Would doing this make my dd a bit spoilt?

[Maisymooster]

Last night dd was out and her phone must have fallen out of her pocket. She arrived back absolutely distraught. We managed to track it on the find my I phone thing and her dad collected it from the street! It was smashed in 1 corner but now doesn't work. I haven't yet inspected it but the extra annoying thing is we were going to surprise her for Christmas with an upgrade.
So my dilemma now, do we pay for a repair or upgrade the phone now earlier than planned?
Her current phone until it smashed last night is an i phone 11 and I wanted to sell it to recoup some costs back from upgrading. So it would need fixing if I did that. But I have no idea the cost of fixing it versus what I'd get for selling it.
But if we just upgrade immediately, not only does it completely ruin the surprise on Christmas day (and her sibling would get a surprise too when she'd already had hers) It would also seem like the wrong message to send to her as she was obviously careless. Like showing her don't worry sweetie, you've smashed your phone here's a better one to replace it with! Wwyd?

RJ It's what she wanted, that's why. We'll happily upgrade again next year if she starts using it more or wants access to features she can't currently.

Could you buy her a £20/£50 basic phone that partly comes out of her pocket money til Christmas? Always good to have a basic spare in case of situations like this.

She already has an 11?!? How old is she?

Why isn’t she paying for the repair? She’s the one who smashed it. You paying does not teach her to be careful with her things. It teaches her that Mummy will always sort it out.

If the iPhone 11 wasn’t relevant then why mention it in the first place. Yes. Your daughter is spoiled. Sounds like the damage has already been done.

You are asking if your dd is spoilt - she has an iphone 11 - go figure🤣🤣🤣.
Seriously though OP, get it fixed and don’t ruin the surprise....but maybe explain that dd must pay cost of repairs?...even if they have to pay you this through chores leading up to xmas? Might make them more careful...

There isn’t one material possession that will make a kid spoilt. Being spoilt is an attitude - if a child is appreciative of what they have, the actual possession/s and prices themselves are all relative. She sounds like a nice kid who had an accident and was upset about it. Absolutely nothing to suggest she’s spoilt.

So you’ll upgrade and it’s fine if your dd wants when she wants but it’s not if the ops daughter wants for Xmas? I don’t follow any of the logic in that sorry.

Wait until Christmas.

No reason you can't get a cheap PAYG if she needs one and keep it as family phone for emergencies.

Then invest in screen protector and proper case. I have that as I've also dropped my phone or it's fell from my pocket. It not necessarily carelessness.

iPhone 11 and getting an upgrade for Christmas all sounds very swish... but anyway, I think you're more asking about the general principle of fixing her mistake and then soon afterwards giving her something even better.

I'd say It depends on the child. If she generally takes good care of her things, appreciates their value, and this is a one off, then I'd probably see if there's a cheap fix. If she has a history of being careless then there is absolutely no way I'd fix it. You can buy mobile phones very cheaply these days, and she could make do with one of those.

Perhaps she should be paying to get it fixed as she broke it?

If she’s not normally careless then I’d fix it and get the upgrade.

Everyone is so set on punishment when someone makes a mistake. It was an accident. Unless she’s done it multiple times already I don’t see the need to be so harsh.

Losing something ONCE doesn't make you careless.

Having something expensive doesn't make you spoilt.

Spoilt is an attitude - if the daughter was spoilt she would have not be worried about losing the phone and demanded mum ordered her a new one!!

@Balaur

You're overthinking. It's not giving her the message of "it's ok sweetie here's a better phone" if you were planning on giving her a new one anyway?! Just get the old one fixed, since you were planning to sell it, then give her the new one at Christmas, no-one's surprise ruined, no-one "spoiled". You can get an iPhone screen fixed for around £25. DS has broken his twice, just accidents.

Where? My sons iPhone 8 screen has some minor hairline cracks, I went into the local repair school and they wanted a flat rate of £189+VAT

The other day (Thursday I think?) it was in the news that if everyone replaced their phones after 4 years instead of the average which is 2, we would save loads in terms of carbon emissions etc. The iPhone 11 is still really quite new! Why on earth (literally) would you be upgrading it already?

@Blimeyoreilly2020

You are asking if your dd is spoilt - she has an iphone 11 - go figure🤣🤣🤣. Seriously though OP, get it fixed and don’t ruin the surprise....but maybe explain that dd must pay cost of repairs?...even if they have to pay you this through chores leading up to xmas? Might make them more careful...

Having a iPhone 11 as a child doesn’t make someone spoilt... a child is allowed nice things if the parents can afford them.

@ScrapThatThen

Well it would be ridiculous to repair a phone you are about to replace.

Not when the thing that is being replaced is worth hundreds of pounds and the cost of the gift is the cost of making the swap not the cost of the new item.

OP, seeing as you need to repair the phone to sell it, providing that it's economic to repair,the sensible option would be to get it repaired and wait until Christmas to give the new one.

A couple of days without her phone will focus her mind about being more careful, and it sounds like a decent phone case for her new one would be a good use of any Christmas money she gets.

Yes you have spoilt her. I would love her iPhone 11 I don't have enough money so I don't have one.
Even considering repairing it and giving it back to her is appalling.

How old is she OP?

A bit spoilt? Umm, more than a bit!

Where’ve you gone OP? Why aren’t you telling us how old DD is?

RJ Seeing as you ask. A 6s is

If you’re upgrading iPhone 11s for children , I’d stop worrying about creating spoilt little madams 😂

@PurpleFlower1983

To answer your question though, Apple repairs are very expensive - direct through them a smashed screen alone is about £240 so not working will be more. A third party might sort it cheaper but you’ll likely be looking at at least a couple of hundred.

Via a booth type place is much cheaper- around£50

@ScrapThatThen

Well it would be ridiculous to repair a phone you are about to replace.

No it's not, that doesn't make any sense, you'd waste a phone you could sell for £500 for the sake of a repair that costs £100 (made up figures). You dont think anyone throws away an iPhone 11 when they upgrade do you?

@Tootsietootie

Yes you have spoilt her. I would love her iPhone 11 I don't have enough money so I don't have one. Even considering repairing it and giving it back to her is appalling.

So because you can’t afford nice things everyone that has a better phone then you is also spoiled going by your logic😂