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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Just got banned from Hampstead Mums

282 replies

FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 09:29

Kind of laughing. Kind of annoyed. Figured out why the virus is spreading though...

Pointed out that visiting multiple shops for non essential items was poor form in Tier 4. Also said if people actually needed food and couldn't access it I could help with referrals.

I mean are we all going to multiple shops looking for stollen bites, cocoa nibs and gingerbread houses?

Is anyone actually taking Tier 4 seriously?

YANBU - Taking it seriously
YABU - Not taking it seriously, visiting five shops for non essential items is fine.

(Daily Mail Journos - feel free to join the group for your scoop - it's like overheard in waitrose on steroids)

OP posts:
Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 14:39

And the gaslighting from the admin is simply amazing... probably go to name her soon,

OP posts:
yomommasmomma · 22/12/2020 15:02

Honestly the group is hilarious, but you do get some really useful tips and recommendations for local restaurants and tradespeople etc but otherwise it is another world!

Like the OP said there are some really lovely people on the group but there are some very special cases! And the Hampstead mums vs real Hampstead mums was a BIG deal locally and terribly serious!

Staffy1 · 22/12/2020 15:03

I agree, it's bloody stupid to be running from shop to shop to look for something like a ginger bread house when in tier 4.

JacobReesMogadishu · 22/12/2020 15:05

@FestertheJester

And the gaslighting from the admin is simply amazing... probably go to name her soon,
You sound about 12yo. Do you really have nothing more pressing in life to do? How sad.
BuzzingTheBee · 22/12/2020 15:07

Live and let live

Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 15:09

@yomommasmomma No one is allowed to mention Real Hampstead Mums... You must know this?

(and i totally agree the group is amazing for many things... we didnt used to be allowed to talk about private schools etc and it is good those discussions are now allowed).

And Abacus school (my days, at least I did not mention that!)

OP posts:
Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 15:12

@BuzzingTheBee well until they give someone covid. Live and let live, or don' t be a bloody idiot?

OP posts:
TonMoulin · 22/12/2020 15:12

[quote FestertheJester]@ithinkyouareveryrude so you think a gingerbead house is essential?

WOW.[/quote]
Maybe read her posts again then @FestertheJester.

Yes for some people stuff that looks so unnecessary wil be essential to them.
Use your. imagination. Have some compassion for people you know nothing about

trulydelicious · 22/12/2020 15:12

@FestertheJester

we didnt used to be allowed to talk about private schools

It all sounds rather oppresive and OTT

Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 15:15

@trulydelicious Yeah, if you wanted to post a post about private schools you had to give a donation (kind of liked this to be honest) but a bit crap for working parents as well who needed wrap around care.

Abacus school was due to move to an old building - state school, non religous and many people in that group are against it.

OP posts:
LolaSmiles · 22/12/2020 15:18

Yeah, if you wanted to post a post about private schools you had to give a donation (kind of liked this to be honest) but a bit crap for working parents as well who needed wrap around care.

What? Are these people for real? Grin

Rules about discussing private schools, videos shaming families in tier 2 but several outings for gingerbread is essential. Ah how the other half live.

Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 15:36

@LolaSmiles Honestly many of them are lovely (clearly not the new admin, probably nice too just acting like children and refusing to give me an explanation or answer messages - block block block - are those the kind of people you would like running a support group, probably not)...

But yes if you wanted to post about private schools you had to make a donation

OP posts:
Blondiney · 22/12/2020 15:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 15:49

I guess we have ascertained it gingerbread houses and covid for many people.

OP posts:
LolaSmiles · 22/12/2020 16:34

FestertheJester
I'm sure many are. There's always a core in groups who get a bit power crazy.

I'm in a couple of interest groups and the admins are hilarious, for example commenting on threads in capitals if they don't like the conversation. Many of the posters are lovely and knowledgeable but some clearly haven't moved on from the playground. Grin

ithinkyouareveryrude · 22/12/2020 16:53

[quote FestertheJester]@ithinkyouareveryrude so you think a gingerbead house is essential?

WOW.[/quote]
At the expense of someone’s mental health? Absolutely.

If that one shred of joy stops someone killing themselves? Completely.

It may not be a gingerbread house. It may be a distraction, a coping mechanism, an afternoon passed by.

Suicides and mental health issues are at one of their highest recorded levels. People are hanging on by a thread.

To you it’s a gingerbread - to them it may be something more. Have a little empathy. I will repeat you have no clue what others are going through.

midnightstar66 · 22/12/2020 16:55

Meh, if the shops are open then go to them and get whatever you need. Wear a mask. YABVU to appoint yourself covid police when it's permitted

TonMoulin · 22/12/2020 16:58

@Blondiney, swearing and insulting another has lost you the moral high ground unfortunately.

Blibbyblobby · 22/12/2020 17:27

It's very simple - the fewer shops you go to, the fewer people you interact with. The fewer people are interacting, the less the virus spreads.

The rules are not a line that means everything that's allowed is 100% safe and everything that's not allowed is 100% unsafe.

The rules are where they are to balance the impossibility of completely isolating everyone at home with the certainty that as long as people are interacting, some of those interactions will transfer the virus.

Someone who choses to visit multiple shops, while not breaking the rules, is choosing to increase the risk of transmission and since the cumulative effect of those choices impacts more than the individuals who make them, it's not "just their business and no one elses".

But people really don't like having their flaws pointed out. It's human nature to react with "I am a good person, I do this thing, therefore it can't be a bad thing, therefore the person saying it's wrong to do it is a nasty person driven by nasty reasons". Hence all the misdirection about "covid police" or "well the rules don't say you can't" instead of just saying honestly "I'm prepared to increase the rate of transmission to get the Christmas day I want."

YANBU.

Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 18:57

@Blibbyblobby that post exactly.

Anyway, banned, a new day tomorrow, I guess I am lucky that I can spend it ( virtually)with people who are at least adult enough to explain why they remove someone from a community and who would always follow up with that explanation or answer questions. Adulting or something.

OP posts:
Blondiney · 22/12/2020 19:26

[quote TonMoulin]@Blondiney, swearing and insulting another has lost you the moral high ground unfortunately.[/quote]
Zero fucks given.

confuseddotcom090 · 22/12/2020 19:37

I can see why you're crapping yourselves about this virus 

confuseddotcom090 · 22/12/2020 19:37

Ah bollocks
Pic fail

Original poster
FestertheJester · 22/12/2020 19:52

Still no pic...

I am crapping myself about the virus because I am CEV.

OP posts:
JanewaysBun · 22/12/2020 22:08

Wow my local mum's group is so boring compared to this! Just local PTs advertising their services

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