To be sick of hearing....

[Wibblywobbly40]

Before anyone jumps on me this not aimed at everyone but a select few

AIBU to be sick of hearing i need a break or you are lucky from single parent friends (who's children's fathers are involved).

I understand everyone needs a break from their parenting life but I find my single parent friends seem to crave that break alot even though all of my single parent friends only have their kids some 50/50 and a couple 5 days a week. They also like to tell me and a couple of other friends we are lucky to have partners to split the load.

In reality or at least my reality I have my DC's 24/7 regardless whether their dad is home or not the majority of us family households don't get 2-3 night breaks each week, my DH works full time sometimes 13 hour days which is bringing him in late so most of the time DC's are in bed but when he is off and we are splitting the load neither of us get a break regardless until they go to bed.

I think we are very lucky and blessed to be able to enjoy the kids together, but him walking through the door doesn't automatically mean I get a break it's means then there are 2 of us making the load lighter.

Is it only me that thinks that way that in reality single parents get more of a break than parents together get?? And single parents shouldn't automatically assume that's its easier because there is 2 of us??

I'm in the fortunate position of amicably co parenting with my xh, 50/50. I do get a good break, I di enjoy it, and because neither of has a new partner we still holiday together, spend Christmas and birthdays together, and help each other out as and when. When we together he did nothing in terms of the kids or house, it's much better now!

However, I am very much in the minority, my dsis has it much harder as a single parent, in fact she comes on our holidays too so we can all help each other!

I think it depends on your partner. I know a (very) small number of people who would find life much easier and get much more of a break without their worse-than-useless husbands!

But if you have anything like a functional relationship, then you are being very unreasonable.

@giningit i think the OP has stood her ground pretty much all the way through this thread and has resolved it with her friend which the OP was about.
Do you want her stay around to argue with you because you are now ready for the fight that they have had with so many other people do you think you are the one to change her view on this which she has not changed throughout this thread??
I was a single parent with a dad who done nothing for my DD my parents had her once a month for me but on that day once a month I seen it as having time off from my child because instead of doing all the chores I made time for myself because that was the point me having time away from the kids to do whatever I pleased and letting my chores and mental overload return on the days I needed to address them.
I also think now I am in a relationship its alot harder to get that me time because my DP work hours that clash and we can't always work around to me getting any free time.
So I agree with OP people who are split with their child's other parent and the other parent takes the children they do get time off, it's not op's fault that they choose to not take the time off mentally and live a little

I'm a single parent to 3 children. My two eldest their dad passed away last year and my youngest child's father has had no involvement since I found out I was having her. I'm a properly single on my own parent. And quite frankly it's hard really hard and before my ex died it was still unbelievably hard.

I feel like with a partner at least there is someone there if u feel like u can't tell them off again or help with housework or just being in the house is a big deal. Cause when my kids are in bed at night it's just me alone with my thoughts and the house to clean

Your post is quite frankly u being a smug arsehole

Despite ops supposed apologies and backtracking I'm not convinced.

She was stressed about other things which are actually nothing to do with and not caused by single parents yet that's who she lashed out at! Both here and in real life apparently (if that's even true I have my doubts and I certainly don't think she'll have been as honest with them as she was here in her opinions!)

I feel sorry for her single parent friends and indeed if she has said to them even a toned down version of what she thinks that is YET AGAIN single parents being made to feel shit just for BEING single parents which is a nasty and unnecessary thing to do.

We get it ALL the time from every bloody angle!

Friends and family, msm, sm, govt... bloody everywhere!

I sincerely hope you never are a single parent op as I think you would find it incredibly difficult not least because of your clear low opinion of them which you would then need to not only apply to yourself but would be hearing from all the places we currently do.

This was a nasty prejudicial thread and op has not properly apologised or acknowledged the offence and hurt she has caused and has now in effect run away - disgusting!

Nice bit of backtracking op. Loving the whatabouttery too, from op and some pps.

One of my dc has a physical disability, and for various reasons her life, and our experience as parents is a lot easier than it is for many able bodied people & parents of able bodied dc. And that position isn't completely unique to us. But nobody with any common sense or decency would think it reasonable to bleat on about how life is often easier for the disabled because blah blah blah, it's so hard being able bodied, it's harder parenting my able bodied dc. Although I have no doubt some pps would give it a good effort.

It's all just bullshit really. Some people need a diversion from their own inadequacies, and for a small minority of women in relationships looking down on single parents fills that gap. And they really resent it when any single parent might have an imagined advantage. Let alone when someone they view as beneath them has a real advantage.

When I was a lone parent I was fortunate from a financial pov, now as a couple we're even more secure. Yet it was only as a lone parent I ever really encountered resentment, because of course I had no right to be a young lone parent with more security than a couple. Silly me though, I should have started a goady thread stereotyping all married sahm's.