To not invite my DDs friends.

[Julz1622]

I have booked a socially distanced visit from Santa and Anna and Elsa on Christmas Eve for my daughter (8) and the baby (10 months) I live in a block of flats, and I was telling one of the mum's of one of daughter's friends about it. She said oh let me know what time they are coming and I'll send 'name' across. She has also told a few of the other mums on the block. Now I know some people will think I am being selfish, but I've paid £50 for them to come visit my daughter, I don't want all the kids congregating and ruining it for my daughters.

I think that is why this treat is having to happen in the downstairs bit of the flat, I really doubt other children will even know it's happening and posters are forgetting in flats people tend to keep to themselves.

Glummy: So you've never done Santa, tooth fairy, told a white lie to get them to eat their food, etc?
...
Mine always enjoyed food and needed no encouragement to eat.

Tooth fairy, yes, but we all knew there wasn't really a tooth fairy, it was just a bit of fun.

Friends of mine didn't tell their children there was a 'Santa' but they said it was fun to pretend and he dressed up in a Father Christmas outfit to dispense gifts. They had lots of fun and were happy, we were the same without presenting imaginary friends as facts.

I used to read a lot as a child and really thought myself into stories, imagining many scenarios and drew pictures of the same. I also made up stories. However I did know they were fantasy. There's nothing wrong with fantasy, I'm a great believer in escapism but that is what it is. Real life can be pretty good too and will be even more so when lockdown is over.

That said we hired a fairy for dds 6 th party I think. It was a hell of a lot more than £50 😁. Worth every penny. She was great. Friend said recently her rather literal dd had absolutely believed she was real for years. When explained that fairies aren’t real she said “they are there was one at little TSwifts party” 😁

@jessstan1 so you "lied" about the tooth fairy? Dear oh dear.

I'm pretty sure an 8yo will know the real Anna and Elsa aren't visiting them, it doesn't make it less exciting. I imagine the feeling of knowing they're as loved as they are will be the highlight of the visit.

I suspect they will think I am taking the piss if they expect to see 2 kids and turn up to loads.

That is a very legitimate concern, OP. You don't want to be landed with an extra bill.

Do you know if the organisers know about the setting details? They're not expecting to do it outside the block altogether?

[quote GlummyMcGlummerson]@jessstan1 so you "lied" about the tooth fairy? Dear oh dear.

I'm pretty sure an 8yo will know the real Anna and Elsa aren't visiting them, it doesn't make it less exciting. I imagine the feeling of knowing they're as loved as they are will be the highlight of the visit.[/quote]
No I didn't lie! I said we put money under the pillow in return for a tooth but that there is a traditional story about a fairy doing it which is how it all started. I presume that is how it all started, I didn't check and don't think I've ever read the story. Do kids believe in the 'tooth fairy'? I never did and didn't know any others who did, we all knew it was a story and that mum or dad put the coin there. It was fun anyway.

Your last sentence, second para, resonates with me. I am sure you are right about and that is what is important.

@jessstan1 I feel really sorry for your family, all the magic, mystery and fun they have missed out on! Children don't always need the truth. In fact I think believing in these things is good for them. Children grow up too fast as it is these days, why not encourage some fun?

Gordon Bennett. By the time this event happens, every kid will have seen 50 santas of one sort or another in various locations, collecting for charity or whatever else. They're not going to suddenly think that the one who turns up at OP's door with a couple of women dressed as Elsa and Anna is the REAL ONE. Consequently, they're not going to be devastated.

Seriously, there are some grips that need to be got by some posters.

Who says we didn't have fun? We had plenty and we played 'pretend' at times. Do not please feel 'really sorry' for a situation about which you know nothing!

@jessstan1 - and yet you keep lamenting how awful this will be for OP's daughter, about whom you know absolutely nothing. Each to their own.

I just cannot imagine such a scenario, Ohtherewearethen, I have never known anyone who would do something like it but as you say, each to their own. I hope the child enjoys it. Pay no attention to me.

Times have changed too, I realise that. Santa Claus/Father Christmas is no longer just a charming, mythical person who delivers presents when everyone is asleep.

[quote inappropriateraspberry]@jessstan1 I feel really sorry for your family, all the magic, mystery and fun they have missed out on! Children don't always need the truth. In fact I think believing in these things is good for them. Children grow up too fast as it is these days, why not encourage some fun?[/quote]
I don't agree with anything @jessstan1 has posted today but that's a bit strong .

saraclara
Those Santas don't count though. Santas don't count anywhere other than the OP's flat. Character visits also don't count unless it's at the OP's flat.

