Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for your useless DH stories?

186 replies

Bananapancakes0 · 02/12/2020 19:22

So I spent a couple of weeks making over our bathroom. Painted the tiles (it took 4 coats), the floor, the walls, put up new cabinets, towel rails and accessories.

Dh dyed his hair last night and then showered it off. He failed to notice that all the gleaming Bright white tiles were covered in dark, dark brown hair dye. I just had my shower now, pulled back the curtain and wanted to cry.

How can that not be noticed? Thankfully I was able to get it off with some flash but not before panicking about all my hard work ruined in 2 minutes flat. Just silently raging here.

Please make me feel better with your equally incompetent stories. I hate having to be the 'man' and the woman, it's like having an extra child.

Its not really an aibu just shamelessly posting for traffic.

OP posts:
PamDemic · 03/12/2020 16:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CoconutGrove · 03/12/2020 16:48

A friend's dh got her to carry the baby car seat out of the hospital after her C section and then buggered off hiking for 2 days leaving her to cope alone. They are still together years later. My friend has quite sexist ideas about men not being able to help being stroppy/selfish whereas she judges women quite harshly.

Vallmo47 · 03/12/2020 16:49

This was quite a few years ago now but it’s a classic DH fail moment.

Parents to toddler potty training, which is key to story.
Our son would need potty in night so we’d keep the potty in his room ready in case he needed a sit down wee in the night. (He was a very tidy boy, who’d sit down on the potty rather than Make a huge mess like some boys).

Dh asks to go out with friends for a night off. I agree and do all the usual bedtime routines etc. Go to bed, fall asleep, Dh still out.
Wake up, can hear splashing that sounds like a man is pissing, but the sound does not remind me of when piss hits the toilet bowl. Intrigued, I get up to investigate this noise.

There’s DH, pissing in my son’s potty and splashing piss all over our off white carpets. He’s gone past two perfectly open and useable bathrooms, to enter our toddler son’s room and piss in his potty.

Needless to say, I made him clean. A lot.

CoconutGrove · 03/12/2020 16:52

She's one of those people that if a girl or woman does something bad it's because "Girls/women are bitches" but if a boy bullies etc it's because "kids are horrible" So basically it's girls' fault either way!

DoubleHelix79 · 03/12/2020 17:10

DH is very far from useless (if anything i have a more slapdash attitude to housework etc) but on the occasion of our wedding he was in charge of ordering the food. We'd kept it small and simple and other than some general input at the beginning I'd left him to it. Turns out he hadn't ordered any dessert. At all. (We hadn't bothered with a formal wedding cake) I have a sweet tooth and was very much not amused. Luckily it was also my birthday and a friend had happened to bake me a cake. We cut that up, added some strawberries intended for breakfast the next day and served it up. I will never let him forget Smile

Original poster
Bananapancakes0 · 03/12/2020 17:21

I don't know how much longer I can put up with this. Another day, another incident, though this one is just dangerous.

Had a bath with dd2 and ds1. We got them out and dried them on our bed. Dh pulled the tab on ds nappy too far and it snapped so he said he would take him down stairs. He opens the stair gate at the top and closes it, except he doesn't. Dd tried to follow him after a few seconds and leaned on the gate. She would have fallen head first through it and down the stairs if it wasn't for a stack of boxes of toys that are waiting to be donated at the top that the gate got caught on.

I didn't say anything about the paint beyond making him aware but I've just had a massive go about this. He said he closed it and didn't know, he wouldn't do it on purpose, why am I being arsey with him etc.

Just sick.

OP posts:
Tangledtresses · 03/12/2020 17:21

All of these stories are EXACTLY why I choose to be single! But with two son's who can cook use a washing machine and have some awareness and empathy!!

These threads give me the rage..., I just don't understand why women put up with this crap?

Tangledtresses · 03/12/2020 17:22

Drop the ball people!!

grassisjeweled · 03/12/2020 17:37

Drop the ball people!!

^

Good point. I've started to simply not do laundry - it's only taken 10 years but with DH, the penny's finally dropped. 'Oh, I don't have any clean underwear?'

No shit, sherlock.

EscapeTheCastle · 03/12/2020 18:03

My Dh once used a spray can of Raid to polish the dining room table. I was not impressed.

