To defer my Summer born daughter’s school start date?

[ThornAmongstRoses]

I have a daughter who should be starting school next September but she will have only turned 4 about a week before the start date.

For the last few months I have seriously been thinking about delaying her starting until the following year when she will have just turned 5.

I have done so much reading up around the subject and it’s quite clear that statistically (because I know there will always be exceptions) starting school after just turning 4 can be very detrimental to their education and achievements through their schooling compared to Autumn, Winter and Spring borns.

My husband is a teacher and is absolutely on board with the deferral.

I mentioned it to my brother a few days ago as his child is summer born (a year behind mine) and he totally laughed me off.

He said it was a pointless thing to do and if the younger kids struggle then it’s down to the parents to do more at home with them.

It was a bit of a black and white attitude I thought.

I told him that if it was as simple as doing some work at home to get the Summer borns to the same level as their peers, then there wouldn’t be so much information out there about the disparities between Summer borns and other children.

I’m not being unreasonable to consider this though am I?

I do understand there will always be exceptions and there will be many stories abouthigh achieving Summer born children, but that doesn’t detract from the fact that overall, Summer Born children do fare worse at school if they start when they have just turned four years old.

My brother has made me doubt myself

Check what happens after year 6, does the local authority allow the missed year to continue through secondary or will your child have to miss year 7 ? Are you in a 11+ area because if so you might have to miss year 6 to apply.

Yes, this is the big reason why we'll only defer DS if we really feel strongly that he'll struggle otherwise - we live in a grammar area and as things currently stand he'd essentially lose the chance to go to the grammar. I think things might well change in the next 8 years in that regard, but I wouldn't want to bet on it.

@MintyMabel

The stimga of having been "held back" is a big one

The 70's called- they want their attitude back.

Kids haven't changed much since the 70s, they're still pretty damn mean a lot of the time!

@overTheRainbow88 - so you don't want to give your child an extra year to prepare you just want them to be oldest and someone else's kid the youngest. Do those who think their child should be allowed into reception the following year not get that that makes an issue worse ??

I think it depends on the child whether reception or another year at nursery is the best thing for them but allowing children to stagger start times within the year might help. When I was 4 summer borns were allowed to start in January

(Summer born, top grades throughout school, Oxbridge degree)

I have a late August son and if it was a choice back in his day I would have definitely deferred. He's in secondary school and academically average but the first few years of school were tough and it would have been better for his confidence to be the oldest in the year below.

I think it depends on the child whether reception or another year at nursery is the best thing for them but allowing children to stagger start times within the year might help. When I was 4 summer borns were allowed to start in January

The evidence is that this is the worst of all solutions. They're still the youngest but now also have a term less time in reception to prepare for year 1. There's a reason schools stopped doing that.

Other than her date of birth, you don't say anything about your daughter herself.

This a good point - i think it depends on the child and how socially confident and intelligent he is. At 3, although you can't make a confident statement about how he will cope academically at school, you must have an idea of his intelligence compared to his peers. And then secondly, how is he socially? He's probably going to nursery now so you can see how he's coping with that and how he finds interacting with the others. If he seems happy and he's confident with other children then that's a good sign for starting school.

My DD is a late August birthday and has just started reception. We did consider deferral (mostly because people kept bloody asking us all the time) but were of the view that we wouldn’t pursue it unless there were obvious reasons why she might be best held back. We couldn’t see any and went ahead. Happy with our decision so far.

I honestly think it’s just such an individual choice. You do you as the saying goes.

I do wonder how sustainable the policy is though. As if you do decide to keep your summer born in the “correct” group as we have done, then not only will they be almost a year younger than some of their classmates, they could potentially be with a child/children almost 15 months older than them too.

The thing is there has to be a cut off date somewhere and this just moves that around.

Again, this is a personal view but I do feel there is a lot to teach our daughter in the adage of “well someone has to be the youngest”. Because that applies for tallest/cleverest etc and all other variables through life.

@Hardbackwriter

I think it depends on the child whether reception or another year at nursery is the best thing for them but allowing children to stagger start times within the year might help. When I was 4 summer borns were allowed to start in January

The evidence is that this is the worst of all solutions. They're still the youngest but now also have a term less time in reception to prepare for year 1. There's a reason schools stopped doing that.

