Page 4 | To think that having a quiet understated Christmas is not such a bad thing

Happymum12345 · 31/10/2020 15:07

As a Christian, I really don’t mind having a quiet Christmas. I’m sad that we won’t be able to go to church but no more so than I am each Sunday. I understand that people love getting together with their families and it is normally a lovely time but this awful virus needs to be controlled as much as possible.

RichardMarxisinnocent · 31/10/2020 15:09

And as someone who lives alone, I completely understand how shit it would be spending Christmas alone when you don't want to. Especially with all the inevitable "happy families around the Christmas dinner table" photos which will appear on Facebook.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 31/10/2020 15:10

I'm not particularly bothered but YANBU to only be looking at it from your own point of view.

RichardMarxisinnocent · 31/10/2020 15:12

No one is stealing xmas you still have the traditional dinner, gifts, stockings, decor and everything else just as a nuclear family unit not an extended family party.

Well that's all very well if you have a nuclear family unit to do those things with.

Parker231 · 31/10/2020 15:15

I don’t find a big Christmas stressful but it will be without our overseas family missing - no DD, my parents, sister and her family, no DH’s parents, sister and her family.

stayathomer · 31/10/2020 15:18

It's fair enough point but Christmas is the only time of the year my full family is together. I haven't seen my mum since may and my sister and brother since last Christmas. We'll have a great Christmas but secretly I'll be heartbroken. I think that's more what people are thinking of rather than panicking about things

HelloMissus · 31/10/2020 15:18

FFS - grown adults needing a global pandemic to get the Xmas they want?

SpeccyLime · 31/10/2020 15:20

It’s not about over indulgence, it’s about whether on my first Christmas with my first baby I’ll be able to see the people I love most in the world, or stuck on my own.

No need to assume it’s a mad capitalist panic. Most people only care about seeing their families.

ScarletZebra · 31/10/2020 15:23

YABVU if you can't see that yours isn't the only opinion.

There were supposed to be 12 of us for Xmas Day this year and 14 for Boxing Day. All "immediate family" including 2 toddler DGC whose turn it was to come to us. 3 of our adult DC live miles away, including overseas, and we all look forward to getting together to play games and catch up, especially after not seeing them since last Christmas.

My 80 yo DM lives alone and is constantly worrying about what is going to happen. She's spent most of this year only seeing her next door neighbours. I can assure you she isn't looking forward to a "quiet understated Christmas" this year, to match her quiet understated Easter, Mother's Day, Birthday....

Alaimo · 31/10/2020 15:25

My DH and I currently live in different countries. Of course we strongly hope that we'll be able to spend Christmas together, at that point we'll have lived apart for much of the preceding six months.

It is what it is though. I'd much rather every government would do their best to get covid under control in the long-term so that we can spend prolongued periods with our friends and families, rather than imposing some artificial Christmas deadline. Spending Christmas apart would be sad, but it's just one additional day we're not spending together, we'll manage.

mrsbyers · 31/10/2020 15:30

I’d be perfectly happy to not celebrate it at all if I’m honest as long as I can see my parents in some fashion

AnxMummy10 · 31/10/2020 15:30

We always have one that is just our family. It is more than enough for us. Our family live a few hours drive away and we just refuse to do the travelling and trying to please both sides with small dc. And I firmly believe that small DC are far happier with playing with their toys at home and having their parents attention.
I grew up with the travelling to family and loads of people around. Even when we hosted, I never saw my parents for the day they were too busy cooking and hosting. I really hated it.
Now we just invite family to pop in for the day and if they dont, we still have a grand relaxed day.
Each to their own, this works for us.
Maybe when dc are older then we will change this but for now I feel a quieter, at home tradition works best for us.

blackandwhitemovies · 31/10/2020 15:36

I'll probably be on my own and the thought of it doesn't bother me at all. Some nice food and wine - I'll be perfectly happy.

I know lots wouldn't be, but not all those living alone are the same.

Wimpeyspread · 31/10/2020 15:39

Christmas is just another day. I’ve lived alone for more than 10 years, and much prefer to spend Christmas alone, so am thoroughly glad of the excuse

Jaxhog · 31/10/2020 15:49

We're aiming for a zoom Christmas, which might actually be better than half of us traipsing across the country.

