To think this pandemic has provided deep insight into people's character?

[rosesbloom]

I have found it quite illuminating seeing people's reactions. Friends and family members I have known for years have surprised me. It is like this situation has acted like a catalyst to reveal people's true nature, values and character.

A friend I had known for years and thought was a kind and empathetic person said the vulnerable just need to accept that they will die if they catch it and everything needs to carry on as normal. I have an underlying health condition she doesn't know about. I just sat there in stunned silence.

It has even shown me things about myself I didn't realise. It has shown me how anxious I am about my health, usually all those worries are internal and I keep them to myself but they have had to be brought out into the light when I explain to friends/family why I don't feel comfortable going for a meal in a restaurant at the moment despite it being "allowed" and "COVID-19 secure". Even though I know I engage in risky behaviours all the time like driving a car, crossing a road, etc it is like I have a blind spot with accurately assessing COVID risks.

Have any of you had any surprising revelations from people?

Things like this bring out the best and worst in people. That said personal circumstances really can alter your perceptions on what is right - for example I see my kids (at university) futures being ruined because they haven't had the teaching they were meant to have resulting in them getting poor grades (the lecturer strikes for 3 weeks prior to lockdown exasperated this) and my dd with mental health issues isn't getting the support she needs to function resulting in a breakdown, avoiding sectioning by a whisker (because my mother was able to supervise her 24/7) and there's a bit of me that thinks this is all so my 87 year old who already is life limited with cancer can live a few more months. Yes that's selfish but wanting my kids to have 60 years of good life vs his 6 months is a trade off I'm willing to accept and interestingly older friends (in their 80's) agree that they should be isolating, getting supported as required, and the rest of us can go back to living, my 81 year old friend has gone as far as writing to our mp suggesting just this.

Nobody is right or wrong here, nobody wants to deliberately kill of older people it's down to where the responsibility lays and should we have to stop doing x so they can go weekly to the supermarket??? Tough decisions need to be made because another lockdown is not affordable

@Kljnmw3459

Not really, I already knew who would be an anxious mess, who would sail through the lockdown without many problems and who would oppose to any restrictions to civil liberties.

The only person that has surprised me is a friend who has gone full conspiracy theorist due to this. I hope it's temporary.

I've one of the latter in my social circle. Surprisingly she's actually had Covid.

Oh yes. And not in a good way.

But also in a good way. The way the community have stepped up round our way has been amazing. MIL's neighbours who previously had been quite arsey about stuff have made sure she has anything she needs. People who I haven't spoken to for years because they were selfish twats, who live near my parents, got in contact with me to see if there was anything I needed them to do to help. The number of young people who stepped up and volunteered or took jobs in supermarkets or as delivery drivers when they really didn't have to.

It is too easy and predicable for people to insist everyone is shit and this brings out the worst in people, it has also brought out the best in many others.

[quote Holyrivolli]@Calabasa. Well stay at home then. Fuck everyone who works in those industries and their families. Doesn’t bother you if they all lose their homes and livelihoods. Is that what you’re really saying? Just as long as you’re in your home with your comforts and your shopping being delivered?[/quote]
Of course it bothers me, and i wish that people could be sensible so those venues could operate and stay open so people didnt lose jobs, businesses and livelihoods. I desperately wish there was some way things could be managed so it wasn't an issue and there were no job losses.

But the scenes of hundreds of people coming out of the bars and nightclubs and partying in the street, falling down drunk, no social distancing, unfortunately prove people just aren't capable of being sensible when they're out.

I am singularly horrified at how selflish people are being while they're out, not thinking about anyone else, or how their behaviour is impacting on the hospitality industry, because their actions are why the government are going to end up closing the bars/restaurants again!

So i will reclarify... i think people should stay the fuck home if they can't behave like responsible adults while still having a social life.

I dont get my shopping delivered either btw.. i am the only one in my family not high risk, so i've been the one going out to do the shopping over this whole period.

Couldn't agree more OP. The competitive misery has been eye opening.

I too am very depressed about people’s nastiness - or downright madness. Do you remember all those threads months ago with people screeching about others going out for a walk or sitting on a park bench?

We have been “zoom distancing” (ie tinkly laugh, the internet’s not working) with a family member who is the high priest of lockdown. Been hiding since March, and decrees that everyone should lock down harder, close all pubs/restaurants/schools. They, meanwhile, live in a large house with grounds and with large secure income. They seem fine with people producing, retailing and delivering their food, utility workers, water, etc . The last straw was when they were pontificating that “we should all be content with less” . The bloody cheek of it.

