To think this pandemic has provided deep insight into people's character?

[rosesbloom]

I have found it quite illuminating seeing people's reactions. Friends and family members I have known for years have surprised me. It is like this situation has acted like a catalyst to reveal people's true nature, values and character.

A friend I had known for years and thought was a kind and empathetic person said the vulnerable just need to accept that they will die if they catch it and everything needs to carry on as normal. I have an underlying health condition she doesn't know about. I just sat there in stunned silence.

It has even shown me things about myself I didn't realise. It has shown me how anxious I am about my health, usually all those worries are internal and I keep them to myself but they have had to be brought out into the light when I explain to friends/family why I don't feel comfortable going for a meal in a restaurant at the moment despite it being "allowed" and "COVID-19 secure". Even though I know I engage in risky behaviours all the time like driving a car, crossing a road, etc it is like I have a blind spot with accurately assessing COVID risks.

Have any of you had any surprising revelations from people?

YANBU as such but it's a bit like Brexit/religion/benefits...... generally we experience the world and form opinions based on our own life experiences so it can be rather harsh to make sweeping statements like: I've seen a different side to people and then judge THEM from a moralistic view. It's often not a barometer of their moral compass.

Don't get me wrong, some people really are a wolf in sheep's clothing but the majority really aren't.

You also cannot judge others on how they react to a fearful situation such as Covid because it's NOT a true reflection of who they are, it's a reflection their irrational self and we all say and do idiotic things when faced with something frightening and out of our control.

Take a chill pill and let the dust settle. Better yet, educate your friend on your invisible illness.... it might change her mindset.

@SharpLily I feel I know this couple

Oh yes!
Discovered one 'friend' lying about having Covid for sympathy then discovered she had also lied about having cancer 😡
Needless to say we are no longer friends........

It’s just a shame it seems to have divided everyone when it started off well, with lots of public spirit.

People are incapable of having a balanced opinion and can't critically think. There is utter stupidity on either side of the COVID argument. People take things at face value without asking questions.

Also that I really don't think like my family do and they are unfortunately are one of the above. Still love em though, the fools

I can’t believe how anxious some of my family are over covid . For the first few months of lockdown my brother in law and his wife didn’t leave the house even for exercise . He is now having panic attacks thinking that his atrial fibrillation is going to kill him . He has thumping in his ears at night , is not sleeping and if constantly checking his pulse .
It’s not only him , others have similar.

It astounds me. This is in a way like the war. The virus will and could kill the vulnerable in the same way say Hitler came after the Jews. Should I shrug my shoulders and do nothing because I'm not Jewish or do I look after everyone around me. People are moaning twats...

It hasn't changed their character, it's just shown what they are really like.

I can count on one hand all the people I actually like (and have a finger or two left over), the rest could jump off a cliff as far as I'm concerned and I'd lose no sleep.

The real problem with this virus and how people have handled it is the way it is spread. You are no longer able to hug people to reassure or to comfort, you can no longer visit them and spend time with them - you need to keep a distance from everyone - and this makes everyone feel at arms length. Human touch has become out of bounds. So no wonder we all feel 'distant' 'polarised' and out of touch with those we are close to, we are all those things. If the virus worked differently and we could still hold each other, I am sure things would be so much better than they are.

The war was easier in that way. You could sing, hug and gather together - that is very bonding - the opposite is true of covid.

PhilCornwall1

And they all speak so highly of you..,

This whole Virus situation is having a big affect on us individually and as a society. I think the effects are going to reverberate for decades to come. On a personal level it’s made me go back to basics, appreciating the simple things and caring more about close friends, family and colleagues.

Trying to stay positive and look after yourself the best you can. I’ve started avoiding the press now as it just makes me feel anxious. The prospect of now having to work from home over winter is not good.

On a side note. How eloquent is prof Chris Witty? I could listen to his voice all night ! I think I may be developing an unusual guilty crush

I feel the same about Chris Whitty, I could listen to his studious, calm voice all day - the voice of reason in the chaos of the world.

@BillywilliamV

PhilCornwall1

And they all speak so highly of you..,

Like I care.

I try to ignore the w***s and look at the good it has brought out in people, the ones who love and appreciate you and respect the rules with regards to masks and distancing .

People who think my parents in their 70s and healthier than me and hoping to make it into their 90s are at the end of their lives anyway and I should accept that they will die of Covid-19.
Sorry for those people who are in financial dire straits, but talking about other people's relatives like that is shocking

No disrespect to you, poster, but I do think this is part of the problem - the automatic assumption that anyone over a certain age who gets covid will die, so exposing them to any level of risk is seen as heartless butchery of the highest order. It's not. And there is no automatic death sentence.

I thinks it's just demonstrated what we already know, human nature is astonishingly selfish.

People on both sides have been very selfish with very few prepared to even try and understand the others.

Some people want the world shut down to protect their health and others want things to carry on to protect their livelihood. You can understand both those pov but many seem unprepared to consider that both sides have a point.

So, OP thinks people who accept life carries some risks are wicked and people who need to earn a living think she is selfish in wanting to condemn them to a life of poverty. Both sides unswervingly think they are right.

Some people want the world shut down to protect their health and others want things to carry on to protect their livelihood.

The issue really is that’s there’s little common ground across those positions. Either our society is open for business or it isn’t. We’ve been trying to find a balance between opening up and closing down that’s broadly acceptable and it’s fiendishly difficult.

