To not want a house full in the run up to the wedding?

[IwishThatYouWereHere]

We get married in a couple of weeks. We live in a 3 bed with 2 children. DP's parent's live away so are going to stay with us before and after the wedding. DP's brother and his girlfriend also live away and we said they could stay on the sofa (we don't have any spare rooms) the night before the wedding as I'd be at my parents and the night of the wedding as we would be at the hotel. They then asked if they could stay a couple of days before the wedding and the night after. I said no as it'll mean we are breaking the 'rule of 6' should it be in place still and also I don't want my house full in the lead up to the wedding as I'll be stressed as it is and just want to relax. AIBU?

This rule will probably last until just before Christmas if not after it. Tell them your not getting done for them to save some money. Also tell your fiance to stop being stupid as if his not going to talk to you for abiding the law maybe he should tell all the guests not to come as there will not be a wedding. He might realise his being childish then.

Why are you marrying a man who can’t even have your back in a reasonably simple situation like this? And not only that, he’s being actively hostile. Disappointed might be tolerable but this behaviour is not on.

Dear goodness don’t marry this man

OP, this is really hard to read. You’re a few days before the wedding, only a few months into grieving and your ‘D’P is sulking and refusing to speak to you because he’d rather please his brother than the woman he’s supposed to love? I’d call off the wedding, it’ll still be less fuss than the inevitable divorce. He’s acting like this at a time when he’s supposed to cherish you the most!

Personally, I think it is shocking that any of his family have invited themselves to your house so close to and after the wedding. But there is also the old Mumsnet adage, you don't have an inlaws issue, you have a DP/future DH problem. I would cancel the wedding personally and reappraise the relationship, given his overall attitude. But then my tolerance for bullshit is very, very low!

Postpone the wedding and have a rethink if you want to be lumbered with this for the rest of your life OP, if you felt so inclined maybe try some couples counselling to help communication (help your "D"P realise that he is a twat) between you and also have some time to think about work and what you would do if single and co-parenting with him.

First off, I'm so very sorry for the loss of your sister.

Now.. I have to ask... what kind of a childish twat is this man you're marrying? He screenshot' messages and sent them to you?? And the. told you not to talk to him?? Is he a teenage girl? I would most definitely consider postponing the wedding. This year has been difficult for you and he's more concerned about appeasing other people rather than making sure you're happy.

They view you as a skivvy with the temerity to complain when they want to rock up to your house and use it to suit themselves, just as they did at your dd's christening. They have no respect for you at all, and the way they are treating you is considered acceptable by your supposed "dear" partner. The way your partner treats you is taking my breath away, truly.

You are not being remotely unreasonable and you deserve far, FAR better than this. Please don't marry him, for the sake of you and your children, you can have a better life than this. I'm so sorry about your sister

Concerned that the MIL is the go between about accommodation arrangements at your house, it does not bode well for the family dynamic. Is she controlling/ manipulative generally? The brothers are grown men and should be communicating directly.

And I'd agree with others that you have a DP problem. He should have your back in this situation.