To say we have it a lot worse?

[NorthEast322]

Not being able to see my DP who I have been with for 2 and a half years because of coronavirus? He is everything to me but we live apart and cannot be together. Most likely won't even see each other until Easter if we are lucky.
Yes we have kept our jobs and nobody has died/we have not had the virus but aibu to say this is unbelievably tough on us and to not know how we will get through it?

I haven’t seen my family since March (they don’t like in same country as me) and because of restrictions ect I am probably it going to see them into 2022. I am super close to them and this is really heartbreaking for me, so although I’m sympathetic towards you to be able to see my loved ones in 3/4 months or to have seem
Them recently would be amazing to me. So no, I don’t think you have it the worst- not even close.

My uncle is alone this Christmas due to the sudden unexpected death of my aunt. So no.. You're not worse off.

This went well, OP.

@Royalbloo

So move in together?

Indeed. I don't think they want to though or can't. I don't think you really 'know' someone completely until you live together....

Worse than who? A dead person? Moron.

@HowManyToes

I know of a young boy (school age) nearby who has lost both his parents to covid. Do you REALLY think you're worse off than him?

You need to give yourself a fucking shake.

Wow. That is awful. Poor boy

@NorthEast322

Not being able to see my DP who I have been with for 2 and a half years because of coronavirus? He is everything to me but we live apart and cannot be together. Most likely won't even see each other until Easter if we are lucky. Yes we have kept our jobs and nobody has died/we have not had the virus but aibu to say this is unbelievably tough on us and to not know how we will get through it?

Yabu to say you have it a lot worse, yes.

@Ylfa

🤭

😂😂😂 very true.

Op.

I'm sorry you're upset, please try and ignore all the angry responses

The bottom line is we are all upset for our own reasons, and comparing them isn't helpful. You're upset... that's ok.

I'm upset for very different reasons. Gutted in fact.

Comparing isn't helpful.

I'm sorry this is awful for you. It will get better.

I haven’t seen my daughter since early august. My brother since last Christmas. I still thank a god I don’t believe in that I can FaceTime them as they are alive (my dd is still recovering from covid-19)

You can still maintain a relationship through this

Will yous leave off.

Yes people have lost loved ones. Yes people have it worse. But OP is clearly struggling. The equivalent of telling someone they cant be sad because someone else has it worse is telling someone they cant be happy cause someone has it better.

Op, you could have worded your title better
But YANBU.

You could have worded your op a lot better yes !

Haven’t seen my now ex since March although we still chat but the job he was on over here ground to a halt due to Covid so he went back to his home country onto a new contract there , we thought temporarily and he’d be back ,but no ! did long distance for 6-7 months but there is no end it sight and now the travel ban so called it a day for now .

It does feel a bit like people in long distance relationships / single people have had it quite tough , my close family live abroad Too but missing them is different to Missing a partner . Also when people have their family together but are moaning they can’t go to the pub for example It does sting a bit when iv gone months and months with very limited adult company and spent every evening alone once The DC are in bed

However to say I have had it the worst would be ridiculous because people are literally dying , losing their jobs etc etc . Come one now .

• come on

Right. ..

@Wheresmykimchi

Sorry but it’s not the post - it’s the title that needs changing - like now ideally

In all honesty, you sound like a dick.

You have absolutely no idea how anyone else has 'had it'

No, you do not have it worse and you need to get a grip... your post has made me very angry. PEOPLE HAVE DIED!!!! THOUSANDS OF THEM!!! You have not been I'll, not lost your job and you're whinging because you chose to be in a long distance relationship, get s bloody grip! I had covid... 2 months if not being able to.breathe whilst trying to look after 2 young kids as a single mum and I am counting my blessings that I am still here... Yes it's tough... for everyone... but you've got it easy compared to those who have lost loved ones, jobs, houses... everything

Why can't you move in together? Forming a household is allowed?

Why can't you form a support bubble if both single?

Why can't you meet our doors? Even this is allowed in tier 4?

[quote Sunshineandocean]@Wheresmykimchi

Sorry but it’s not the post - it’s the title that needs changing - like now ideally[/quote]
I agree , but the post itself isn't half as bad as people are making out.

Yes YABU “to say we have it a lot worse”

You have one bad thing in your life and that is all. DH and I have had to live apart for six months when moving between continents. DH and the DC went on ahead of me. So I was six months with only Skype once a week to DH and DC. It was bad. So I agree you have a difficult/bad situation. But the reality is that you have it a lot better than millions of others who have had a close relative die and millions more who have lost their jobs/only source of income and are either homeless or about to be homeless.

Oh OP, say, are you new to MN?

Was that title deliberate/clickbait? Epic fail.

If you hadn't started comparing yourself to others, posters wouldn't do the same.

@NorthEast322 yes you aren't having much fun but as others have said it's not a bloody competition
Different things are going to be difficult for different people
I haven't seen my mum since just before the first lockdown and in that time I've had to move her to a care home as her dementia has taken a turn for the worse due to the effects of the restrictions she now no longer knows who she's speaking to unless she sees them.... I still can't see her (she's in a really bad hotspot, vulnerable and I'm vulnerable) she now longer knows who her grandchildren are and doesn't always know who I am anymore.
BUT I'm focusing on the positives, she's safe, looked after and the home are genuinely nice. She's not scared or confused (she was at the beginning of the initial lockdown)

I did vote YABU, but not because others have it worse than you - but because the situation is one you've chosen. Very few other people are not seeing long term partners because the government have told them not to. If you are doing this, it's your personal choice. You could be each other's support bubble (provided one of you lives alone) or have moved in together at any point (moving house is not forbidden even during full UK lockdown). So if you haven't that's kind of on you? If you have it worse it's because you've given it to yourself worse!

Op, that must be a very difficult situation. I commend you for actually following the rules though. Definitely shows your character.

I've not seen my DP since January and don't know when I will be able to. I had to visit my DM to look after her, got caught in the first lockdown and she's had other problems. I was finally set to go back last week and then my DP caught Covid so I couldn't go back and then London was put into Tier 4 so I'm not sure when I'm going to be able to see him.

It's almost been a year and I'm really struggling. You will be able to get through it OP, it is tough but you can do it.