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AIBU?

Dh's dancing face...how to get over this?

197 replies

FortunesFave · 28/11/2020 10:08

When DH dances, he pulls this face which I find deeply unattractive.

There. I know you're all going to tell me I'm a cow...but the thing is, it's a face which is almost EXACTLY the same face an ex used to pull when HE danced!

It's so annoying and off-putting for that reason!

The ex was a complete dickhead so I have bad memories attached to it. DH doesn't look like the ex but there's a sort of passing resemblance and this face is SO similar to the one ex did that it's uncanny.

It's a sort of close mouthed smile with half shut eyes.

I HATE it.

He dances AT me with this face and I always shut him down which is awful of me...how can I get over the association? I really want to stop associating this with my ex...

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

467 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
53%
You are NOT being unreasonable
47%
Ddot · 29/11/2020 19:46

Poor hubby but must admit it's a good thread. 🤣

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Ravenesque · 29/11/2020 19:57

Of no help to you but years ago a friend and I had gone to a very small club type place with two blokes and dancing ensued. We were utterly hammered drunk but even so the shame when these guys started dancing was just too much. I ran away and locked myself in the toilet, next thing I hear her banging on the door to let her in because she wanted to hide too. Obviously, this was a stupid and pretty immature* thing to do but they were so beyond awful and there wasn't enough drink in the world to cover the horror of having to dance anywhere near them.

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motorcyclenumptiness · 29/11/2020 20:15

Line dancing? When the rhythm takes him just pop on a Stetson and start grapevining. He can gurn await to his heart's content and you never need to see it again. Job's a good un.

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Byebye1to1 · 29/11/2020 20:23

Not read all the threads but many comments seem fairly typically derogatory towards males. The kind of, ‘Oh it’s ok cuz he’s only a man’. I wouldn’t ever dream of writing such comments about my wife and describing how deeply unattractive she was when dancing and approaching me. Bizarre. Nor do I think many other men would. I feel hugely self conscious as a male and in a dancing environment. I’ve only probably danced with my wife about 4 times in 24 years (including wedding) owing to self conscious feelings. Glad I don’t if this is how I may be judged.

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Ddot · 29/11/2020 21:05

Not long after i started dating my man, I went out with some friends, not him. Picture this, me dancing with male friend, suddenly he rose in the air and levitated to the side. Not understanding as I must admit I'd had a few gins. I then realized my man was standing in front of me. He had lifted my friend up and moved him. Bless him. DJ thought it was hilarious. I thought it was romantic

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CheeseAndOnionIcecream · 29/11/2020 21:34

Well at least it sounds like he can actually dance! My exH couldn't dance to save his life and quite frankly,it was embarrassing. I used to find an excuse to leave the room if he got up to dance. Grin

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Celestine70 · 29/11/2020 22:22

The face sounds awful, sort of naff and creepy.

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Macieb · 29/11/2020 22:47

Hahahahahahahahahahahshshssssaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahhaahhahaaaaa so funny!

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Zipperdidoodaa · 30/11/2020 02:20

Totally off topic but Caroline Quentin had this weird face she put on for the dance she did in the week she left Strictly - I think it was supposed to be sassy but it was unbelievably ugly. I couldn't watch her after a while - it kind of looked like she had her chin jutting out and her tongue pushed into it.
I came on to say exactly this - weird and very off putting. She almost deserved to be sent home just for the face pulling!

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lottiegarbanzo · 30/11/2020 10:01

Oh come on, the people taking this too seriously. This is not about mocking someone for dancing.

The DH is deliberately putting on a 'look' when he dances - because he thinks (or once though but has long since forgotten) that it looks cool, or alluring, or conveys that he's engrossed in the music, or something.

The OP's problem isn't even that. It's only that this 'look' reminds her of her ex.

Can you really not imagine an instance where a partner does something, says something, or has a little mannerism that reminds you of an ex? That that might make startle you a little, make you uncomfortable for a brief moment?

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Ddot · 30/11/2020 10:51

Yes

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FortunesFave · 30/11/2020 11:14

I think it was supposed to be sassy but it was unbelievably ugly

No...she was going for comedy but it was just too weird to be funny!

OP posts:
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RUOKHon · 30/11/2020 11:16

Oh dear, are you getting the Ick OP?

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scrappydappydoooooo · 30/11/2020 11:18

@MrsRogerLima

Picturing this op. It's OK Melania, you can divorce him soon 😂

OMFG!!!!!!! This thread was making me picture the stupid faces XH pulled when dancing and this was a constant. Oh God. I actually feel like I need to bleach my vagina now for having had contact with that!
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dirtyprancing · 06/12/2020 00:06

So I haven't rtft but has anyone mentioned coke/drugs? 🙈 my ex used to have a total tell on a night out which could pass for an innocent "drunken quirk"...but he was 3 lines deep in a class A. Totally respectable person until a few " drinks" in. Just an idea? X

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Suitsme · 06/12/2020 00:13

Xmas Grin I love this

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SlipperTripper · 06/12/2020 00:28

My mum does this too, but she smiles into her shoulder (head turned, grinning away). It's highly amusing to watch her - as soon as the music starts, eyes shut, head turns, smile on.

It's such a well known phenomenon to us all, on nights out my friends and I have been known to recreate the 'Mother Grin' to much drunken hilarity, and the utter confusion of everyone around us.

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Merryweather80 · 06/12/2020 10:20

Mine pulls poo face when he sides up to me in the kitchen to dance. 🤣 How attractive!

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Schiehallion · 06/12/2020 19:02

I'm 62 and here's my list of suggestions for Santa -

Moshulu slippers
Jo Malone candle (or good knock off)
Personalised notecards
Kipling backpack
Gel nail polish
Orla Keily watch
Absolut mandarin vodka
Suede gloves
Lindor salted caramel truffles
Val McDermid's latest crime thriller
Tweezerman tweezers
Towelling hair turban
Daniel Craig key ring/calendar/poster
Silver heart earrings
Sea Salt handy band (cotton snood)
Hyacinth bulbs
Donation to the Cyrenians or other homeless charity

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Schiehallion · 06/12/2020 19:03

Oops....

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Merryweather80 · 06/12/2020 20:40

I never say no to a dance with my partner. Poo face or not! He is only doing it jokingly and does a much more normal handsome face after a minute or two.
Amazing how many people have missed the fact that this is a light-hearted thread. I'm sure dads say stuff about us on dads-net all the time about irritating things we do or odd faces we're aware of not aware of pulling.

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MurunB · 06/12/2020 21:46

I noticed recently that I have a dancing face, which seems to be modelled on Zoolander’s “blue steel” look.
I have avoided dancing ever since.

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