@TheSockMonster

I have been surprised how polarised many people have become. I would not have expected such extremes opinion, or for those opinions to be so strongly held. It’s like the grey areas have all been pulled from the middle. I do wonder if this is a side effect of the Brexit debate.

The people I know tend to fall into one of the following:

1. The global conspiracy theorists
2. The “JUST STAY AT HOME!” camp
3. The “everyone back to normal, it’s just flu” camp
4. The balanced camp, usually along the following lines, but flexible and happy to consider other opinions; “yes, the new state powers are worrying, possibly necessary, possibly not, but unlikely to be a sure sign of a global conspiracy; yes, we should take action as a country and individuals to limit the spread, but remaining in full lockdown is probably best avoided so long as the NHS is coping; yes, Covid is just one of many circulating illnesses we live with, but it does seem to carry a risk worthy of active management”

Fortunately most of my friends fall into #4, but many have surprised me by falling into 1, 2 or 3.

This precisely sums up my experience of the pandemic. Particularly your last line.

I see similarities to the mindset of those people who willingly offered up their Jewish neighbours to the nazis in ww2.

seabreeze - I so agree. Now I understand how Nazi Germany happened, in a way that I didn't before.

@Ken1976

I can’t believe how anxious some of my family are over covid . For the first few months of lockdown my brother in law and his wife didn’t leave the house even for exercise . He is now having panic attacks thinking that his atrial fibrillation is going to kill him . He has thumping in his ears at night , is not sleeping and if constantly checking his pulse . It’s not only him , others have similar.

You sound very dismissive .Atrial fibrillation does kill some people though as well as causing stroke or heart failure.

The issue really is that’s there’s little common ground across those positions. Either our society is open for business or it isn’t. We’ve been trying to find a balance between opening up and closing down that’s broadly acceptable and it’s fiendishly difficult.

This is exactly it I think. No matter what path we take it's going to end up totally destroying some people's lives, and it's (mostly) different people in each scenario. It's natural that everyone's first priority is to ensure that they're not one of the ones getting completely fucked, before they can afford to have compassion for people in other situations.

Maybe not everyone - some people are genuinely selfless and some people don't give a shit about anyone besides themselves - but the vast majority, anyway.

@psychomath

The issue really is that’s there’s little common ground across those positions. Either our society is open for business or it isn’t. We’ve been trying to find a balance between opening up and closing down that’s broadly acceptable and it’s fiendishly difficult.

This is exactly it I think. No matter what path we take it's going to end up totally destroying some people's lives, and it's (mostly) different people in each scenario. It's natural that everyone's first priority is to ensure that they're not one of the ones getting completely fucked, before they can afford to have compassion for people in other situations.

This is true but I think being in the close everything down to protect health camp is a very privileged position and it wouldn't hurt to recognise that. People who have concerns for their health and their livelihood will prioritise their livelihood.

I work in a supermarket and I haven't been massively surprised by people's general behaviour due to the pandemic, it really is human nature and fear as a previous person posting mentioned. I've seen the very worst of behaviour and the very best... but it's across the ages and generations. I've seen young ones with very little regard for older customers and pushing in front of them or getting deliberately too close to them, and I've been shoved by some older customers after they can't find what they want while 'browsing' or what we call 'the chorus of tuts' when older customers object to small children 'making a noise'. And don't get me started on the binge buying just before lockdown, that really was across the board and utterly despicable behaviour from all sides. I was grateful someone once gave me some posh loo roll as a joke present - I found it in the attic as we ran out! And none from work or the corner shop - beyond a joke when you're knackered after a shift, can't buy any and come home to a panicking teenager who thinks he won't be able to wipe his bum! lol. It's been a very very stressful time for us all hasn't it, some of my colleagues have been off with stress, I'm lucky in that I have an inner calm which prevents me from getting too wound up by it all, and although I suffer from asthma I've made sure I've kept it under control and myself as healthy as possible so I'm stronger for others not so fortunate, especially covering shifts for colleagues I love and respect who are shielding or off with anxiety. My Mummy instinct is stronger than ever, and protecting people comes first for me, and I reckon there will be a lot of mums on here who feel the same, it's the only way to counteract bad behaviour and show it up for what it is..and we CAN counteract fear, or at least show our kids how to face it, setting them up to be strong in the future, and not behave like a bunch of twonks if there's a huge crisis. On a sad note I really feel for those of you who have had it affect relationships. It's never nice finding someone is not who you thought they were. I'm lucky in that all my family, friends and next door neighbours have been amazingly supportive, and they know I'm there to help if needed, and some have needed it and it felt good to help them. Some of my colleagues have been incredible - setting up home deliveries for local old folk we know who don't have a computer, and delivering food outside of their work hours. Alas recently since the easing of lockdown selfish behaviour and rudeness from customers has definitely gone up, and Bath where I live, is crazily busy, and the tourists are back - I don't feel safe walking to work through the town centre but I have to do it, so just mask up and try and use back routes, and try my best to keep all our customers safe, good and bad. On reflection I think we, as Mums, just need to try and counter all this selfishness in society by instilling kindness, thoughtfulness and empathy into our kids and hope they don't behave badly as they get older, and respect others. It's all we can do. Marcus Rashford's Mum did a good job didn't she. So can we.