To be sick of miserable people shouting at (my) children?

[Yellowballoon77]

I am a SAHM so I see this a lot more than DH does. Especially since - in order to keep sane - we’re generally out and about every chance we get.

I think this is a lockdown / Covid thing, but I am SICK of people mindlessly telling off my kids for pretty much no reason. I’m all for “the village” mentality, but the “village” feeling quite mean-spirited and I've had enough.

Things that happened this last few weeks:
3-year-old ran from one bit of the paved park to another, across the path of an older couple walking. 3-yr-old didn’t bump into anyone, didn’t make anyone have to swerve or even slow down really, and was probably still about 2m away from them, but the lady (maybe in her 70s) shouted “get your child away from me!” And then, when I responded with a gaping mouth, she said, “Put your child in school! They shouldn’t be out like this!”

Another instance:
Park today, preschooler and school-aged child doing cartwheels on the grass. A dog wanders over, so school-aged child (who absolutely loves dogs) asks the owner if he can stroke the dog. Owner says “No, don’t touch other people’s pets!” (A Covid fear, I know, but the kid asked!) and then dragged his dog away by the collar and muttered “fucking kids” under his breath. I mean... whaaaat?! The dog wasn’t touched! I was . Man wouldn’t look at me at all, I told him to stop being so rude to kids. He heard me, but didn’t look me in the face.

Another example: kids playing loudly (how dare they?!) in our big shared garden. Woman who I don’t know sticks her head out the window and shouts “shut up! Shut up!” And then slams the window. It was about 1pm.

I have about three other examples of the same kind of thing.

And pretty much NONE from about a year ago and beyond so sure it’s a Covid fear and kids are easy targets to yell at.

I’m sick of it. It’s really starting to bother me and make me wonder if it’s like this everywhere now, or just where I live.

Am I alone in noticing it?!

Children are not exempt from social distancing so you shouldn’t be letting them go near others.

Noise in the garden depends on levels, I’d imagine it was pretty loud if neighbours were complaining.

I get that, but I am pretty sure they were AT LEAST 2m away from others when all these things happened.

I should have added that the person who shouted out the window doesn’t own part of the shared garden. And the noise was general kid noise. Playing and laughing and such.

You just sound unluckiest that you've crossed people at the end of their thether. People definitely have less patience as a result of this year and that's all it is. There are probably good reasons for their reactions... Watch any sit com series and the main character always has an episode where they've done nothing wrong but just as pure coincidence it's pushed everyone else over the edge. Tomorrow is a new day.

Tbf I have a 16 month old and don't want other kids running near him when they don't need to. Depends on the noise levels. I get kids playing in gardens but if they're continually screaming etc I'd feel the same.
I know children should be able to run free but I think you need to make your kids aware of personal space.

@IceCreamAndCandyfloss

Children are not exempt from social distancing so you shouldn’t be letting them go near others.

Noise in the garden depends on levels, I’d imagine it was pretty loud if neighbours were complaining.

This. Were the kids screaming in the garden? That sound can be like fingernails down a blackboard. Maybe you have neighbours WFH?

The dog walker was an arse. If you don't want your dog touched, don't allow it to approach other people (keep it on a lead or call it away) so I'm with you on that one.

They all sound unnecessarily rude and grumpy. I don't think telling them not to touch other people's pets is a fear of covid though, it's sensible advice as you don't know how the dog will react to a strange child touching it.

Your kids sound pretty irritating. Maybe you should focus more on that rather than assuming everyone else is wrong!

Most people are on edge at the moment. Look at what we’re living through, it’s understandable. And most people find “general kid noise” to be fucking annoying even if they’re too polite to say so.

What a load of miserable bastards. I’d move.

There are miserable buggers everywhere unfortunately, and Covid just gives them an excuse to be more shouty.
In future a firm “please calm yourself down and don’t be so ridiculous” should shut them up.

And the noise was general kid noise. Playing and laughing and such.

I suspect it was probably louder than you think to cause the reaction from the neighbour.

With second lockdown beginning, and it being 1pm, is it possible that the neighbour was working from home in the middle of the day, and the children’s noise was too loud, and interrupting their work?

Unfortunately, with second lockdown “playing loudly” (does this mean screaming?) in a shared garden space might not be the best idea for the next few weeks.

I agree - I think I have been unlucky getting people at the end of their tether. I live in London so the chances of finding people who are scared and have had enough are greater (as there are so many people here). But I can’t think of a single instance where a random person was rude to my kids pre-Covid. Times are hard for everyone (believe me I know that!), but the miserly attitudes are bringing us all down even further.

And why is it ok to shout at kids for being KIDS?

By the way, if anyone knows how to teach a 3-year-old to stay away from others and keep their distance please tell me!

Sometimes it’s them but sometimes it’s definitely your kids!

I haven't experienced most of this but I was shopping with DD (then 2.5) and an elderly lady tutted at me and made a remark that she should be at school. My DD is very petite and there no way she could pass for school age

haven't experienced this myself, with my DC. So I'm not sure. Could you try and be more socially conscious at the moment while people are more on edge

I have been a parent for nearly 2 decades and haven't had that many random people getting angry at my kids in all that time.

Either you are really unlucky, or your kids are more annoying than you have admitted here

Children are exempt from social distancing in Wales

Op my dc are 16 & 18 now, but I remember them being small and how thoroughly shitty & intolerant some people could be for little or no reason. I don't think it's lockdown I just thing how things are 🤷‍♀️

I’ve only had it once where Someone shouted at my kid for going close to them In a playground!!!

My son asks to stroke about 10 dogs a day and yet to meet someone who said no, most put them on a lead and let him or even let him throw the dogs ball.

Today my son fell off his bike and a man helped him back up, and then apologised for touching him saying sorry he couldn’t just leave him there

Believe me, I find kid-screaming fingers-on-the-blackboard too. I’d be the first to tell them to stop if it were that. They were playing a normal game and making normal (loud, I’ll give you - because kids are loud when they play) noises (mostly laughing) and it wasn’t on a weekday.

People are bound to find my kids - like all kids - annoying. But why is it ok to tell people off randomly like that? Kids or not?! If someone annoys me I don’t shout at them. I didn’t should at the woman who told me to put my 3-year-old in school even though she annoyed me so much I had to rant about it on here

I think the UK is pretty unfriendly towards kids in general, but yeah I think those people you have encountered sound particularly cantankerous

@Grenlei I'm not sure how you can conclude that from the OPs post, are trying to make her feel bad?

Cross posted, you live in London

Sounds like you’ve been unlucky, most people here are as chatty and friendly as ever.
The dog thing isn’t a covid fear, just sensible

You've come to the wrong place. A large enough proportion of MN hates kids. 🤣 Not only that, you'll probably be told your version of events is false.