To not invite my DDs friends.

[Julz1622]

I have booked a socially distanced visit from Santa and Anna and Elsa on Christmas Eve for my daughter (8) and the baby (10 months) I live in a block of flats, and I was telling one of the mum's of one of daughter's friends about it. She said oh let me know what time they are coming and I'll send 'name' across. She has also told a few of the other mums on the block. Now I know some people will think I am being selfish, but I've paid £50 for them to come visit my daughter, I don't want all the kids congregating and ruining it for my daughters.

It's really, really, really not unkind to not share stuff you've paid for for your family, with others

You’re just not listening, are you?

flaviaritt
People are listening.
Just because they think your position is silly doesn't mean they aren't listening.

Do you think that the parent's brother should be ensuring his nieces and nephews all attend the spiderman visit? Or do you think he should cancel it because it isn't fair for some children to have a visit and not others?

Flaviaritt

I like you.

These people have no care for others and they don’t want to. You can’t explain to them that it’s nice to be kind and generous because they don’t value that. They think I’m drunk because I suggested that, which shows their moral basis.

They probably think the earth is flat too.

I honestly would've just replied "that's lovely, here's the contact details, it's £50 and you need to book it through them"

I feel terrible for the kids, though, but her mom is a true CF

Incrediblytired

I like you too!

LolaSmiles

No, that poster isn’t listening. Neither are you. I have been very clear that I don’t regard it as a moral obligation to share everything. I believe this is a special case because of the circumstances. But you are ignoring that, because doing so helps shore up an otherwise weak argument.

@LolaSmiles that's a really good point. Women and poor people - the most hated combo in the U.K. as seen by the "nice" people on this thread.

I'm not sure why no one is addressing that the neighbours could pay for an experience.

You’re just not listening, are you?

I am, and I don't agree with you, your stance of "everyone should be kind and giving to their neighbours...except for me" is very odd.

These people have no care for others and they don’t want to. You can’t explain to them that it’s nice to be kind and generous because they don’t value that. They think I’m drunk because I suggested that, which shows their moral basis

I asked if you were driving k because you were waffling on about PHDs not because of your views.

They probably think the earth is flat too.

What a weird stretch yea thinking "I don't want to share my paid for family experience with people who could simply book it themselves" = a conspiracy theory nut.

No, that poster isn’t listening. Neither are you. I have been very clear that I don’t regard it as a moral obligation to share everything. I believe this is a special case because of the circumstances. But you are ignoring that, because doing so helps shore up an otherwise weak argument
Yawn.

So I'll ask again, the parent's brother is doing a character visit for his children for christmas. Does he have a moral obligation to invite his nieces and nephews because it's the morally correct thing to do, and they are family after all? Does this person's brother have a moral obligation to cancel a Christmas character visit if he isn't willing to open it to every child on his street?

Or are you going to argue that his character visit for his children doesn't count, whilst the OP's character visit should be open to all?

@flaviaritt

LolaSmiles

No, that poster isn’t listening. Neither are you. I have been very clear that I don’t regard it as a moral obligation to share everything. I believe this is a special case because of the circumstances. But you are ignoring that, because doing so helps shore up an otherwise weak argument.

What rubbish, you've consistently posted "what a grinch" and "how unkind" when people have simply said "I wouldn't share a paid for experience with anyone else". Come on then Miss Humble what do you do for your neighbour's at Christmas?

And you're still not addressing the fact that
A. Weed smoking neighbour could lay off the weed for a bit and get an experience herself, and
B. She could go to her brothers for the Spiderman thing

So I'll ask again, the parent's brother is doing a character visit for his children for christmas. Does he have a moral obligation to invite his nieces and nephews because it's the morally correct thing to do, and they are family after all? Does this person's brother have a moral obligation to cancel a Christmas character visit if he isn't willing to open it to every child on his street?

You’re cloth-eared, Lola. It isn’t complicated. It’s Christmas Eve and Father Christmas is magic. This isn’t the same thing as a character visit. So you can keep pushing on with this poor line of argument, or you can actually think about how these kids are going to feel when Father Christmas walks past their flat and doesn’t come to them.

@LolaSmiles

No, that poster isn’t listening. Neither are you. I have been very clear that I don’t regard it as a moral obligation to share everything. I believe this is a special case because of the circumstances. But you are ignoring that, because doing so helps shore up an otherwise weak argument Yawn.

