Drink Driving

[Kit0069]

I have just reported my wife, whom I love very much, for drink driving. I am broken hearted. Understandable she hates for what I have done as she will lose her job and faces a prison sentence. Was I right to do this and destroy my life with her.

I’m sorry your wife has put you in this position. She has no right to be angry with you. You’ve done the right thing- she could kill someone or herself.

What are the circumstances? Has she been driving this morning after a heavy night, or is she an alcoholic?

And it doesn’t have to mean you’ve destroyed your life together. If you have a strong relationship you can work through this (even if she does go to prison). I know someone who’s wife was an alcoholic and crashed their car (thankfully no one was hurt). She had a spell in prison, finally got sober and they are still together 5 years later. It was what she needed to finally help her about 10 years of being a functioning alcoholic

You did the right thing

I'm so sorry you're going through this.
Drink driving is never acceptable.
Your wife put herself and others at risk - you protected them by reporting your wife. Hard as that is it was the right thing to do.

You did the right thing.

Yes. Drink drivers kill people and destroy families.

I hope the consequences are severe.

Sounds harsh but better her life is destroyed than someone else's if she kills someone.

She's an alcoholic. I have tried everything I could to stop he drink driving but she drives from home sober and drinks when she is parked up. I've not helped as I've struggled to deal with her drinking at home so I've driven the drinking underground.

I understand but my burden of guilt is unbearable. I've hurt the person I love the most in the world.

I reported my now exh.
I filed for divorce the same week.
No regrets.

Have the police caught her in the act?
You absolutely did the right thing

You may have saved her life and those of others.

Totally the right thing to do.

Has she been charged with drink driving before? if not she is unlikely to receive a prison sentence unless she blew over 100 on the breathalyser and even then she is likely to receive a suspended sentence. She is also likely to receive a requirement to attend alcohol awareness support such as Swanswell or Turning Point. It may be the thing that finally turns her life around. You did the right thing and be glad that nobody got hurt.

You hurt her? Nope. She's hurting herself and you're holding her accountable before she hurts other people by drink driving. She's hurting you by forcing you to be complicit in her alcoholism and breaking the law. I don't see how you're hurting her in this scenario at all. You pissed her off, is all.

Op,think of it this way,if you will,you have potentially saved her life and the lives of other people.
I am assuming from your post,you have given details of her name,car and where she goes so the police might catch her.
This may also give her the wake up call she needs to address her problem with drink.if she is arrested and takes steps before the court date to stop drinking and seek professional help she might avoid a jail sentence.
She is risking so much by drink driving.I've seen babies cut to shreds by drink driivers.
You've done the best thing.

I assume you reported and she was caught by the police?

100% think you have done the right thing, but you have probably distroyed your relationship.

Do you have kids together?

I have tried everything I could to stop he drink driving but she drives from home sober and drinks when she is parked up

And then drives home drunk?

Could you have taken her keys away? She needs all the help and support you can give her. Yes, drink driving is abhorrent. Could it have been avoided with a little more thought? I don't know your situation but think that's what I would have done.

You haven't hurt her, she brought this to the door and the consequences of an accident whilst drink driving would be far worse.

My friend was caught drink driving, she didnt go to prison, think it was a 6 month ban but she shouldn't be drink driving.

You can't help someone who doesnt want to help themselves.

She doesn't want help, so you can't help her unfortunately. Until she accepts she has a problem, you can't help her. You did the right thing.

Although it sounds harsh, your wife has a problem and this hopefully will be a wake up call. I think you did the right thing. I hope to God that she gets the help she needs maybe some rehab. Feel for you mate.

You did a very brave thing. As a person that has lost a close family member to a drunk driver I thank you.

Sorry to be hard but she deserves it. Would you rather have guilt over shopping your wife to the police, or allowing her to continue drink driving and kill a family. That’s what it comes down to. Her selfishness and addiction or innocent people.

If she had killed someone could you have lived with the guilt of knowing you could have prevented it from happening? She will be furious with you but it’s all part of the addiction not taking responsibility for her actions. It might be a wake up call it might not it’s up to her not you. I’ve seen alcoholism in my own family please don’t be hard on yourself.