Panicking about fitting in Xmas activities with DC before they grow up.

[Viv0321]

I am Panicking about fitting in Xmas activities with DC before they grow up. Time is flying by and they are 7 years old.

I feel there is only a short amount of time to fit in things with DC before they grow up and feel that everything is ‘rushed’ to fit things in.

Things like:- Christmassy uk holidays where you stay in a lodge and there’s lots of Xmas activities for the DC. Lapland. Theme parks. Light trails. Different Santa experiences. Garden centres. Etc.

AIBU?

Anyone?

Yabu. None of that is necessary. Teach your children that Christmas is about the people you are with, not what you have and do.

I did most of those things as a child but those aren't the Christmas memories I cherish.

I loved helping to bake, being lifted to put the star on the top of the tree, making "fancy" hot chocolate (with squirty cream, marshmallows and a candy cane!), watching a Christmas movie in the livingroom with blankets and only the tree lights on, being allowed to choose a gift from under the tree to open after our bath in new pjs on Christmas eve etc and dancing around the house to Christmas songs - these are all the things I've focused on with mine.

Christmas is about fun not worry!

I'm sorry but you're being a bit ridiculous. There are many generations here and in life in general who managed to grow up just fine without any of that stuff. There are many things that children NEED in life, this marketing part-you-from-your-money stuff isn't one of them.

Oh God OP...do you go on Instagram a lot? I ask because all of those "activities" are just money grabbing crap in the main. The real experiences and memories are made by YOU at home and in your community.

My children remember their visits to village fetes, going out for hot chocolate and cakes at the cafe before posting the Christmas cards...making decorations at home...

We never once stayed in a lodge or had a "Santa experience"

This sounds like misplaced anxiety transferred from something else.

I'll happily admit that I'm sad that we wont have a Father Christmas trip this year. DTs are on the absolute cusp of 'believing'. They definitely won't next year.

Lapland / Theme parks / garden centres? Not so necessary for Christmas.

light trails and garden centres are fun for adults too so you have a while..
I never had a Xmas holiday away or lapland and can't say I feel bothered about it! Xmas was fab for all the simple things Penguinerector states.

But these things are really tacky OP. You've just been advertised at.

Not done any of that with mine. We like decorating the tree, baking and crafting but it’s all as hoc and done at home. Ice skating has been a fun activity in the last couple of years but that was organised by DD friends on inset day. They’ve only seen Santa a couple of times and they were very small at that point. Too much of the other stuff and constant activity gets in the way of magic!

I mean, they're still going to have happy memories of Christmas as long as you bought them some presents, played some games with them and sat through a film that they wanted to watch.

It's very dull when people go on about not having had these things in their childhoods, but let's face it, those of us born before 2000 never had any of that stuff, and Christmas was still absolute magic.

The obsession with 'making memories' is basically a way to make you feel bad if you don't spend loads of money on 'days out'. You can't control what your children remember from their childhood. It's as likely to be the day that you went for a bike ride and saw people having a fight in the park, as it is to be 'meeting Santa'.

It's lovely that you want your children to have a happy memory of Christmas, but I think you've been sucked in by the idea that expensive pre packaged joy is the best / only way to do that, when that's really not true.

@helloxhristmas if you search live video Santa on fb you can have a zoom call with Santa . My kids are excited they think Santa can’t visit due to quarantine restrictions that will only be lifted in Xmas Eve.

The vast majority of children won't have all of those. Some won't have any. They will mostly still have fond memories.

We don't have to do everything. We have to care for our children. Show them they are loved and valued. Not spend lots of money on stuff they will barely remember.

Yeah cos parenting is a tick box exercise

All of those things are enjoyed up to Adulthood. So try not to stress, or it'll come across as a tick box exercise. As older teens my DD's loved theatre trips and Christmas trips to places like London, Stratford-upon-Avon and Edinburgh. Now as all Adults we try to do at least one Christmas Market a year together. I usually manage two with my youngest. It's things like seasonally themed soft play parties that they grow out of. But I agree that activities don't always equate to the best memories.

Panicking?Really?FFS.YABU

I didn't do any of that and my children haven't either but we have great Christmases so you are definitely very unreasonable

Garden centres?
I'm stumped!

Some absolute wankers sometimes on Mumsnet.... OP YANBU. I feel the same. I want to do the best for my little boy (same age) and feel like the last 7 years has flown! I think it feels like you only have the santa years while they believe to make things count but you sound like a great Mum, and that you want things to be great for them. As well as the big things it really is the small things too xx

They are nice activities, but they never work out the way you think they will. Last time I spent a load on one of those garden centre santa experiences, my DS whizzed round the whole thing and ignored the activities and the youngest just grizzled then fell asleep in the pushchair! I have much happier memories of things like going on frosty winter walks and snuggling up watching xmas films with them.

And yeah, get off Instagram if you are on it. It's exhausting. My cousin does an entire 24-day Christmas countdown with the kids including elaborate elf on the shelf shit and about 5 visits to santa including those expensive vintage train journeys and Lapland UK. I feel tired just looking at her feed.

Are you really panicking about that?

Things like:- Christmassy uk holidays where you stay in a lodge and there’s lots of Xmas activities for the DC. Lapland. Theme parks. Light trails. Different Santa experiences. Garden centres. Etc.

Crikey, someone’s fallen for the advertising!

What would you enjoy most? Christmas with a relaxed mother, pottering about the house, watching films, decorating the tree and being together, or Christmas with a stressed out mother who was trying to tick off various Insta-worthy experiences and was too busy #makingmemories to actually be present emotionally?

AIBU?

So much.

@nemeton

Garden centres? I'm stumped!

Apparently garden centres don't just sell plants and compost these days.

I learned on here that the long established garden centre a few miles from where I live also has a Santa's Grotto, decorations market, indoor soft play, outdoor jungle gym, food hall, butchers, garden furniture and BBQ showroom, ice cream and street food vans.

It's a major destination for families at the weekend apparently. I had no idea, but kept seeing it mentioned on 'things to do in my city' type threads.

no absolutely not. you are a marketing teams dream so easy to convince

I'm 32 and still bloody love Christmas at home with my parents. we never did anything but stay home, santa presents, leaving stuff out for the reindeer, watching Christmas films! going to visit my nana Christmas morning etc

Never felt I missed out on anything - and now i plan on doing the very same with my baby !

Generations of children grew up without most of those and still somehow managed to have happy memories of Christmas. God only know how, poor deprived little souls!

Most of the activities can be enjoyed into adulthood - a long way into adulthood, to be honest. We're both retired and looking forward to our trip on the Polar Express run by a local steam railway.

I really think your post is more to do with what you want to do than providing your children with memories.