So I'll ask again, the parent's brother is doing a character visit for his children for christmas. Does he have a moral obligation to invite his nieces and nephews because it's the morally correct thing to do, and they are family after all? Does this person's brother have a moral obligation to cancel a Christmas character visit if he isn't willing to open it to every child on his street?

Or are you going to argue that his character visit for his children doesn't count, whilst the OP's character visit should be open to all?

Of course she's not, because the brother isn't on this thread to bash so she can feel better about herself.

Glummy.

You called me dim and I pointed out I had a phd. The causal nexus evidences that you cannot be correct. Alcohol doesn’t come into it. Keep up love.

@Incrediblytired I have no idea what you're going on about.

I didn't call you a dim I said that a PP wasn't implying you're a cunt like you claimed, they were implying you're being dim. There's a difference.

Why are people still engaging with flaviaritt? She clearly thinks she's right and will reply to Every. Single. Person. twisting herself up in knots to do so.

Disengage.

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch
You really are a heel,
You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch,
You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel.
You're a monster, Mr. Grinch,
Your heart's an empty hole,
Your brain is full of spiders, you have garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch,

@flaviaritt

So I'll ask again, the parent's brother is doing a character visit for his children for christmas. Does he have a moral obligation to invite his nieces and nephews because it's the morally correct thing to do, and they are family after all? Does this person's brother have a moral obligation to cancel a Christmas character visit if he isn't willing to open it to every child on his street?

You’re cloth-eared, Lola. It isn’t complicated. It’s Christmas Eve and Father Christmas is magic. This isn’t the same thing as a character visit. So you can keep pushing on with this poor line of argument, or you can actually think about how these kids are going to feel when Father Christmas walks past their flat and doesn’t come to them.

Is that a yes or a no to the brother inviting weed smoking neighbour around? Why is HE not being ungenerous with his Santa visit - you know, an actual family member - but OP is?

She clearly thinks she's right

Oh my.

@flaviaritt no opinion on the open Santa in a shopping mall? I need to know if I have to pay for other people's kids who can't otherwise have the same as mine?

that a yes or a no to the brother inviting weed smoking neighbour around? Why is HE not being ungenerous with his Santa visit - you know, an actual family member - but OP is?

Where did I say he wasn’t being ungenerous? What does this have to do with whether the OP is or is not being unreasonable?

GlummyMcGlummerson

What exactly are you asking about grottos? Be clearer.

@flaviaritt

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch You really are a heel, You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch, You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel. You're a monster, Mr. Grinch, Your heart's an empty hole, Your brain is full of spiders, you have garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch,

Well done on your copy and paste.

Here's mine, to you:

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself

GlummyMcGlummerson

Larkin is also a grinch, IMO.

@flaviaritt

GlummyMcGlummerson

What exactly are you asking about grottos? Be clearer.

I've been very clear already but if you need it slowly explaining:

I take my children every (non covid) year to a Santa in the local mall. It's a charity Santa, he's a volunteer and the money goes to the local children's charity (including towards getting local impoverished children Xmas presents). This is the primary reason I pick this Santa and not the local garden centre magical ride for £25 (though I can afford the latter, and I put in £25 usually for this charity Santa, donations are at the giver's discretion) is because I want my children to have that charity experience and understand how fortunate they are and why it's important to be charitable.

Anyhoo, the charity isn't a loaded garden centre that is able to do fancy sleigh rides and Lego sets as gifts - it's a gated area with some decorated trees, large elf figures, decorations and an uncovered sleigh that Santa sit on. No cover, marquee, nothing - everyone can see and hear kids talking to Santa and they can see him hand them presents.

My question is - am I and others "unkind" for "flaunting" the fact that we are visiting Santa? Some people really couldn't afford £1 to do this, some people simply haven't the time. By your standards, I am unkind, because if everyone person passing can't be included then no one should have it at all. So interested in your stance on that one.

@flaviaritt

GlummyMcGlummerson

Larkin is also a grinch, IMO.

Larkin speaks the stark truth.

@flaviaritt

Can people not just tell their kids it's not the real Santa?

No, they can’t. It ruins the magic.

We've always told our children that the Santa's they see at shopping centres etc are 'Helper Santa's' friends of Santa that help him out in December. But the real Santa does some of it. So you never know which one you will get! Made it more credible when they passed three different Santa's in town in an hour!