so we are now arresting people NOW Shocking

[Meadow1203]

I thought this was wind up but sadly it is true. A 73 year old retired nurse has been arrested and put in handcuffs because she took her own mother out of a care home. She has not had proper contact for 9 months and her poor 97 year old mum was ailing, she wanted to bring her home to care for her. Wow just wow how have we come to this.

@Meadow1203

The video is appalling, what is wrong with people these days. Have you experience of dealing with an relative with Dementia and carehomes? I do in heaps

Yea actually

If the woman was able to take care of her mother then why was she in the home in the first place

What's appalling is people who blindly refuse to accept facts and insist stuff is discusting and shocking when it's not

@vodkaredbullgirl

Sorry to say this but its not the homes fault, it's government fault and this dam deadly virus.

They have had months to sort something out for care homes. It has been obvious from the start that this pandemic was going to get worse in the winter months.

We as carers hate to see our residents go downhill, not been able to see family.

What would they sort out?

Either they let visitors in and residents who are able out, and they will almost certainly have covid in the home, or they don't, which is arguably a pretty significant human rights violation, not to mention cruel.

Frankly they should be glad if families who are able come to get their loved ones. They are screwed if they have to stay, every day they are in there there is a real chance they will die of something else having been kept apart for months on end.

Yes I work in dementia unit.

We don't much about it do we. I made a safeguarding alert to social services re an elderly relative with dementia and cancer whose wife wouldn't let him go into a home. She also had dementia and her behaviour was inappropriate to say the least. They eventually moved him for respite care and he never went back home and quite frankly that was the right decision but I'm sure when she told people that he had been forcibly removed from her it seemed unreasonable.

I know nothing about the people in the story but who knows what is going on behind the scenes.

@Meadow1203

If a care worker tried to stop me taking mu dad out of his home if I wanted to take him I would have shoved her too. The woman is retired nurse and can take care of her needs. Really please don not try and justify this

You don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re letting your emotions cloud your judgement.

You would also rightly be arrested if you assaulted a care worker; you can’t just show up and drive off with a care home resident, father or not.

Your title is clickbait, and your post is disingenuous. It’s not “wow” or “shocking” that people are arrested for assault, and the video is not distressing.

@everybodysang

she was arrested for assault after shoving a care home worker out of the way.

And here is the truth behind the sensation

Your parents are not your property, they are not your to move from place to place as you want. They still have agency until diminished responsibility is proven and have a right to choice. However there is legal precedence for health care and it's provision where people can receive treatment against there and their families wishes. This includes the care setting and hospital if it is seen to be in their best interests for the long and short term.

I'd like to hope anyone here seemingly in support of removing someone in need of care (not by their also aging 70+ child) wouldn't in real life. Would you do the same in a hospital where they were receiving treatment?

We are in the fortunate position that we have some amazing carers in this country who genuinely want to best for the people in their care, so much so that they slept in tents outside the care homes. They are trained to deal with people who are ailing. The people in care homes are also not alone, they have people around them they might be know for years and years. It's not a replacement for family but at least they have their friends.

I hope someone might know the answer to this but is it possible this woman has a DOLs assessment and would that mean the home are responsible for her and can't just let anyone come and collect her?

There are ways to go about this and this was not the way.

The home have a legal duty of care to the lady. They cannot just let her be taken away without social services being aware and in agreement and checks having been made as to the suitability of where she will be staying next and whether or not it meets her care and welfare needs.

You can’t just turn up and remove people, no matter how well intentioned. There need to be safeguards in place to protect vulnerable people from neglect and harm. It doesn’t matter if the daughter is a nurse, they checks still have to be made.

Is the home suitable? Is the bed appropriate for her needs? How will her personal care be done? Showering, toileting? Does she require manual handling and are there sufficiently trained persons at home to achieve this safely? Does she require hoisting and if so is the equipment in place? How will her social and emotional needs be met having been separated her from relationships she may have made in the home? Are their stairs that need to be navigated? Who will provide the care and for how long? What other commitments do they have and is there a limit on how long they can do this for? What happens if they become ill themselves?

These are not necessarily obstacles, but necessary questions that require answering. You have to go through the process. They are there for the protection of our most vulnerable members of society.

@Meadow1203

The video is appalling, what is wrong with people these days. Have you experience of dealing with an relative with Dementia and carehomes? I do in heaps

I do. When I saw this video I instantly thought 'sensationalism'.

