To be really angry that seeing my parents is illegal?

[Snailsetssail]

My area is very likely to be locked down next week. I am so furious that it’s going to be against the law for me to see my parents, and my children to see their grandparents. We did lockdown properly last time, it was absolutely awful. My mental health plummeted and I don’t think I can do it again. I rely on support from family and friends.

Just feeling so incredibly angry about it all tonight. Poor people in Leicester have lived like this for 100 days so far with no end in site.

I’m so fed up and I know I’m going to be told to just get on it it. But I just need a space to vent.

@Essexgirlupnorth

the lockdown hasn't worked
The problem really is that we never had a proper lockdown. That's why things are so bad. If we'd had a strict initial lockdown WITH restricted borders, we'd be back to relative normal by now. Like Australia, New Zealand, and the Isle of Man.

[quote WinifredSanderson]@Belladonna12 so they should just suck it up then? Get on and die of cancer because of a virus that's been massively oversold to the general public? [/quote]

How do people access cancer treatment when Covid has spread through the hospital (as has happened many times - with many infections picked up from hospital)?

Who treats the cancer patients when beds are full and staff off sick (Covid, Long Covid, or PTSD)?

If we want cancer treatment and diagnoses, we need to contain Covid.

Minimalising Covid is what will cause an increase in cancer deaths.

[quote WinifredSanderson]@BackBeatTheWordisOnTheStreet there are already no other treatments available even with lesser cases of covid in hospitals!! Or did you not read the part where I said my relatives have had their cancer treatments halted?? [/quote]
That's awful. And exactly why it's urgent that we contain Covid asap. Failing to do so is what's led us here.

Unfortunately it's a catch 22 for vulnerable people like cancer patients. Obviously extra vulnerable to Covid already, the last thing they need is to catch it in hospital.

The kind of "individual freedom over community wellbeing" in so many of the comments here is the sort of thinking which explains why you never really had lockdown there, and why you are now being told to step up to a proper lockdown.

@pobble2019

The kind of "individual freedom over community wellbeing" in so many of the comments here is the sort of thinking which explains why you never really had lockdown there, and why you are now being told to step up to a proper lockdown.

Yes this.

OP, I understand that you're angry. But it's about collective action, not individual.

I live in SE, low infection rates. But because we are a household of six, we can see no one (unless we split up, but ages of children mean that's not massively practical). My parents live in NE and are in their 80s, so we can't see them (due to
Local restrictions) and, even if we could, I wouldn't put them at risk without ensuring the children hadn't been with friends for the preceding two weeks, so the earliest we'll be able to do it is end of Christmas holidays. We have seen my parents twice this year, DH's once.

I am shattered, lockdown with 4DC and work and little time away have a cumulative effect. But there is nothing we can do about it. I am conscious of what they are missing out on, time and opportunities that they won't get back. But it won't be forever. I am sorry that you are struggling and totally get where you are coming from but can't help but feel that unless people stop finding reasons why they shouldn't/can't comply, this is just going to keep going on.

I hope you are ok, it is awful.

I do comply but strongly feel that state inference in who you can see in your own home is too far. Far too far. Appallingly far and it shows how mandated people are down the line of state interference.

If this goes on much longer legal action will be taken and I would be the first to contribute to the funding of it. My parents are in their seventies and time is so so precious with grandchildren. Every day counts and we have wasted 6 months already.

I wouldn’t want to see grand parents now whatever the state told me to do. My child is in school where there are Covid cases and obviously don’t want to pass on the virus. I don’t need the state to tell me that.

I think a legal challenge to restrictions on personal freedoms can’t be far away

That’s great McMuffins.

My parents have told me they would rather die than not see family another six months. That’s their perogative

Luckily my parents and in laws and both sensible. We prefer to follow the rules. I wouldn’t want them to die a horrible death alone in hospital from Covid if it was preventable. Dead grand parents also cannot see their grand children .

I suspect some poster's relatives will actually be relieved that they're not going to visit them. And not because of Covid.

[quote WinifredSanderson]@Belladonna12 so they should just suck it up then? Get on and die of cancer because of a virus that's been massively oversold to the general public? [/quote]
You're the one who thinks they should just suck it up and die of cancer if you think we should just let Covid rip through the population. If hospitals are full of people needing emergency treatment, how do you think they are going to treat people with other less urgent conditions (by less urgent I mean conditions that aren't going to kill them within the next few days)?. Not only will there be no beds, but people who do go to hospital may catch Covid themselves and many including cancer patients will be vulnerable.