Wheresmykimchi · 03/12/2020 18:07

I do laugh at these but for all the man bashing that goes on regularly (not you OP), could you imagine it ever being acceptable for men to post stuff like this?

Sn0tnose · 03/12/2020 18:22

I do laugh at these but for all the man bashing that goes on regularly (not you OP), could you imagine it ever being acceptable for men to post stuff like this? I’d be all for a post with men complaining about how their female partners and wives didn’t pull their weight in the running of the home or the caring of their children.

Out of interest, how many men do you think would be able to post on a thread like that?

Original poster
Bananapancakes0 · 03/12/2020 18:34

@Pumpertrumper that is exactly us. We never had a cross word before kids and I was happy with our roles in the relationship but you're right; kids change everything.

Well, actually kids changed me, still waiting for him to bloody catch up and get with the programme.

OP posts:
Ohalrightthen · 03/12/2020 18:35

@Wheresmykimchi

I do laugh at these but for all the man bashing that goes on regularly (not you OP), could you imagine it ever being acceptable for men to post stuff like this?
In a world where women regularly abdicated all domestic and family responsibility to their husbands and acted utterly helpless when asked to contribute once in a blue moon, it would be absolutely acceptable for a man to start a thread like this.

That world doesn't sound like this one though.

Fr0thandBubble · 03/12/2020 18:36

@Sn0tnose Bingo!

Brainwave89 · 03/12/2020 18:40

@Fr0thandBubble

Why *@Brainwave89*? Because men shouldn't be expected to do housework, just like women shouldn't be expected to do car maintenance and DIY Hmm ? The issue is that most women now hold their own in terms of working and bringing home the bacon but still seem to end up doing all the "wife work". Most men have not nearly stepped up in terms of "wife work" in the same way. This is why it is so frustrating.

And if women were doing the bone-headed things people have posted about on here, it would be fair game if men posted about it. But frankly, you don't hear about hopeless women doing these idiotic things, do you? And there's a reason for that!

My husband does plenty of housework thanks and he is good at it as well. I simply do not agree with women rubbishing men as I would never tolerate men rubbishing women. As for wife work. In 2020 really?
Fr0thandBubble · 03/12/2020 18:50

@brainwave89 Duh note the inverted commas Hmm. My whole point is that there should be no defined roles between men and women.

And good for you for having a non-hopeless husband - but for those of us who do have one, why shouldn't we be able to vent? Just the same way we might vent about anything Confused?

willitbetonight · 03/12/2020 19:31

My husband does shit because I'm sometimes a crap wife. Keep him on his toes!

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 03/12/2020 19:33

Really? How about we start a thread of useless wife stories?

Thought not.

Shortfeet · 03/12/2020 19:39

Let's have some useless DW stories

willitbetonight · 03/12/2020 19:40

@Fivebyfive2 I was sure I was going to read he had hoovered up the hamster!

Wheresmykimchi · 03/12/2020 19:40

@LadyTiredWinterBottom2

Really? How about we start a thread of useless wife stories?

Thought not.

Agreed.

But apparently as I www told this would never happen because women are never incompetent.

Original poster
Bananapancakes0 · 03/12/2020 20:23

I didn't start this thread to be labelled a man bashing idiot. Quite obviously lots of you have husbands who are capable and manage to function within your household. Congratulations.

I asked for DH stories because this is mumsnet, primarily a site for women. The majority of women are straight so would have boyfriends/ husbands so it's not much of a reach to give the thread the title it has.

If you read my opening post it's not a general attack on men, I haven't been horrible to my dh, I've explained that. How many of you can say you've never spoke to a friend about your partner or had a rant when you could have kept your cool?

Thank you to the posters who have experience of what I'm describing, it does make me feel like less of an idiot.

OP posts:
Fivebyfive2 · 03/12/2020 20:37

@Bananapancakes0, I saw on a previous post you think your dh may have dyspraxia. My dh has that, he was diagnosed as a teenager. Feel free to pm me if you want to chat.

mummmy2017 · 03/12/2020 20:39

Today I deliberately left the house early, so my OH had to put the shopping away.
I said I had forgotten it was being delivered today, and it was loads of frozen stuff.

Swipe left for the next trending thread