My friend is sleeping with a married man

[Isabelle2457]

They've been seeing each other for almost a year.

She knew from the get go that he was married. I tried to talk her out of it at the time but she was adamant that they had a "connection."

This guy is older than her, they work in same office and he is also her senior.

I don't know what to do. She's my friend but I also know his wife to some extent. If it was me, I'd want to know (obviously!) But, I don't want to betray my friend.

Wwyd?

Tell the wife. I’d wanna know!

I’d keep out of it personally. I don’t believe in getting involved in other folks marriages. Although some folks on here will be salivating at the thought of you telling her and what she’s got coming to her.

Don't get involved beyond making sure your friend knows just how badly you think of her for this. To be honest I'd be dropping her PDQ but I can't tell you what to do.

There will be plenty of people on here calling for you to tell the wife and then begging for updates, but if you do decide to go down that road you need to think very carefully first. The messenger always gets shot.

Isn't the usual MN respond that she is doing nothing wrong? It's all the man in the wrong here because he's the married one?

I'm would distance myself from the friend and tell her why. However, I wouldn't tell the wife.

I’d tell the wife.

She’s being fucked over!

Stay out of it. Nothing good will come of involving urself

Unless it was my best friend being cheated on, I would stay out of it.

The messenger is always shot.

I would let your friend know that you do not want to discuss the man or the relationship ever, and leave it at that.

Tell the wife anonymously. With a few details so she knows it is not a lie.

It's up to her wether she acts on it but she deserves to know

Stay well out of it. Why has it taken almost a year to concern you?

I don't judge my friends morals so I would do nothing as it is nothing to do wIth me. I wouldn't hide my own views from a friend but that is different to judging her.

Why do you have to do anything? It's none of your business.

It's none of your business, stay out of it.

Stay out of it but if you feel bad about being her friend just extract yourself from the friendship. and when it all goes tits up she can go crying to someone else.

Distance yourself but don't get involved.. you really don't want to be pulled into the mix!

Stay out of it OP, but let your friend know in no uncertain terms that she’s being an absolute arsehole.

I've tried to stay out of it, but it seems to be becoming more serious.
I guess my conscience has kicked in since I'm now pregnant, and can empathise with the wife - she has a young baby.

Definitely stay out of it- unless you know the wife. What good can come of telling anyone? It's you friend's mess.

Think of it from the wife's side. It's much more humiliating to know everyone else knew and didn't tell you.
Can't believe the amount of replies saying stay out of it. I would want to know.

Would you want to know if you were the wife?

Personally I would but I am also a coward... if I was telling someone who I wasn't close to I would probably write an anonymous letter.

I think she should know. If he is sleeping around he could bring home an std.

@TaraRhu

If you read the original post you will see the OP said:

"I also know his wife to some extent."

I don't know why people always say to stay out of it. If my dp was cheating I would absolutely want anyone to tell me. She'll probably find out eventually anyway but you may save her wasting part of her life on an awful person. Imagine how humiliated you would feel if you found out years later and that people that you know, knew about it all along. Awful.

I would want to know

Dump the friend and stay out of it

It will all go to shit and she will be crying on your shoulder about it. These things never end well.

Another one here for tell her.