To ask if you have a thigh gap?

[user18594]

I need some reassurance that it's quite normal to not have a thigh gap.. it's my biggest problem area!

I'm not much over 5ft tall, weigh around 7st 10.. six 6 due to my small frame but wouldn't say I was slim, probably in proportion, definitely have a bit of a belly and yeah the thighs... as they go up, they curve in together and touch.

I know I'm an idiot.. constantly comparing myself to others and how their legs seem to be not smooshing together at the top!

I'm early thirties but don't remember ever having one.. is it true that the majority of
Women don't and I'm just being overly perfectionist with this?

Yes I know first world problems.. but I feel like I look horrendous in shorts and had to get it off my chest today!

Nope, despite being a bit underweight.
But because I have pretty narrow hips, there's just no room for a gap.

I'm sure you look fab in shorts!
And don't say you're an idiot, you're not, you're a human being, a woman on top of that, we're constantly exposed to perfection, even more than before now because social media and it can be distressing to feel like we don't fit.

I was like you until pretty recently (I'm early 40s) and can still have my moments where I'm like "I'm the ugliest person in the world, why people don't throw stones at me is beyond me".
I've practiced mindfulness, gratitude and self-awareness a lot and it really helped me to let it go.

Perfectionism is a pain, not a virtue.

Thank you to everyone who wasn't rude in their reply and shared their thoughts. No need for some of the harsher comments I don't think, be kind! I guess we do all have our thing we worry about and some (ie. me) ponder over it more than others!

I know I need to work on my self esteem and thought asking about this and getting some understanding would help me put it to bed. If anyone has any tips on how to get better with it I'm all ears! To be honest... until it was mentioned to me I almost everyone felt this way about themselves, I didn't realise it was unusual or unhealthy.

I really appreciate everyone sharing, it's helped me understand it a bit more. I'm not saying we must have to have thigh gaps. I don't have wide hips at all and my thighs/legs are shorter and rounder in general but I'm not saying that's a bad thing. Guess it just depends where the weight goes. I just feel very self conscious in shorts, but probably need to just tone my thighs more rather than expecting a thigh gap that I'll never have!

I guess I just feel like in clothes I don't look too bad, but without clothes my body shape is nowhere near as polished.. perhaps that's normal!

Love the idea that only flamingos need to have them :-)

Don'tgobaconmyheart - thanks for the book recommendation I'll take a look

When you say you thought almost everyone felt this way, do you mean about the thigh gap?

I used to pre-DS2, now I don't. Tbh I was a bit too skinny (not on purpose, just had no car and bf DS1 till he was a toddler).

@Strangedays20

When you say you thought almost everyone felt this way, do you mean about the thigh gap?

No I meant about their bodies and generally having shitty self esteem!

Thigh gaps are down to the shape and width of the pelvis. Nothing to do with weight.

Yes! For the first time ever! I've weighed less before and been smaller but I started running and I've got one now. I'm 5 ft 7 and size 8 to 10. So leg muscles for me. Tbh I don't think it makes me more attractive than when I didn't have one, although I like the shape of my legs now. I'd like a smaller waist to hip ratio and no stomach overhang😬. But I'm 48 now and not gonna complain!

Even when I was a size 6 I didn’t have a thigh gap!! And I’m 170cm so was very skinny!

I just have small hips tbh. If I had wider hips and my legs were set wider apart maybe I would have thigh gap.

Anyway, you are being extremely unreasonable for being concerned about such a silly physical factor. Like really, really silly. One day, you might have a real problem and thigh gaps will be the least of your concerns!

@workhomesleeprepeat

Even when I was a size 6 I didn’t have a thigh gap!! And I’m 170cm so was very skinny!

I just have small hips tbh. If I had wider hips and my legs were set wider apart maybe I would have thigh gap.

Anyway, you are being extremely unreasonable for being concerned about such a silly physical factor. Like really, really silly. One day, you might have a real problem and thigh gaps will be the least of your concerns!

This is just unnecessary. What's to say I don't have real problems.. I'm not saying my life is so perfect and this is my issue in life. That's a huge assumption, how ridiculous!

I’m overweight and have chub rub😢

I do but whilst I am slim I'm not super skinny. I agree it's down to bone structure - I also have a very prominent rib cage and clavicle.

I do, it's my body shape though not because I am slim, I am not particularly slim

No, I've never had one and couldn't even if I got really skinny, I have short, chunky legs.

Although I'm now confused having RTFT as I don't have wide hips - the opposite in fact, I'm an inverted triangle.

I used to have a thigh gap but now I don't bother.

Chick, I strongly suspect I might still get chub rub even with a thigh gap! I've a gap right at the top but then my legs meet together again and then another gap. And I get hot in the summer. I've still got the culottes slips from when I was bigger and still wear them! I got red dry skin on the underside of my arms and neck I suspect from sweat pooling when I run. I have to slather on the moisturiser and oil to protect my skin!

Well apologies if that’s what I absorbed from you OP, it did seem that this was a big, big problem for you. Maybe I came across a bit strong there at the end-sorry!

I used to be very concerned with what my body looked like, until I actually became seriously ill, and then I felt very silly for being critical of my healthy body!

Gree do you have muscular legs? I have narrow hips but got one from running.

Why would you want a thigh gap?
I think they look horrible.
I've been slim most of my life and never had one and never want one.

I think they look horrible

I wouldn't say horrible (I'm gorgeous!) but legs without one can look equally fantastic!

Another one here with wide hips and wide thigh gap

@likeamillpond

Why would you want a thigh gap? I think they look horrible. I've been slim most of my life and never had one and never want one.

Gee, thanks. You realise you're insulting a large number of posters on here and women in general for our natural appearance?

I've got a massive thigh gap (can easily get my fist between my thighs all the way up). I've got skinny legs and quite wide hips! My mum has the same build and still has a thigh gap at 78. The gap would be smaller if my legs were fatter or more muscular, but they would have to be disproportionately big for the gap to close entirely. So I think it's definitely down to how you are built...

No. Most women can't have one naturally unless on a very restrictive diet. It's not womanly to have one, just another obsessive to make your body look more childlike.

Really hate all this crap.

Why would you want a thigh gap?
I think they look horrible.
I've been slim most of my life and never had one and never want one

Aw thanks, you’re too kind.