Hardbackwriter · 31/10/2020 15:54

I don't know why people on MN are so adamant that children prefer small Christmases at home - that wasn't my experience at all growing up, when we had Christmas just the four of us it was nowhere near as fun or exciting as when my grandparents and cousins were there too - we had plenty of time just the four of us! My mum definitely preferred it being just the four of us but my brother and I loved the bustle, excitement and attention of a big family Christmas. DS is only two so doesn't really get Christmas anyway but he would so much rather have a day with his cousin (who he adores) and his doting grandparents than with just us. At the moment he keeps asking me in the morning 'we go to nanna grandad house today?' and is always disappointed that it's no, so he's not loving tier 2...

Japa · 31/10/2020 15:58

I totally agree, OP.

And I think we need to accept it for the greater good of society's health.

CodenameVillanelle · 31/10/2020 16:02

@itsgoodtobehome

Everyone seems to be in such a panic about Christmas, and what's going to happen in the current climate. Don't get me wrong, I like Christmas, but I don't have any issue with it being a bit quieter this year. I always find it a bit stressful anyway - the tons of food shopping, presents, wrapping, the extras, who is going where, what's happening on Boxing Day etc. I quite like the idea of having a year off.

After all, it's just a day of over-indulgence. Surely we can all cope without that for 1 year!! AIBU?

Lucky you. Presumably you aren't a single parent with one child for whom a Christmas under lockdown would be miserable and boring and probably ruin the whole thing? My family doesn't have a big stressful expensive indulgent Christmas but we do get together for the only time in the year.

MereDintofPandiculation · 31/10/2020 16:06

YABU. I will enjoy a quiet Christmas. My father, who will be without his family for the first time in his life, will not.

Greydove28 · 31/10/2020 16:11

@scoobyd2

So because I live alone the other 364 days of the year, I should just suck up being alone on Christmas Day? Instead of spending it with family as we have done every year for the past 56 years? Nice....

I know @scoobyd2. The lack of empathy on here for people being lonely is quite astounding.

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander · 31/10/2020 16:16

We had a lovely quiet Christmas last year. I've always spent Christmas with my Mum but as I was, so we thought, happily coupled up, Mum and step-dad booked a holiday over Christmas. The day they booked it DP ended things!
I ended up having Christmas day just me and my teens. It was wonderful! We ate when we wanted, wore pj's most of the day and lazed about playing board games.

I can't wait to do it again

QuestionableDanceMoves · 31/10/2020 16:21

Christmas is my absolute favourite time of year- I have never not woken up at my parents house on Christmas Day in my almost 40 years of life and the thought that this year that might not be the case makes me really sad.
I’m a single parent, I’ve been on furlough since March, was due to go back to work this week but now that looks unlikely- haven’t seen my siblings or parents since august as we all live so far apart (the last time before august was February)
We usually have panto, Santa visits, Christmas markets, school concerts etc and this year there’s nothing.

For me, the thought of Christmas at home alone with just my DC is not something I’m looking forward to at all- especially when I’ve spent the majority of this year at home, alone, with just my DC already

Oliversmumsarmy · 31/10/2020 16:24

Whilst Christmas might be one day it is the run up that we won’t get.

In the spirit of Hands, Face, Space.

No Parties, Pals or Pantos

cologne4711 · 31/10/2020 16:27

I don't care either OP. I only have a small family so if we have to comply with the rule of 6 it makes no difference to us - there are usually 5 of us. If we wanted to see other people we'd go at other times - it doesn't all have to be on the same day and actually it's nicer if you can spread things out a bit. We don't have a big enough house for more people anyway.

As for board games and singing around the piano - (not envy - definitely not my scene).

RedskyAtnight · 31/10/2020 16:27

@scoobyd2

So because I live alone the other 364 days of the year, I should just suck up being alone on Christmas Day? Instead of spending it with family as we have done every year for the past 56 years? Nice....

That's not what I'm saying at all scooby. I'm saying that people set too much store by meeting up on a particular day. If you're a person that lives alone but regularly meets with/talks to and is part of an extended loving family/friendship group for 364 days of the year, then not meeting on Christmas Day surely isn't that much of a huge big deal? If your family/friends don't bother with you for 364 days a year so the only time you get to see them on Christmas Day I can see that is very upsetting for you - but the issue is then on you not meeting people generally, not the fact that it's Christmas.

Many people say that the important thing about Christmas is meeting up with family and loved ones - but there is normally no reason why you can't do this on any other date that is not Christmas! This year I've missed meeting my parents on March 30th, April 17th, May 26th, July 17th (yes, I'm picking dates at random, but these were dates when I couldn't meet them due to coronavirus related restrictions). Not being able to meet them on Christmas Day will be no more or less significant than not meeting them on any other one of these other dates.