I do comply but strongly feel that state inference in who you can see in your own home is too far. Far too far. Appallingly far and it shows how mandated people are down the line of state interference.

If this goes on much longer legal action will be taken and I would be the first to contribute to the funding of it. My parents are in their seventies and time is so so precious with grandchildren. Every day counts and we have wasted 6 months already.

I could not agree with you more.

@MrsMcMuffins

Luckily my parents and in laws and both sensible. We prefer to follow the rules. I wouldn’t want them to die a horrible death alone in hospital from Covid if it was preventable. Dead grand parents also cannot see their grand children .

That's how I feel, as do my parents. They would rather not see their grandchildren for a few months if it means they can see them and their children for another 10 years or so.

Can you not move in together temporarily? That might be a solution if your mental health relies heavily on this relationship.

How are those people that need help with childcare getting on

@Clappingforjoy

How are those people that need help with childcare getting on

Where I live (we have been in lockdown for a while ) they can still see grandparents if they provide childcare, I think.

Yeah they can now. For several weeks that was illegal, at least where I am. How people managed is that they did it anyway, because the economy couldn't function without informal childcare networks even before coronavirus drastically reduced the number of places available in the formal childcare sector.

@WinifredSanderson

Pretty sure I already said covid isn't flu. So does it not matter that 8,000 people died of flu then? 8,000 people who were alive at the beginning of last year had caught flu because SOMEONE passed it to them. Thoroughly preventable if we locked down every flu season. You don't seem to bothered about those peoples lives. So only people who die of covid count then?

@WinifredSanderson

People on here have explained things much more eloquently that I have, but you still don’t seem to be getting it?

Us nhs staff want to be able to provide treatment to those with other non-covid conditions, such as cancer etc, but if we are overwhelmed with covid patients this will not happen.

We are still working through the backlog from the March/April lockdown when our departments were all closed and we were redeployed to the wards. We are living under the constant stress that this could happen again soon, we don’t want to cancel all our clinics again.

Do you really think things would be better to just let people get on with living their lives (aka herd immunity)?

We came very close to being overwhelmed in March/April, with lots of very poorly patients and lots of staff off sick. Without lockdown I can’t imagine what would have happened.

Maybe we should bring back evacuation? Test your children, if they're clear they get shipped off to New Zealand. You don't know when you'll see them again but it will build stoicism and resilience.

50 000 flu deaths in winter 17/18, so actually somewhat compatible.
But since those people didn't die of covid, it didn't count. Or something.

^This definitely. But this is precisely why there is a risk of the NHS being overwhelmed; we're in the flu season again. That's why there has been a push for people to have the flu jab.

Yes, flu can already cause the NHS to be overwhelmed. Covid deaths on top will make things much much worse as the death rate is even higher. Only about 7% of the population were infected with covid in the first wave and it still killed about 50,000. If 70% of the population were infected at once that means it could kill 500,000. If the NHS is overwhelmed people will die of other disease too.

@pobble2019

The kind of "individual freedom over community wellbeing" in so many of the comments here is the sort of thinking which explains why you never really had lockdown there, and why you are now being told to step up to a proper lockdown.

This, in spades.

I haven't seen my parents since January as they live abroad (flight, or a drive through four countries). I cannot go because of cunts who care about their individual rights more than the collective wellbeing of those around them. I would be exposed to said cunts and thus risk my parents' health (healthy but a COVID risk category).

The only exception to the rule should be elderly, infirm and or terminally ill people who have little time left. If none of those apply then stay the fuck at home. Because your 1 month of feeling upset is my ongoing lived reality since March.

@pobble2019
“The kind of "individual freedom over community wellbeing" in so many of the comments here is the sort of thinking which explains why you never really had lockdown there, and why you are now being told to step up to a proper lockdown.”

Completely agree with you, so many feel entitled to do as they please, or that they are exempt for various reasons.

I agree with @acatcalledjohn that the only exemptions should be the elderly, infirm and terminally ill. Also those with severe mental health issues.