@SoUtterlyGroundDown

This is a silly comment - one person delivering shopping safely to the doorsteps of 20 people a day is much safer for society as a whole than all 20 of those people going and mixing in public. We also pay police officers and doctors/nurses and fire fighters and roofers and drivers etc to take risks we don't want to or can't take ourselves

Except a person choosing to become a police officer, or fire fighter, or roofer knows the risks involved before choosing that occupation. A supermarket food picker doesn’t.
The point is that people are crying for ‘strict lockdown’, not even acknowledging the fact that that isn’t possible if they want to remain fed (food delivered to them safely in their houses at their convenience), with functioning electricity and water supplies, and emergency services there if they need it.

I really don't understand the British obsessive judging of grocery deliveries. There is enough capacity now. Tesco doubled their online grocery staff, and other chains have done similarly, so half of the staff knew what they were signing up for. Plus if all those getting their groceries delivered were in the real-life shop, those shops would be a lot busier. The staff currently driving around safe in their vans making deliveries would be back inside stores. Surely those getting their groceries delivered are benefitting others as much as themselves. And there is some job creation, although I accept this is low-paid, but there aren't many sectors that are expanding right now and creating job vacancies. More people in store equals more queuing, more germs in an indoor setting, more staff needed in-store. It is a valid service, just like getting your milk delivered by the milk man.

But 'older' and 'vulnerable' people are also working in.. 'industries which have been crushed due to lockdown restrictions to sacrifice their livelihoods and futures for something that doesn’t really affect them. With no end in sight'.., and have the added Brucie bonus of being hit worse with Covid.

It obviously isn’t making things safer for retail workers if you go to the shops rather than getting things delivered.

Supermarket pickers work alongside the public shopping.

It isn’t a virtue to shop in person rather than via delivery.

I've seen more good than bad among my own (admittedly tiny) circle and my immediate neighbourhood. Online is a different story, FB groups for the wider area are rife with selfishness, opposing views, opportunism and pious judgement. I was isolated before Covid but I'm keeping to my safe little bubble of nice people more than ever now, the world outside it seems very unappealing these days.

Even though I know I engage in risky behaviours all the time like driving a car, crossing a road, etc it is like I have a blind spot with accurately assessing COVID risks.

The human brain is terrible at risk assessment. We tend to make such judgements on the basis of emotion, not a sober analysis of the facts.

Surely most disabled people are already used to having to prove their need to be exempt in all sorts of situations? Parking, skipping a queue, using the disabled loo. Why is it suddenly such an ordeal in this particular situation?

Proof in parking, PIP, and things like that comes from medical professionals and is checked by another professional who should have appropriate training - a traffic warden, a council employee when getting disabled parking in front of one's house, and so on.

HCPs aren't providing evidence so there is no ordeal to go through and most people aren't trained to know what to do with it anyways. Random people on the street cannot judge medical evidence.

Queue-jumping often doesn't require evidence, it depends on the place. There is a joke about 'miracle flights' when people request a wheelchair so they can board first on airplanes, but walk off a flight because those who actually need wheelchairs come off last so no longer a benefit.

One doesn't need to prove anything to use a disabled loo or to buy a RADAR key - charities and councils sell them. Also, don't need proof to buy and use a mobility aide. Don't need proof to request reasonable adjustments at work - it may be requested, but neither I, my spouse, or my lodger have ever had that happened. We've just been taken at our word, partially because, as I've been told before, they wouldn't know what to do with a bunch of diagnoses anyways, let alone a list of 'being investigated for' and a doctors assessment with overlapping conditions paint a bleak picture, so I'm expected to advocate for my needs myself. Just as people who can't wear a mask.

Outside of a medical situation - where it's more being observed rather than my proving anything - I haven't had to prove anything related to my disabilities in years and not entirely sure how with some of them.

Grocery delivery was an example. I have absolutely no issue with grocery delivery services, obviously. That would be weird.
The wider point was about those who are calling for a ‘strict lockdown’ without acknowledging that vast numbers of people have to go out to work to keep them comfortably fed and watered in their houses.

Indeed. I don't discuss my feelings on covid as they're conflicting. I don't spy or neighbours or stare if a person has no mask none of it.
My friend has really surprised me, she is very underweight she has an autoimmune disease she saw my DM leaving by ambulance semi conscious grey in colour 2 days before she died of Covid.
Her elderly aunt died in her NH.
I've really turned off her, she's against masks again it's not my business if she refuses to wear one, her DC's bubble had a cluster she took him for the test and let him out to play for 3 days while awaiting results. Thankfully it was a negative result but still.