You do still have the right to hold the Reception place and start at a later point in the academic year. Some schools may agree to flexi schooling. A September ft start is not the only option.

Anyhow - I’m off to work now, thank you for all your thoughts and I will catch up with them when I’m back tonight.

I am August born and did struggle. I know now that I am bright and academically very capable but I still have a lack of confidence from my early years in education. I went to a top university as a mature student. I found that the mature students heavily skewed towards summer borns who spent their lives thinking they were a bit thick.

I don't think you can discount the social side even if the child is fine academically. I missed out on so much in my final year of 6th form. While my friends started going to pubs and clubs I was the one stuck at home!

What always make me laugh about these threads is all the August borns who didn't struggle so think the whole thing is rubbish. Top of the class, Oxbridge degree etc. but still don't understand how statistics work!

I am very relieved my child has a September birthday.

It really depends on the child. I have a September born who was as ready as any of the children in the year above her for school, but had to stay at nursery. I do think it would have been better for her to be in the year above, but that isn't an option.

Your child isn't a statistic to you, so don't make your decision based on just the statistics.

Honestly? Childrens development is not solely linear and time based. A child who is not naturally of an academic persuasion wont necessarily magically "mature" to be more academic during that extra year.

A friend held her son, a july birthday, back. He seemed ahead the following september but within 6 months slid behind his classmates because he is simply a slower learner on academic areas. He is now 8 and it has knocked his confidence as he feels he "should" be keeping up because be is older, and in fact he isnt.

With good motor skills, plus being quite loud I'd probably lean towards not deferring - having good fine motor skills seems to be the biggest frustration in early years for kids - knowing how you should be writing but not having the strength must be so frustrating!

Are the kids at the childminder either side of the cut off? Or mostly one side? If most are off to school this year she'd likely miss them if she stays on...

Reception teacher here.
Just to echo the previous posters who've said this should be based on your individual child's circumstances not the research.
I wrote my thesis on season of birth and yes whilst a small percentage of summerborn children lag behind their peers beyond KS1, this is in many cases because they would have struggled anyway due to SEN, EAL, and various other factors that are then compounded by being the youngest in their peer group.
If your daughter has no issues other than being born in Aug then I you should send her. The curriculum in EYFS is flexible and play based. Reception teachers are usually well aware of which children in the class are summer born and will adapt things accordingly.

I am August born and did struggle. I know now that I am bright and academically very capable but I still have a lack of confidence from my early years in education.

I know september borns who feel the same way for various reasons. Someone is always going to be youngest in any cohort. My mum (primary teacher) always said she understood it for some boys where there was a genuine developmental issue - some who really struggled dressing themselves, toileting issues, socially less mature than peers, but said she rarely saw those issues with girls.

Definitely check what happens at secondary school, and if this varies by area, e.g. what would happen if you move for work at a later date.
I'd say if they have to skip a year later, that's much worse.

I deferred/decelerated my son. He was very shy and not a fan of preschool, or anything involving lots of people. So I wanted him to have an extra year in EYFS. We have had no issues. He was born in the last week of August and his two best friends aren't far behind. But he gets on brilliantly with the summer borns in his class. The only issue we have had is he played football in an older age group which he was unbothered by.

At the time, when I was doubting myself
I reminded myself that people in Ireland have the choice with a summer born school start, and it's not the huge issue it is presented as here.

My DD was very confident and couldn't wait to get to school. I wouldn't have deferred her. So IMO it depends on your child and your gut feeling about it. If this is different to your brother in law's just ignore him and do what you think is right

we have a September born and an August born daughter, so oldest was two weeks off turning 5 when she started school and youngest was 4 years and 2 weeks when she started.
The youngest was ( and still is ) tiny, but that made no difference at all - she would have probably still been one of the smallest girls in the year group below if she'd delayed a year
The differences quickly levelled out and by the end of year 2 there was no discernible difference to their learning levels.
That's going back a few years now though, they have both left University with 1st this year (oldest took a gap year).
Good luck with what ever you decide

I was a summer born baby and, had I had any dimmer burns myself, I would absolutely have deferred them starting school for a year. Nothing more miserable than seeing very young children start their educational career by gaining an unduly negative impression of their abilities because they are just not quite as school ready as their peers.

