic gifts bought online . Much rather have our Christmas Day middle of next year than put either of us through going out to shop unnecessarily and put each other at risk ( tier 4)

@PlanDeRaccordement

If cards were just to send to other households then their wouldn't be a whole section in card shops saying 'husband' or 'wife'. Most married couples live together.

What matters to one person might not matter to another. I'm sure you would have a hissy fit over something she might not.

And I don't know anyone who recycles cards from their husband or wife, or kids. If my kid gave me a card, I'd keep it until I die. These little things can one day be sentimental, especially when that loved one is no longer with us.

"He is kind, considerate, loving and generous." What on else more could you reasonably ask for? You are incredibly fortunate, and I think he must be feeling very hurt that you are being such a nippy sweetie over a card when he shows you all year round that he loves you. Apologise to him and tell him you've realised how silly you've been and that you'd rather have a kiss on Christmas morning than any card.

YABU. Sorry. Honestly, he sounds lovely. What a silly thing to be even remotely upset about? If I could give you just a tiny insight into the kind of men I have had the misfortune of being involved with resulting in lone pregnancy and single parenthood.... really try to focus on the wonderful things you bring to each other’s lives, rather than a piece of cardboard folded I half. x

Yabvu

I haven't even got my kids Christmas cards nevermind my husband.

If it was your birthday or anniversary then yes, be upset. If he didn't get you a Christmas present, sure be a bit miffed. But a Christmas card? Yeah, you're being a bit unreasonable.

We are in the midst of a pandemic and people are supposed to be minimising contact with others and you’ve got your husband trailing around shops looking for a card. Unreasonable doesn’t come close.

How old are you? 6? It’s a card! Madness lol

I don’t do Christmas cards all my friends know this, I do however buy them nice gifts. Cards are so pointless and especially now when we are supposed to be social distancing, you are being very unreasonable

Being blunt here but think you need it.... Grow the fuck up!!! ITS A CARD!! Embrace his kindness, empathy and loyalty.
You're acting like a spoilt, petulant child.

You are being extremely unreasonable!!! Poor Man! We are in the middle of a pandemic and you expect him to be out searching for a card amongst all the germ-ridden people. Surely there are more important things. That’s especially true this year. I think you are being absolutely ridiculous.

Normally this would annoy me but as we're in the middle of a pandemic I told dh not to bother as it doesn't seem essential. I'd love it if he'd thought to do it earlier but he's bought me presents and he's a good egg so I'll get over it this year.

Give him a break this year op, sure he's learnt his lesson for next year

Get the kids craft stuff out if you have kids - he can make one

Erm yes sorry you are being hugely unreasonable. Bit first world problem and in light of the mess we are all in not something I could get upset about. Especially if as you say he is generous and fabulous at all other times. Cut the man some slack, he has tried and you are set to ruin your festive season over a blooming card.

You're part of a couple. Why does he need to buy you a Christmas card? And the poor man searched three shops to try and make you happy. I think you need to grovel an apology before he finds someone who appreciates him.

@IndecentFeminist

We don't swap cards at Christmas, we live together. Is this a common thing to do?

I never swapped Christmas cards with my partner of 30+ years. I’ve always thought that they’re supposed to be for people you don’t see at this time of the year. I have posted quite a few this year because obviously I’m not seeing my friends (no family now). I’m retired now but even when I worked I didn’t give cards to my colleagues that I would be working with right up to Christmas Eve, I would give a large tin of Roses chocs or similar to be shared instead.

Or even straight - sorry!

You obs live together and it’s not your birthday.... a bit OTT

I generally think it's daft buying cards, especially for people in the same household. I only every write them with a letter to relatives who live a distance away. Cards without letters are a waste of resources, I don't see the point. I haven't written any at all yet this year. I might write some (probably 3) on Christmas day or boxing day if I think about it.

3 shops to try get you a card...YABU

I dislike cards, waste of money and paper

Seriously unreasonable.

You’re actually in a huff over a Christmas card?