Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to expect relative to sleep on the sofa for a night

345 replies

Helpneededbyanoutsider · 17/12/2020 23:22

Hi, just want outsiders opinions. Obviously xmas is coming up and me and my bf, sister and her bf and mum and dad are meeting up as the 3 bubbles that are allowed.
We are meeting up at our parents house which is a 3 bed terrace house. 2 doubles, one single. I still live at home (I’m the youngest) and live in the second double (upgraded from the shoe box room when my sister moved out earlier this year), our parents in the other.
My sister hasn’t seen us a lot this year because of covid so we’re all excited to see her and her bf.

She has now made a fuss about not coming over because of not having her old room and the double bed in it (which i brought) to sleep on during her two night (max) stay. They live an hour and a half away -60 miles one way.

Is it to much to ask to bring their double air mattress and sleep downstairs for a night or two? Or just take the sofas.
How do other people solve issues of houses being too small to fit bfs/gfs/ extended family over?
I believe this is a bit of embarrassment as well- her bf has never been to our little house and grew up in a big house with his own en-suite and everything. She and her boyfriend are both uni educated as are his family- we aren’t.
I think she feels ashamed by her humble beginnings...

OP posts:
Celestine70 · 19/12/2020 19:24

She moved out, it's your room, your bed. This thread is making me cross. She can stay in a hotel if she's that bothered.

Wheresmykimchi · 19/12/2020 19:26

@Frazzledstar1

Could you not stay at your boyfriends for the night then your sister and I her bf sleep in the double? That’s what I’d do if it’s an option.
RTFT.

Also nobody can travel anywhere now.

BlueThistles · 19/12/2020 19:40

@Frazzledstar1

Could you not stay at your boyfriends for the night then your sister and I her bf sleep in the double? That’s what I’d do if it’s an option.
sure you would... Hmm
Averyyounggrandmaofsix · 19/12/2020 19:43

Ah well every cloud eh?

Getskinnyordietrying · 19/12/2020 19:53

No way would I let my sibling’s partner sleep in my bed. COVID or no COVID no amount of cleaning would remove the ick factor

StoneofDestiny · 19/12/2020 20:22

Your sister and her bf sound like a PITA. They can cope on a sofa a couple of nights - anybody in normal health can. It's ridiculous they expect you to give up your bed for them. Let the. Stay at home and cater for themselves.

Beachhappy · 19/12/2020 20:23

No need to worry now, they shouldn’t be staying over as todays breaking Covid news.

allotmentgardener · 19/12/2020 21:30

rather a moot point now eigh?

DilyteGelyte · 19/12/2020 21:30

I think I personally would offer my room (her ex room) to her, because it's just nice to be nice. But it's not unreasonable to also ask her to try and fit in a single room or have him on the couch.
It's your room now with your personal belongings etc etc, you have the right to stay in your own room.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 19/12/2020 21:32

I am loving that it's the sister's bedroom because it was her bedroom previously.

I used to share my parents bedroom with my sister. I cannot wait to kick them out next time I visit as its my bedroom.

threatmatrix · 19/12/2020 21:39

Isn’t it easier for one person (you) to take the sofa for two nights so two people can have a bed?

AppleJane · 19/12/2020 21:47

It was the OP and her bf versus the sister with her bf but it kinda doesn't matter now.

Turned out the sister was happy for her parents to pay her rent but couldn't be arsed to visit them. Then Boris put a final stop to it by cancelling sleep overs.

MRC20 · 19/12/2020 21:50

You don't have to give up your room if you have a guest. If they're not happy with the sofa or airbed on offer they can make other arrangements. Stand your ground, CF xx

HunterHearstHelmsley · 19/12/2020 21:50

@threatmatrix

Isn’t it easier for one person (you) to take the sofa for two nights so two people can have a bed?
It was OP+boyfriend or sister+boyfriend
Butterymuffin · 19/12/2020 21:58

It takes them an hour and a half to drive 60 miles to you? Is it all B roads? Sounds like they're making a meal of it. It's an easy day trip.

gertiesgoldfishgone · 19/12/2020 22:34

As several posters have said, it is now 24hours Christmas Day only, no overnights and tier 4 is no meeting up at all and no travel - problem solved!

Mamanyt · 20/12/2020 01:04

In my home, we give up beds to guests. That's just the was it is. And only for one night? Of course, you are free to tell her, in her boyfriend's presence, "Oh, of course you get my bed! You are a guest, after all." DO emphasize "my."

Original poster
Helpneededbyanoutsider · 20/12/2020 12:03

@gertiesgoldfishgone

As several posters have said, it is now 24hours Christmas Day only, no overnights and tier 4 is no meeting up at all and no travel - problem solved!
Yep, problem solved
OP posts:
momtoboys · 21/12/2020 14:04

I'll bet this is very upsetting for your parents. I'm absolutely not saying you are being unreasonable but you could be the bigger person here and let them have the room since they traveled from out of town. It will feel better than battling with a resentful sister for the holiday.

BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze · 21/12/2020 15:42

Yep, problem solved

Every cloud and all that. 🤣

New posts on this thread. Refresh page