To worry about DS?

[sazzysazz337]

Ds was 1 last Friday and still no talking.

He doesn’t point to things, he was clapping and waving at around 7/8 months but has stopped. He doesn’t give you objects unless you hold your hand out to him.
He has been cruising since 9/10 months and can now take a few steps on his own. His eye contact is good and he’s always babbling. He will also copy behaviour like making noises with your hand and mouth but it seems once he’s found that he can do something he stops after a while. He’s very curious and is always playing.

I know not pointing etc is a sign of autism and I’m so worried.

He sounds fine! Just enjoy each stage; they all develop at different speeds and in different ways.

”He has been cruising since 9/10 months and can now take a few steps on his own. His eye contact is good and he’s always babbling. He will also copy behaviour like making noises with your hand and mouth but it seems once he’s found that he can do something he stops after a while. He’s very curious and is always playing”

He sounds just fine from your description op.
Keep an eye on his development over the next couple of months and if you’re worried speak to a healthcare professional to ease your mind. But from everything you’ve said I’d say he sounds like a completely normal baby.

It's so difficult OP. Rationally there's no point worrying at this stage. There's so much variation in development and he doesn't sound like he's varying much from average that in all likelihood it'll be fine. I wasted so much time worrying about DC's development and both are absolutely fine.

Obviously in a year's time if he still isn't talking and is missing other signiciant milestones it'll be time to act. In the mean time. Try some sign language, or look at a book like 'it takes two to talk' if you're still worried but ultimately try to relax a bit.

I know it’s early to worry, but it’s such a stress. I keep feeling so disconnected and I am sick with worry. He responds and looks when I point to things, he knows his name but ignores me some times, he doesn’t seem to even know I exist when he’s playing. He will never bring me an object unless I ask for it. He won’t wave anymore and when I say where’s your shoes he just laughs and smiles at me. I’m sorry it’s so silly sounding he is my first baby and I thought he was so advanced with walking but I never stopped to think of anything else.

My now 5 year old didnt speak a word until he was 2, never pointed at things, didn't wave, liked playing on his own. After 2 he suddenly had a language explosion, was (and still is) highly articulate, and wanted to ask about everything. He was also an early walker.

My now 3 year old started talking and walking at 1, and picked up words/numbers at amazing speed. Wonderful, I had been so worried about my eldest, it was great having a child who hit all the milstones on time.

Two years later, its the younger one who's showing greater flags for autism. It wasn't that he didn't start talking, his communication abilities regressed. He will repeat times tables to you, but if he wants something he'll never ask or point, he'll just drag your hand to what he wants. Breaks my heart a bit, but he's a wonderful little boy who will be just fine whatever the future holds.

I'm not saying any of this to worry you, it's just that honestly at 1, what you describe is definitely within the realms of 'normal'. No two children are the same, and what can seem worrying at 1, could be totally laughed off by 2. And most of the time it is something that changes for the better.

It’s so worrying isn’t it. He doesn’t seem to really play properly either just puts things in a basket and takes them out again.

There’s something niggling me that there’s something not right but I don’t know what it is.

He doesn’t seem to really play properly either just puts things in a basket and takes them out again.

This is exactly what 1 year olds do, op. They are exploring the world and figuring out how things work. Everything you've written sounds completely normal to me.

@sazzysazz337

It’s so worrying isn’t it. He doesn’t seem to really play properly either just puts things in a basket and takes them out again.

There’s something niggling me that there’s something not right but I don’t know what it is.

If you look for issues, you'll find them. Is there any history of autism in your family? Even undiagnosed? Again though, your child has just turned 1 - there's a reason why HV and similar dont really consider looking at autism as a possibility until after 2 at least.

There's nothing there that sounds particularly worrying. It's particularly difficult at the moment - normally you would be able to go along to baby groups and see other mums and other similarly-aged babies, and see that they're all doing things at different rates, and there are plenty of others not talking. Mine cruised quite early, but walked late, so it's not even consistent for similar skills.