Tje winging has got to me most. Ffs...my grandad was in a Hapenese Pow camp for 3 years and my nan got bombed in the blitz. Both bounced back and led happy, long lives. Then we winge as pubs shut at 10pm .
We are living in one of the richest nations in the world. We will survive.

Japenese

I have seen mainly positive lovely things in the people I see day to day. Like the lovely pharmacist who gave me a repeat prescription of something for my dc to save me having to take them to the doctor last March. Like the teachers at our school. Like the community of old neighbours.

But I would have to say the one thing that has deeply shocked me is just how many people did not bother to get informed with the bonafied research, just how many times in March the same thing had to be reiterated in threads about what was needed to be done at that point, and how many people treated the people doing their best to inform others as scare mongering (ie I am talking about the people trying to share bonafide research as opposed to those who were preaching doom and gloom).

But in summary, I look back at how many people pulled together for the greater good, including some pretty impressive action from some governments, and how many people bothered to post humour on the 'net to help keep people's pecker up, with pride and hope for the human race, actually.

@malificent7

Tje winging has got to me most. Ffs...my grandad was in a Hapenese Pow camp for 3 years and my nan got bombed in the blitz. Both bounced back and led happy, long lives. Then we winge as pubs shut at 10pm . We are living in one of the richest nations in the world. We will survive.

The person I know who was in a POW camp came home and committed suicide. No resilience, eh?

@SoUtterlyGroundDown OK, you are right, but you did sound a bit chippy about groceries and other posters had said similar.
Even ICU nurses like online groceries - not just the selfish smug brigade that some posters have identified..

Those that go on about deaths from loss of livelihood, domestic violence, etc due to lockdown.

I've found that everyone I know who takes this view is suddenly interested in groups they've never before taken an interest in because it allows them to think they aren't just being selfish.

In reality all the people I know using this line haven't done anything for people suffering domestic abuse before and are now all of a sudden their biggest champions.

They aren't losing their livelihoods and have never expressed particular interest in other social injustices before but now it's their favourite topic to talk about.

They don't even seem to see the hypocrisy of labelling me a 'sheeple' for following the rules while wailing about the injustices of lockdown when it's me and my husband that have both lost our jobs and are facing bankruptcy while they are untouched.

What's really happening is that they don't like the impact the rules are having on their own lives and have simply latched on to a way they think they can argue against them while not looking selfish.

But...we see you.

If you weren't bothered about this causes before and now suddenly are when conveniently they align to you not being able to do what you want, don't expect the rest of us to be so stupid that we don't see through it 🤷🏻‍♀️

I think alot of people are scared they will lose homes job, businesses during all of this happening not mentioned peoples mental health have taken a hit. There's a bigger picture here and its clear the local lockdowns and mask wearing and covid procedures arent working its affecting everyone in different ways.

Yes and im equally surprised by people i know and myself.
I know people who are hyper concerned and equally those that are the polar opposite.
Peoples views are interesting too.
It makes it difficult to talk to people because i dont get them anymore.

Im certainly missing loved ones

It is obviously worse online. Either people drop their mask and feel it’s safe to reveal their true colours on the internet, or “normal” people are not glued to their keyboards all day and night but getting on with their lives.

I agree that the level of intelligence can sometimes be astonishing. There was a poster recently who declared that 10% of people in the UK had died of coronavirus. Yep, 10%. Then there are the liars, who swear that 10 teachers have died at their school, their elderly parents caught covid off the post and their cat definitely tested positive in March...

What I'm glad about on the other hand is that all the people I know who I'm close to have a fairly balanced view.

Yes, I've cut two or three people out that I only see via social media these days but the people I actually interact with day to day fall into the largest category (thank god) of balancing their needs with the needs of others and trying to be kind.

An unfortunate impact is that social media (and the media generally) magnifies the voices of the extremes...whereas most people are decent.

Presumably because in real life you have a tendency to filter out all the batshit ones such that they don't make it into your 'circle' so to speak.

for those that have uncovered someone they're close to being an arsehole though. I guess better to know now when it doesn't impact you directly than to find out when they steal your husband or whatever fuckery they could have done...

When I was worried about having zero income as self employed, a friend turned on me and said I wasn't a proper keyworker, it wasn't like I was putting my life at risk doing an important job.