To be overwhelmed at this level of extended breastfeeding?

[ThornAmongstRoses]

I belong to a FB group for extended breast feeders (from when I was breastfeeding my 3 year old) and a thread just popped up on my newsfeed where a woman was celebrating her daughter’s 6th birthday and saying how she still breast fed her.

As I read the comments they were all lovely and supportive and other women came forward saying they were still feeding their 8, 9, 10 year olds (and some even older).

I won’t lie - I was surprised that breastfeeding continued for that length of time in some families, not that there’s any specific reason why it shouldn’t, but I was genuinely taken aback. I was a bit in awe really of the women who were continuing despite probably feeling it was viewed as something they ‘shouldn’t’ be doing.

When I was breastfeeding my 3 year old my husband would make the odd comment about our son “being too old for that now” so I can’t imagine what he’d have thought if I’d carried on for much longer. I suppose that’s due to the UK’s societal and cultural attitudes towards extended breastfeeding though.

AIBU to be so astonished by this?

Does anyone know anyone who has breastfed for that long or done it themselves?

I would love to understand the reality of it, and learn about the emotions/reasons behind it, and especially how the mothers cope with any negative attitudes they face - of which I imagine most sadly do.

Breastfeeding past the age of 3 is strange. I can’t wrap my brain around it, but to each their own.

Why is it strange?

My son would love to still be breastfed! He’s 5 but his latch definitely started to go aged 3 and he was getting less and less milk so I’m amazed it’s biologically possible.

DS stopped at 3 and he remembers it. For whom is it "fucking weird"? Not me and not DS. So what, precisely, is the problem?

I think there was a court case (perhaps in the US) where a mother was charged with child abuse for breastfeeding an 8 year old. That fits in with the ‘memory’ age bracket

You are astonished that some people think breastfeeding a ten year old is wrong ! I’d be astonished if anyone thought that was ok it’s definitely not ok UABVVU

@Hilda40

If a child can remember being breastfed in later life then it's fucking weird.

well said

DS stopped at 2 and he is 5 now but can remember being breastfed. I don't think that's weird.

My immediate reaction was that is wrong and then I thought of all the people who thought it was wrong that I was still feeding a 3 year old and I felt ashamed for being judgmental.

My youngest can remember breastfeeding- she was 5 and a half when she stopped and the memories are all happy I'm so glad she can.

She also also sad still about weaninf but she stopped slowly on her own terms ans has lost some baby teeth now

when a child is old enough to ask for his food, let alone hold a spoon, then yes, it feels wrong.

It's odd, but I can't get excited about it - their lives, their business!

What cultures do children breastfeed until they are 8-10

When this subject comes up it’s always quoted that in many culture it’s normal to breastfeed children until they past being toddlers

Yes 8 is too old I know some women really struggle giving up breastfeeding so do wonder if it’s only for the child’s benefit

I'm on that page and I think you've misinterpreted some of what the women have said. I saw 2 or 3 that were still feeding 8 year olds but no one has said they were feeding older than that, that I could see. Some have said that they have "been feeding for 10 years" but they meant in total, across 2 or 3 children... not one child.

Depends what your priorities are. I breastfed for 30 months before I got fed up because it prevented me losing weight and was spoiling the look of my boobs. I doubt that mothers in third world countries care what their boobs look like.

It's each mother and child's personal choice. Breastfeeding is natural not weird

Why would a child aged 8 or 10 need to be breastfed at that age, surely they would be getting nutritional requirements from other sources of food and drinks?

What makes it ‘weird’ if they can remember it?

Other than ingrained cultural norms in the UK that is?

I’d have thought being physically able to at the stage of adult teeth and as old as 8 is extremely unusual.

My 4 year old has just started self weaning. I have very mixed feelings xx

@Shadowboy

Breastfeeding at 10 is a bit much. The following year they are in secondary school. Can you imagine discussing it with friends?

Yes about to go through puberty and secondary school, My eldest weaned of at 2 and a half but changed to playing with my hair to soothe himself to sleep. My other DS I weaned at 1 as I fell pregnant with my DD and weaned her at 8 months as I had to have surgery and she hated bottles so needed to prepare her.

This reminds me of a story I read where a woman was looking for a divorce from her husband on the grounds that she caught his mother breastfeeding him. Ten and older is verging into odd territory.

Yes totally agree on this so called memory test by the way. Not strange for me or my son to feed at 3 and wouldn’t remotely care if others had an issue with it.

I also co slept with mine, I think because my BF had a cot death and it made me anxious so wanted them with me.

What's weird is women (presumably) criticising other women and saying feeding their children using the tools which were made for that purpose is wrong.

I can see a couple of oldies on this thread @ShowOfHands can you remember the name of the MNer who went onto GMTV to sort that ignorant man out? His attitude was a bit "ooh titties are only for babies till they're 6months then they should revert back to being sex objects for the menz"