To think this pandemic has provided deep insight into people's character?

[rosesbloom]

I have found it quite illuminating seeing people's reactions. Friends and family members I have known for years have surprised me. It is like this situation has acted like a catalyst to reveal people's true nature, values and character.

A friend I had known for years and thought was a kind and empathetic person said the vulnerable just need to accept that they will die if they catch it and everything needs to carry on as normal. I have an underlying health condition she doesn't know about. I just sat there in stunned silence.

It has even shown me things about myself I didn't realise. It has shown me how anxious I am about my health, usually all those worries are internal and I keep them to myself but they have had to be brought out into the light when I explain to friends/family why I don't feel comfortable going for a meal in a restaurant at the moment despite it being "allowed" and "COVID-19 secure". Even though I know I engage in risky behaviours all the time like driving a car, crossing a road, etc it is like I have a blind spot with accurately assessing COVID risks.

Have any of you had any surprising revelations from people?

The snitches and curtain twitchers are my most loathed. Those taking to social media to complain about someone who stood a little too close to them and that there were too many people on the beach (despite being socially distanced).
There were people complaining that there were too many people at the shops despite being at the shops themselves, but they they had something important to do.
I think people have completely lost their heads.

I'm shocked at the number of people who are crippled by anxiety and fear to the point where they are incapable of rational thought.

My 23yo dd found it really hard to cope with people she thought of as her friends basically saying in group discussions that Covid deaths don't matter because they only affect people with underlying health conditions. Like- "we don't really care if you die". At 23 that is not an easy thing to hear

Having said that, she has also found a lot of kindness and cheerful pragmatism, sometimes in quarters where she didn't expect it.

I was impressed by my 20yo son's calm acceptance of lockdown, particularly as he was in quite a difficult phase of life anyway.

I think those on both sides are surprised by the reactions of others. All we can all try to do is come together (but not literally of course...) and be kind to others as you never know what they are each going through.

I've learnt that some people I know are very selfish. I don't agree with the rules but have followed them to the letter, even when that's made things difficult for me.
I try not to ask what people did at the weekend anymore because some of the answers infuriate me.

Also, there is some kind of middle ground between "I am crippled by anxiety and incapable of rational thought" and "I already have 3 colleagues who have been ill for many months with LongCovid and I worry that this might become a more widespread problem".

Talking of disabled I am also horrified at the fact that we seem as a society to just dimiss the rights of disabled people. I am talking about the requirement to wear masks and the right for certain people to be exempt. Yes most places are not even considering that and make it an ordeal for those people, having to prove their exemption etc. Equality seems to have taken a massive step backwards and yet we are not hearing much about this. It just seems to be accepted in this fools errand of making sure everyone is "safe".

Agree with this.

And you think it’s kind to cause deaths through Loss of livelihood, domestic violence, cancer deaths due to non screening, child abuse? Yes, you are so kind and empathetic, OP!

Actually, I don’t think there’s been anything terribly illuminating. Humans have acted like humans. When the situation gets difficult, people put their own needs first.

Society functions smoothly only so long as needs are balanced and facilitated to some degree. Once that starts to crumble, we’re in trouble and that balancing act has become very difficult - now feels like a pivotal moment for that.

There’s nothing surprising or concerning about the behaviour I’ve seen. We would probably not have survived as a species without the instinct to fight for our own needs.

One thing that annoys me is the assumption that people who need rules to be observed to keep them physically safe are selfishly ignoring the needs of the (supposedly totally separate) people who suffer from MH issues during social distancing/lockdown.

Yeah, like having a physical disability or underlying chronic condition means you're not also going to be suffering from MH issues

And you think it’s kind to cause deaths through Loss of livelihood, domestic violence, cancer deaths due to non screening, child abuse? Yes, you are so kind and empathetic, OP!

The difficulty is that those things will equally be caused by the spread of Covid.

My 3 colleagues haven't been able to work since March. They may never work again. That is also loss of livelihood.

If more doctors and nurses become ill or long term disabled, that is not going to speed up cancer treatment.

Is there any evidence that a violent or abusive family member will be less violent or abusive if they are dealing with a family where somebody is incapacitated due to Covid or LongCovid?

@Userzzz. But the covid obsessed ignore these deaths and hardship as it’s not covid. Making out that people who are suffering as a result of lockdown are the selfish ones. It’s astonishing what they’re expecting others to do to protect them and then have the cheek to moan about it.

