Child wants to be vegetarian

[NobodyKnowsTiddlyPom]

A bit of a tough one. My youngest (9) wants to be vegetarian because he doesn’t want to eat animals as it makes him sad. We’ve raised animals for meat all his life but for some reason, seeing the Christmas turkeys in their field on his way to and from school each day is making him really upset.

My problem is that in order to ensure he gets a decent amount of protein and the vitamins/minerals that he currently gets from meat, I’m going to have to do a lot of extra cooking just for him. I have Crohn’s, and so does my eldest, so we can’t eat most beans/pulses and many other foods that are common in a vegetarian diet. Also, none of us can tolerated Quorn!

I will have to cook two separate meals every day in order to accommodate my DS becoming veggie. He grows like a weed and is always on the go so he’s really quite skinny so can’t afford to lose any weight.
I’m not against vegetarianism in the slightest - we’d have veggie meals more often as a family if my DD and I could stomach them. We try to counteract this by eating meat that is either raised by us or ethically sourced.

DH and I work full time so don’t have time to be cooking two separate meals every night. I also suffer with chronic fatigue due to my Crohn’s so generally use the weekends to try and recover from my working week.

AIBU to try and persuade my DS to hold off being veggie until he’s a bit older?

Just give him what you eat but without the meat. That's what my mum did with me and i'm still alive. Although no longer a veggie! As long as he eats plenty of cheese and milk he'll be fine. No need to make a big deal of it, like don't go announcing to everyone that he has become vegetarian! (Because he might feel pressured to stay veggy even when he fancies a bacon butty). And don't comment if he has meat now and then.
Ps, what a lovely kind boy you have, you should be proud of him, bless x

I am in a really similar situation OP, except I have fairly mild IBS and can tolerate beans but not wheat, lentils, aubergines or quorn. Plus a lot of vegetarian sausages etc aren't gluten free. I allowed my 10 year old to become vegetarian about a year ago, it is a pain but i don't suffer from fatigue like you so I totally understand your reservations.

Essentially I tend to make a veggie version of whatever I'm cooking with either a meat replacement or mushrooms or pulses. If I'm doing a roast dinner I just stick a couple of veggie sausages in for her or a quorn lattice. Chilli con carne = 5 bean chilli. She can cook her own fried eggs.

It's possible to make it fairly low effort but is still some effort obviously, which may not work for you.

Some vegetarian meals I can tolerate include Halloumi bake, omelette/frittata/quiche, mushroom risotto or mushroom stir fry.

I became a vegetarian age 6, back before veggie products were cheap and easily available. I pretty much had beans and scrambled eggs on toast for tea every night, I could make it myself by about age 8. The odd weekend I stayed with my grandparents and my grandad who was a butcher and was convinced I was about to die of malnutrition would try and force me to eat meat. It completely ruined our relationship.

Over two decades later I'm still veggie and one of my sons has decided to be too. My best advice is to drop your standards. Beans on toast is fine. If he wants to be veggie he'll have less variety, that's just how it is. Quorn products tend to upset my stomach but Linda McCartney sausages and mozzarella burgers are lovely and cause me no problems. I really wouldn't try and force him to eat meat, a lot of vegetarians I know who were forced as children found the idea they were eating a corpse very traumatic and it's affected their relationships long term.

Good luck with everything.

You said you eat veggie several days a week anyway. So cool up double batches for home when you do!

I assumed you couldn't eat tofu, but if you can, I highly recommend giving it one last try this way:
Cauldron brand (works with others but this is my favourite)
Press it for a couple of hours (tea towel folded over it, between two chopping boards, tins on top)
Chop into 1.5-2cm cubes
Fry or bake until golden on the outside

Can then be used as you would cooked chicken in a stir fry, with a sauce etc. (Tofu Stroganoff is a favourite here, we also use it in fried rice and noodle dishes)

The texture is completely different from other preparations, and this is pretty much the only way I like tofu.

@EndlessWaffle

You said you eat veggie several days a week anyway. So cool up double batches for home when you do!

Never said that in the slightest

@Trut
Unfortunately what you can and can’t eat with IBD is very unique to the person, which is why gastroenterologists don’t tend to give much dietary advice beyond avoiding high fibre foods. The majority of people I know with IBD avoid most fruit and veg and stay high fat (so as not to lose vast amounts of weight) and low fibre. I have been specifically told to eat red meat because I become anaemic very quickly due to abnormally heavy periods (I can’t wait for menopause!) and, as is the case with most IBD patients, I can’t tolerate oral iron supplements. If I don’t eat red meat I have to go in every two months to have iron infusions via IV. As I already have 6 weekly medication via IV, this isn’t really something I want to do when I can get what I need from my diet.
I can’t tolerate squashes or pumpkin very well unless it is cooked to oblivion and then blended, due to its fibre content. It’s very frustrating because I love vegetables. Strangely, I can eat most salad veggies, even though most IBD sufferers can’t.