I was an academic child so the work itself was no problem. Socially though, emotionally, that year would have made a big difference.

My DS could have been a certified child genius and there’s still no way he’d have started school at just turned 4. Reception may be play based but not as much as it used to be and year 1 is a shock with no play at all.

If school starting age was later the age difference wouldn’t be so bad. I wouldn’t care if my DS was youngest if school starting age was 6 for example.

DS is a summer born.

We had been living in the US and returned to the UK during the middle of what should have been Y2 for him.

I'd always been very, very keen to defer him having, like you, done all the research on how summer born children have poorer outcomes. Added to this, he was (is) physically small, had (has) some minor speech issues, and having been in the US he had effectively missed a year of school (schooling starts a year later in the US).

The head at his new school was extremely open minded, and happy for him to join either Y1 or Y2 according to what we as his parents felt was the right fit. I contacted the LEA to check that he wouldn't be forced to skip a year at secondary entry, and they confirmed that he would be able to remain in his 'adopted' year group. So we were good to go with the deferred entry, although my DH had some reservations.

Despite all of the reasons above, it was obvious from the first day really that he just was on a different level from the other children in his class, academically and socially. Even though he was smaller than most of them, it stood out a mile. After two weeks, the school gently suggested that really he would be better in his age-based class, and we were happy to agree.

Two years on it was absolutely the right decision. That doesn't mean to say I think it is ideal, though. I don't doubt that the research is right, and that he isn't being best served by being in a class with children who are nearly a year older than him. Ideally, he would have gone into Y1.5, if such a thing could exist. But for him it is definitely the better of the two choices.

Also, as an aside, by elder DD is in a class at the same school with a boy who deferred entry and so is a year older than the other children. The other children are definitely aware of it, and although I wouldn't say he is teased as such, it is definitely a 'thing'.

I guess what I am saying is that don't assume that deferring will automatically make everything better - it brings its own complications and the reality is that both options will have their drawbacks.

Dimmer burns? summer borns

I swear my auto correct is trying to sabotage me.

I have a summer born boy in year 2 and it would have been so much better for him if we'd deferred to start reception a year later. At the time our LA wouldn't allow deferrals to start in reception so we had no choice.

Socially he's absolutely fine, loves school and has a great group of friends. Reception was no problem as they mostly just free play with lots of time in playground. The problem is in year 1 and now year 2 they really crank up the learning. He's now hugely behind in reading, writing and maths. This wouldn't bother me as I'm sure he'll catch up eventually but the problem is he's very aware that he can't keep up and isn't as good as most of the others. I worry this will affect his confidence and self esteem. I'm pretty sure he sits in the class pretty lost on what they're meant to be doing a lot of the time.

I really wish we'd been able to defer.

You know your child best. My sons going to be 3 in December. If he was August baby and just three months older. He would be starting in September 2021. He's absolutely not anywhere near ready. He's not even started potty training. He's just starting to talk in more sentences. He's still very baby like and innocent. I think covid hasn't helped at all. I've not been able to concentrate on him because my older child was off school. I've also not been able to do anywhere near as much socialising with him as I hoped. It's quite sad really.

So yeah whilst my first child was very ready. I would also be considering the same as you with my second if I needed too. All children vary.

What I will say to you though is my daughter was 4.5 and fully ready to mix and stuff. But she didn't click onto the routine as quickly as some children. She went through a stage where she was being reminded constantly what to do next. But she picked it up just before coronavirus. The main thing was that reception was play based. She wasn't particularly writing and able to work things out but she was in her element with the art table. The role play toys. The bikes. The pet guinea pig. The stories. Pe. Even lunch! She loved it. She liked the environment. So if you think your little girl would love the play. The atmosphere etc. Then she would love going. I really do understand where you are coming from though.

Also remember she will change loads in six months.

I'm waiting on her parents evening next week to find out how she's doing in year one.