I heard she was a mean spirited, Christmas hating Scrooge

It really doesn't matter, Wheresmykimchi, none of us really know each other and we're bound to have different opinions. Life goes on regardless.

@jessstan1

It really doesn't matter, Wheresmykimchi, none of us really know each other and we're bound to have different opinions. Life goes on regardless.

I just think saying they feel sorry for your family is a bit much

[quote inappropriateraspberry]@jessstan1 of course they believe in it - because they want to believe! My daughter would be amazed to see Santa, Elsa and Anna turn up at her door! [/quote]
I think there is definitely a certain amount of wanting to believe, like Fox Mulder, children seem to have greater capacity to ignore things that don't quite gel with their belief - they are much better at ignoring the zipper up the back, so to speak. Maybe their ability to assess what is genuine and what is faked is not as sharp as it will be in time, maybe they want to overlook something they know will lessen their enjoyment; either way they are happy to accept something less than perfect and just enjoy the moment.

I had a certain amount of mirth from this years ago when DH was a member of Round Table. They used to go out with a Santa and sleigh (a trailer with a wooden cut out of reindeer and sleigh with room for Collector Elves on board) playing Christmas songs through a PA system, we collected donations for a local charity. The members had to take a turn at being Santa and of course the role came around to DH. I, as a collector elf with a bucket, was secretly delighted to see him being utterly mobbed by a huge number of children - about 20-25, like a classful - and the look on his face as he was surrounded by all these children screaming "Santa!" was priceless, like Father Ted in Ireland's largest lingerie department. I'll never forget it He's more used to small children now, boringly...

Maybe the people who demand everything has to be shared and equal do not realise they are actually stopping their children from developing in full functioning adults.
Children can not be protected from reality.
So a Santa arrives at the flats, you tell your children that they must be visiting someone , not encourage them to go intrude.
People like OP are allowed to enjoy a private event, and yes they can do it where it is safe in the hall, there is no health and safety issue for a one off max 20 min event.
If I was passing by on my way upstairs , even if I had children I would not try to be included, I would be telling my children quick upstairs, You can see Santa tonight when he comes to our house, if you manage to wake up in time.

Exactly, @mummmy2017. You normally find that the ones who claim that everybody should share everything are usually the ones whose children snatch toys from other children and then tell the other child off for not 'sharing'. My child is too young to get the idea of Santa yet but I can think of many things I would say to her in an event like this. It is up to the other parents to manage this, not the OP.
Interestingly, the most vocal of the posters on here has repeatedly failed to answer if she's happy to drive a car in front of neighbours who don't have one, or if she'd happily allow a neighbour to declare that their child would be sharing her child's driving lesson that she was paying for. But no, the OP is the tightest of the tight for thinking the neighbour was a cheeky example for saying she'd send her child round to 'share' this experience that she'd bought for her children. I really don't understand how the children would even see it, I pay no attention whatsoever to my windows. I would have no idea if my neighbours had a visit from the police let alone Santa. If the parents point it out to their children because they know it's happening, it's purely because they want to muscle in on it. They and they alone are solely responsible for any disappointment their children may feel from not being allowed to gatecrash this event.

@LolaSmiles

saraclara Those Santas don't count though. Santas don't count anywhere other than the OP's flat. Character visits also don't count unless it's at the OP's flat.

I heard she was a mean spirited, Christmas hating Scrooge

Yes if it was any other location in the entire world it would be fine - but not the OP's flat

I am with you op, they are rude and grabby, if they want this then they need to pay for it. If you were visiting Santa at a shopping centre they wouldn't be able to push in front and go in with you and this is what they are doing.

I just think saying they feel sorry for your family is a bit much flowers

Thanks, Wheresmykimchi, but I didn't think much about that and if I remember correctly, I did respond. People say things off the top of their heads sometimes, I daresay I do it too :-). It's not worth worrying about.

I stand by what I said. I do feel sorry for your children, why begrudge them a few years of fun? Life is crappy enough, what's wrong with encouraging belief in Father Christmas? I understand you do other nice things with your children, but it's so matter of fact, and I hope your children don't ruin it for others.

@inappropriateraspberry

I stand by what I said. I do feel sorry for your children, why begrudge them a few years of fun? Life is crappy enough, what's wrong with encouraging belief in Father Christmas? I understand you do other nice things with your children, but it's so matter of fact, and I hope your children don't ruin it for others.

I've mostly disagreed with @jessstan1 but this is really uncalled for - I'm sure her children are perfectly happy!

I'm. It saying they aren't happy otherwise, just seems mean to 'explain' Father Christmas, tooth fairy etc to them.

*I'm not saying