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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ignoring calls from nursery

129 replies

Fredup12 · 20/09/2020 21:52

My little boy has a cold (definitely a cold, not covid). I think he might be too poorly to go to nursery tomorrow because he’s still a bit chesty and has a runny nose. Both DH and I should be working from home tomorrow. DH says give calpol in the morning and then ignore any calls from nursery so we can get on with our work. He says if I answer nursery’s call and they say to collect him, then I have to look after him all day because he will be busy with work (even though I have work to do too). I don’t think its ok to take him in, and if we did we can’t ignore nursery’s calls. And I think we need to share the childcare between us. AIBU?

OP posts:
blindmansbluff · 20/09/2020 21:53

What a fucking dick he is.

RuggerHug · 20/09/2020 21:55

I'd laugh in his face. No. You both need to work, you both need to pitch in/tag team.

HauntedPencil · 20/09/2020 21:55

Of course it's unacceptable to ignore their calls, it's really awful of him tbh.

NoSquirrels · 20/09/2020 21:56

Your child’s father is an absolute grade A arsehole.

RuggerHug · 20/09/2020 21:56

Actually, tell him if you did that they'd contact whoever the emergency contact is, and you'll lose the place in the nursery when they realise they were ignored. So he sucks it up tomorrow or accepts sucking it up every day.

D4rwin · 20/09/2020 21:57

Wow. What a caring man he is. Is he always this neglectful?

AGoatAteIt · 20/09/2020 21:57

Your husband is a cunt.

sharpeidiem · 20/09/2020 21:57

Please don't ignore the nursery's calls! Keep him home with you if you're worried, but sick little kids shouldn't be out and about right now (whether it's Covid or not) :( x

Scarlettpixie · 20/09/2020 21:57

Your husband is a dick. Of course you shouldn't ignore calls from nursery and if your child needs to be at home, you should share the childcare if you both need to get some work done.

BumpkinSpiceBatty · 20/09/2020 21:58

If you know their calls they will then call who you have registered as an emergency contact and if that fails it will be social services next.
DH is a wanker

MissEliza · 20/09/2020 21:59

You need to do what's right for your little one. I couldn't be with a man who cared so little for his own child's welfare.

DontBeShelfish · 20/09/2020 22:01

Do you rely on him to collect your child if they're ill on other occasions? How often in the past might your DH have ignored calls from the nursery? Honestly, I think this would be a deal-breaker for me. Certainly I wouldn't be able to look at him in the same light again.

Incrediblytired · 20/09/2020 22:01

Well you know he’s being a dickhead. You can’t ignore nursery, I presume they took loads of contacts and will be ringing your work and other contacts to get hold of you.

If it’s just a runny nose, they are allowed in.

If child has had temp and runny nose AND cleared of covid via a test it’s fine too.

You could plan to start nursery an hour later to see how they are, then if a bit better then calpol and in is fine.

Zoecarter · 20/09/2020 22:01

Wow that is awful I can’t believe a parent would do that. From some one who is working from home who’s child is off nursery for 14 days and we have to isolate because his key worker has covid

Glenthebattleostrich · 20/09/2020 22:01

He's an arsehole. If you're little one is poorly enough to need Calpol through the day he needs to be at home.

As a childminder I've given notice for continuing to send a child in ill.

Tattoocrazymum · 20/09/2020 22:02

What a twat.
If your little one is feeling too unwell to go, then he shouldn't be going, and definitely dont ignore the calls if you do take him nursery.

Dillo10 · 20/09/2020 22:03

Wow this would truly disgust me

Firstly it's disrespectful to the nursery staff

But mainly it's a vile attitude towards your child

I'm shocked honestly

likeafishneedsabike · 20/09/2020 22:03

He might be all talk. DH used to talk the talk about this kind of thing, but when faced with an obviously ill child he would change his tune.

Newmumatlast · 20/09/2020 22:03

id be having serious words with my husband about this

Original poster
Fredup12 · 20/09/2020 22:04

Thank you everyone. I really appreciate your comments. I think I knew I wasn’t be unreasonable but I just seem to have lost all confidence in my own opinions.

OP posts:
Reddog1 · 20/09/2020 22:04

I’m hoping for your sake that this is an aberration, that he’s not this awful generally. All the best, OP.

MomToTwoBabas · 20/09/2020 22:04

Wow. Guessing him and the child are not close seeing as he has no concern for him. Did he not want him?

WorraLiberty · 20/09/2020 22:05

What an absolutely awful 'father', to see his sick child as an inconvenience Angry

Rudolphian · 20/09/2020 22:06

Yeah it's a disgusting thing to do.
What if there is actually an emergency they are ringing you about and need to let you know.

Soubriquet · 20/09/2020 22:06

Oh look at that

A man thinking he’s so much more important that anyone else