Don't get me wrong, the way care homes and relatives of patients have been handled is appalling. However, it's not the care home's fault and they are doing their best to protect and care for other people's family members. They have a right to be trusted to do their jobs with care and attention, they have a right not to be assaulted by relatives breaking all the guidelines, safeguarding protocols and a few laws to get to their loved ones. I have the utmost sympathy for relatives who are worried they won't see their elderly or terminally ill family again, but this was categorically not the way to deal with it.

Should we all be able to take any of our relatives out of their medical care setting when it suits us

It depends if it is a care home or a nursing home. You are probably right when it comes to a medical care setting - ie a nursing home where specialist care is needed.

But a care home is a home not a prison, and residents should be able to come and go as they please, within reason, eg if they have dementia they may need to be kept in for their own safety, but then they are probably on a nursing home with specialist staff rather than a straightforward residential home.

I have seen the video with my own eyes Whereas we all watched it with someone elses?

A bewildered woman is sat in a car, amid the detritus of coffee cups and sandwhich wrappings. Her daughter is arrested, handcuffed in the back of a car, displaying her cuffs somewhat proudly! Her granddaughter is filming the 'horror' and makes an emotional appeal, promising to fight for her, to which the older lady just looks more bemused, and possibly cold!

Yes, it's appalling. Appalling that they decided they could abduct a 97 year old, frail woman with (if they are to be wholly believed) absolutely no forethought, planning, medication plan etc etc.

There are enough indignities in care homes without inventing yet more!

Seconding what @Rinoachicken and @Northofsomewhere say.

And sadly the media are feeding the sensation.

Sadly the home are being made out to be bad guys for trying to keep everyone safe

If you have informed knowledge of care homes then you would absolutely know there are several legal channels and needed safeguarding requirements that mean not every resident can just be released on the whim of their family. Believe me I guarantee in the 20 years I've worked in social care I have more experience than you in these situations. I could give you dozens of experiences where someone on paper looks like they can care for a family member and it has ended horribly , abuse and neglect. There are checks and balances for a reason.

Honestly how dare you wrap this up as you being so very concerned and knowing the real story. OP have you sat with a crying 82 year old who desperately wants to go home but you know they are in the home because their daughter had a breakdown with the understandable stress of caring for a family member and left her alone to the point of near death , causing social services to attend ? Because I have , and you can't tell a scared desperate woman that so you hold her hand , you keep her calm until she feels up to going into another room. Then you do that 30 minutes later because she has forgotten again.

Then another 30 minutes later.

I've had multiple family members "claim " they are capable and where I've had to attend safeguarding afterwards, read court transcripts.

Care is a complex and legally loaded situation where the majority (not all I accept) of professionals work their backside off to do the right thing.

You honestly think waltzing on and giving a half assed version of this to make yourself seem caring is ok? Oh and not to mention that you would happily assault an often exhausted stressed care worker if they were trying to enforce rules. Beautiful. You seriously need to consider your view on this.

I would be extremely surprised if there wasn't an issue here where SS had blocked home for safety reasons.

Come back and witter on when you have any concept of the complexities of care in residential settings or in the home.

They were on This Morning today. Did anyone see it?

So someone was arrested on suspicion of assault (not removing her mother from a care home) and subsequently de arrested.

Move along, nothing to see here.

It's not about what the daughter wants to happen it's about what is the best for the mother. Not just emotionally but physically as well. We do not know she can care for her mother at home as none of us know her mother's needs (quite rightly). I'm a registered elderly care nurse and there are many residents in nursing homes I could not care for in a house by myself (even with carers going in) and that's why they're in cars homes.

She was arrested for assaulting a care home worker.

Family members are not our property. Her mother’s needs come first not hers.

If she was fit to provide home care she can apply for it.

You realise nursing is an extremely varied qualification and doesn’t give a catch-all? Given her actions I’m going to take a guess it wasn’t in dementia care.

Keep your “shocking hun” nonsense in the daily mail comments eh?

I'll be honest, I wouldn't be relying on the D*ily Fail for accurate sources of information.

so we are now arresting people for breaking the law NOW Shocking

They were on This Morning of course a lot of tilting heads and awws, but she did push the care worker the home had a duty of care for a 90 something lady so what were the police to do? Of course the situation is beyond terrible but if she was so upset she could have gone through the proper channels and taken her mother home to live.

@Meadow1203 why did you decide to write that she was arrested for removing her mother, instead of the truth?

The article implies that the deterioration wouldn't have happened if the woman was with her family but there is absolutely no way they could possibly know this. The staff will have had lots of upset relatives desperately trying to see family however I'm sure they've been actively doing everything they can to ensure those who are so susceptible to this virus are kept safe. The police were quite rightly called in this instance after assault of a member of staff. Heartbreaking that this resident was hauled around by family who could have avoided this.