to think Swinging is disgusting? (long rant sorry)

[TanishasMum]

I have a problem with friends of ours that are into swinging - she even likes women iykwim?. The thing is, DH likes this couple and don't get me wrong they are a nice couple but I feel very uncomfortable around them especially her as she constantly talks about sex and what they get up to with other couples (makes me feel sick).

Anyway, we meet up with them once a month for a drink/meal and their DD is the same age as ours but AIBU to not want to bother with this couple anymore? My DH likes them though - I think her constant flirting flatters him she is rather big breasted and she asks him jokingly if he wants a feel . I am not exaggerating about this, she is the biggest flirt I have ever met in my life.

I think DH is more than happy to continue the friendship but I am not. I am defo not into swinging but I am wondering if my DH secretly wants to . So AIBU?

YANBU especially about being expected to hear about the details by them. What is it about these people who need an audience for their sex lives? It's like a grown-up version of teenagers who spend every minute they are in together in public sucking face. Like it's no fun if no-one's watching.

As for swinging, maybe it's good for some people, but I get the impression that quite a few women go along with it to please their creepy perv husbands.

< ducks >

whats with the pampas grass??

Elizabeth - she is the instigator though

pampas grass - sign of swingers. Allegedly

ok well, here is my two pence worth. I find the idea of swinging a little bit risque and its fantasy fodder. But seeing as the thought of having sex with anyone other than DP abhorrant kind of puts a damper on it really

some women do think about sex a lot..even make moves themselves

my next door neighbours but one - pampas grass!!!! OMG and [barrfff] my MIL has it in her back garden! it gets worse, DP bought it for her!!! oh dear oh dear

look, you are being unreasonable to care so much about what consenting adults do in their spare time, and so what if she is bi! end the friendship, move on, you donlt have to deal with it....

an isolated clump in the front lawn sure sign

you'll spot pampas grass at a hundred paces now. I do

I'm with NomdeWossname. I have absolutely no problem with other people operating non-monogamously and/or non-heterosexually. Why in hell's name shouldn't they? (Especially given that a hell of a lot of ostensibly monogamous people aren't.)

If you don't want to join in and/or you're finding they're ramming it down your throat, so ahem to speak, don't hang out with them. But I don't see why you should condemn them.

Still PMSL at 'she even likes women' - oh the shock! the horror!

no it was the "iykwim" afterwards that had me wetting myself lol

I guess some of you ladies are not against the idea of swinging then? with a male or female?

Sorry called me old fashioned but it is NOT Normal in any shape or form.

not normal in your opinion! you only know what htey do because they have told you, what do you thikn other people do, and don't tell you?

i'm no lady pmsl

what is "normal"?
tbh what consenting adults get up to in their own bedrooms is up to them

Can I just point out, it is half term.

easy now, zippi....

In practice, I think monogamy is rather abnormal. A hell of a lot of people find it unworkable - I was utterly amazed during a single slapper phase some years ago just how many apparently happily married people came on to me. The friends in open relationships (oooh and yes one of them is bisexual, you know) just acknowledge that.

definitely half term thats why im here causing mayhem

Their wives would probably have been amazed at how many of them came on to you too, MI. Don't you think swinging is just an excuse for men with wandering willies to institutionalise it in their marriages?

Well I can barely find the energy for sex with my own husband never mind someone elses!

But aside from that I do not think you are being unreasonable.

If I was unhappy or uncomfortable in the company of a friend for whatever reason, I would have no hesitation in ditching them!
Why waste good time on bad company!!

I must admit, I've recently found out that some aquaintances of ours are swingers and not backward in suggesting that other couples try it with them, and it's entirely changed my view of them. I'll be trying my hardest never to be left alone with either of them in case they bring the topic up and I am forced to admit that I'd rather extract my own teeth than contemplate sex with them. Yuk.
If Brad and Angelina were to beg Dh and me, then we might consider it. But sadly 90% of swingers are pretty grim. In my non-existent experience.

yes Elizabeth you could be right.

What gets me is someone on another thread mentioned they fancied an affair and got slated people were saying what about her marriage vows etc. Well swinging is no different - both partners are being unfaithful right?