Covid, BLM and Brexit have made me realise how bloody horrid mosr people are. A family member who I thought was kind and progressive has is not following any rules as "the blacks and the Asians aren't and that is causing the increase in cases in their area."

@Friendsoftheearth

I have been really shocked, really shocked by some of my friends;

Friends that travelled around Europe going to parties, gloating about holidays. Then expected everyone to be comfortable with meeting up with her and her dc when they arrived home.

Family that have been completely indifferent about looking after their elderly relatives, and leaving them without food and help. On furlough and lived very close by, but just busy doing the garden and watching netflix to care about their own parents.

Delivered shopping to a friend for months thinking it was for an elderly neighbour and elderly family members, and a few things added on for them, and it turned out it was all for her and she was lying to me!

General selfish and self absorbed behaviour - my life comes first, the health of others comes second (or not at all)

I would go as far as to say after the insight we have had from covid with some people - it has been so bad that my respect for them has completely died, and I would rather we weren't friends anymore. I am distancing now - as I can't see them the same way anymore.

Maybe she has underlying health conditions she didnt want to share.

The thing that has annoyed me most (other than the curtain twitchers in the early part of lockdown) is those who say everyone is "selfish" when they don't agree with them. I suppose they are right - we are all selfish regardless of our viewpoint, but it gets a bit tedious as an argument.

I get fed up with the virtue signalling and worrying about the "vulnerable" - no, you're just worried about yourself and yours.

Yes the people with big gardens one really shocked me with their judgemental attitudes for other people wanting to breathe fresh air too

The Times had a fantastic cartoon on this, I will see if I can find it again.

@SomewhereEast

Its been an education in the power of fear, basically. People will agree to literally anything in order to feel 'safe'.

Yes and it's scary.

No never I wish she did have such a thing, as it would make it easier to overlook, - she simply didn't want to 'risk' the supermarket, even though she is healthy and fit. And it was convenient for her I think. Having your shopping delivered every week.
She then went onto have a very full social life over the summer with no issues whatsoever.

People who think my parents in their 70s and healthier than me and hoping to make it into their 90s are at the end of their lives anyway and I should accept that they will die of Covid-19.
Sorry for those people who are in financial dire straits, but talking about other people's relatives like that is shocking.

Yes most places are not even considering that and make it an ordeal for those people, having to prove their exemption etc.

Surely most disabled people are already used to having to prove their need to be exempt in all sorts of situations? Parking, skipping a queue, using the disabled loo. Why is it suddenly such an ordeal in this particular situation?

Yes there’s quite a few sociopaths about. I’m not talking about people scared for their livelihoods etc but quite a few who just would happily lock a % of population away or see them die just so they’re not inconvenienced or need to wear a mask 🙄.

Quite understand now how the historic atrocities happened!

@TheSockMonster

I have been surprised how polarised many people have become. I would not have expected such extremes opinion, or for those opinions to be so strongly held. It’s like the grey areas have all been pulled from the middle. I do wonder if this is a side effect of the Brexit debate.

The people I know tend to fall into one of the following:

1. The global conspiracy theorists
2. The “JUST STAY AT HOME!” camp
3. The “everyone back to normal, it’s just flu” camp
4. The balanced camp, usually along the following lines, but flexible and happy to consider other opinions; “yes, the new state powers are worrying, possibly necessary, possibly not, but unlikely to be a sure sign of a global conspiracy; yes, we should take action as a country and individuals to limit the spread, but remaining in full lockdown is probably best avoided so long as the NHS is coping; yes, Covid is just one of many circulating illnesses we live with, but it does seem to carry a risk worthy of active management”

Fortunately most of my friends fall into #4, but many have surprised me by falling into 1, 2 or 3.

I'm not sure whats shocking or surprising about being in Camp 2. while i've not walled myself into my home, i'm certainly very circumspect about where i go when i do have to go out.

I also think people should stay the fuck home rather than go out drinking in nightclubs and bars

I also think people should stay the fuck home rather than go out drinking in nightclubs and bars

And those who work in nightclubs and bars? What should they be doing?

Things appear to be polarised between those who want everyone to be under house arrest and the anti vaxxer, anti maskers, or those who want to run around London rioting. Some common sense is needed. Unless you have a serious health condition or are very aged, is it absolutely necessary for everyone else to remain confined within their homes if they are taking reasonable care? Similarly, is it essential to go out on a demo in the middle of a pandemic?

Calabasa
You have illustrated sockmonkey's point perfectly.