Urgent Help I don't know what to do AIBU?

[NamechangedforAIBU]

I've name changed because my post is very outing and I don't want my SIL who is on here and my best 2 friends in the entire world who know my username on here to find out.
So what do I do, AIBU or is it ok?
Please be gentle with me, I've been awake all night not sure what to do and written a list of the for's and against and since cannot decide.
I just cannot ask my family or my work colleagues I'm working from home and feel a bit distant from them all the closeness at work has gone and we haven't seen each other in months. I really cannot bear asking my 2 best friends they won't judge me but it will make a difference to our friendship.
So I'm at the mercy of MN. Yes I know some will flame and some will be cruel and mean but there are people on here that will also be kind and helpful so hoping that one of those can help me out?
Thanks in advance

WHEN SOMEONE TELLS YOU ANYTHING AT ALL, BELIEVE THEM!!!

No is a complete sentence.

@Alexandernevermind

I think I've had a sense of humour bypass this morning.

Nah you haven't, it's just not funny

Okay,

You need to go to the police
And Social services
And the school
And the Environment agency.

HTH

You OK, hun?

Grey rock, OP.

And of course they should have been wearing a mask.

This is a stealth boast isn't it?

Look you are totally unreasonable to post unless you are prepared to act on all the advice given immediately even if it is contradictory.

My advice is to stop eating carbs, ditch the loo brush and insist everyone takes their shoes off.

That's not a 30 week baby rolling in your stomach, OP. Don't be ridiculous, you've got wind.

You sound like hard work OP!

Washing your bedding and towels three times a day should sort you out .

CANCEL CHRISTMAS

Everyone is a narcissist.

It’s because it’s not organic.

Do you have a bathroom bin OP?

Has no one yet suggested you get a Nanny? (For your cats if you want...)

Or maybe Piglet John knows the answer...

Could you take in some ironing or sell some things on Ebay?

Did you find pants down the side of the sofa????

He's definitely cheating on you. Probably shagging right now. But don't snoop, that's an invasion of his trust.

Crying of laughter here, shaking with tears running down my face - hubby asked if I was okay and I had to pretend to be sneezing!!!! 😂

Well I would say the same if you served ME trifle made with jelly, tbh.

Is this a reverse? I get at least a months worth of meals from a standard chicken.

It must have been the MIL she's a witch

@TinkersRucksack only a months worth?! You’re doing something wrong there, it should be lasting you 3 minimum. Snowflakes of today wasting food all Willy nilly.