There’s a lot of autism and behavioural problems on his dads side but none on mine

I really wouldn't worry, he sounds fine! Its common for a baby to drop one skill if focusing on perfecting a new one. If he is on the cusp of walking that may be why his other skills have either not developed any more or seem to have totally disappeared.

I just think there’s something. I don’t know why.

If my mum or his dad say “where’s mama” etc he just laughs. It’s like he doesn’t know who we are.

It’s mostly the fact if he’s engrossed in something and I call his name he just ignores it. Everything else gets blanked out.

My 18 month old doesnt speak.. he understands loads and communicates with pointing and grunting, im not worried. My older son was same and doesn't stop talking now

I’m gonna give my HV a call because it’s niggling. I have health anxiety anyway so I’d prefer it to be addressed. Hopefully she’ll make an appointment to see him

I cannot seem to settle tonight. I feel so so anxious. He is showing signs already and I don’t know what to do. Do I take him to the GP? Or do I just wait.

Your GP is unlikely to do anything at such a young age but if you are really worried you can enrol with this project in the US (they work with people around the world) med.fsu.edu/autisminstitute/first-wordsr-project It is free and I found them very helpful.

His personal social skills, fine motor and gross motor are perfect. But communication is next to nothing, I don’t know if it’s because I am quiet as a person. But I struggle to play with him as he gives nothing back, if I show him pictures in a book he takes the book to throw it, if I try to build stuff he just pulls the blocks and uses them himself. He doesn’t ever offer me anything unless I gesture my hand and I find myself just watching him because he makes no effort to communicate.

He laughs at me and shouts “a!” If I say mama or dada and he will repeat “a” back and forth with me but that’s it. I don’t know what to do. His HV is phoning me tomorrow. He has a taster day in nursery but I don’t want to take him as hell be miles behind the other one year olds regarding communication.

If you're not talking to him, just watching him, how is it you think he will learn to communicate? Or develop an interest in communicating?

He has a taster day in nursery but I don’t want to take him as hell be miles behind the other one year olds regarding communication.

Again, this is back to front. How will he develop if you withhold the stimuli he needs to develop?

I think your own anxiety and how it affects your behaviour is the issue here, not your son. In the nicest way possible, you need support for yourself and to address your own behaviour.

All babies develop at different rates.

Ie. Some focus on their gross motor over their speech, so some are walking at 9-10 months, bit can't say mama. Some can say mama, dada, Nana at 10 months, but can't crawl. Some will be able to pick up a pea at 7 months, but won't be able to roll over.

Your baby's okay sounds perfectly normal. They're learning about how objects interact with each other. He probably likes banging things together too? Also, he'll probably enjoy things like peekaboo and looking for objects covered by a cup, all reinforcing object permanence.

Please don't fret.

If you're worried he isn't responding to his name when focusing on something or at other times....get his hearing checked.

Of he's responding to you when you say Mama etc then that's great! He's communicating with you and responding...that's talking :)

Take him to the taster day, a d you'll see he isn't miles behind. A d even if he is, he'll catch up and I'll guarantee he's 'miles ahead' on another area of development eg gross motor or fine motor

He just laughs when I say mama or shouts “AH!”

His hearings fine thank god he could hear a fart down the m62 haha.

He will look at me if I say his name but if he’s engrossed in a toy or watching something he won’t. I don’t necessarily think that’s ASD as he ignores most commands like no or anything.

He understands words I think but as for speaking it’s not happening. I know I am anxious and when I do speak he genuinely does just ignore me and focuses on his playing so it mostly does end up me watching him. I’ve tried reading to him and he just gets bored.

Also hates going in shops which I’m maybe thinking is the bright lights, however he is okay in the sun and lights at home so not sure.

I know animal noises is one of the things for 12 month olds. If I say woof woof or moo he just laughs he doesn’t attempt to do it back. He laughs at peekaboo but won’t do it. He smiles and babbles at strangers but won’t wave. Are they signs of ASD?