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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Unfair treatment of my daughter by class teacher

581 replies

Mummy20192 · 08/09/2020 00:29

Need some opinion please... my 9 yr old dd was very excited since summer holidays to return to school and to be able to run for the class eco monitor.. she did research on oceans, pollution over the lockdown all ready for election of the year. Anyways she won the ecomonitor role in class by democratic vote of her peers. She was super proud and excited.

Today she goes into school, and her teacher tells her that a senior member of staff has said that she has to share her role with the eco monitor of PST year as that child is very passionate about the environment.

My port dd is sad and embarrassed as she thinks her teachers think that she’s not good enough to be eco monitor even though her classmates voted for her.

I explained to her that’s it’s ok to share the role, but now I’m thinking that it’s completely unfair on the part of the teachers to put my child in this situation when no other children in the school is having to jobshare apart from my dd. Am i overreacting?

OP posts:
Cheeeeislifenow · 09/09/2020 07:07

Oh and apologise for the confusion and explain that she should have made it clear and she should have been more tactful announcing it.

monkeytennis97 · 09/09/2020 07:10

@ElizabethMainwaring

I also doubt that SLT were involved. That's a little white lie to pass the buck. Like I said in a pp, there is a reason why the other child is involved. Honestly op, just forget about it. The teacher is doing his / her best to keep 30+ kids happy in very difficult circumstances.
This.
monkeytennis97 · 09/09/2020 07:12

@differentnameforthis 'Teachers can do no wrong on MN'
😂😂😂😂😂 You are joking aren't you?!

Pobblebonk · 09/09/2020 08:11

[quote RedHelenB]@Pobblebonk because maybe they didn't want to do the jobs again?

Both children obviously wanted the role, they've both got it and it really isnt something to get so het up about, it really isnt.[/quote]
Or maybe they or their parents weren't as vocal about it? Presumably they did want the jobs or they wouldn't have stood for election.

You seem to forget that it's not a case of only two children wanting the role. Other children went up for it. How is it fair to them to have another child parachuted in? Perhaps they wanted it just as badly?

Pobblebonk · 09/09/2020 08:14

@flyingant

Those who are saying that the teacher has handled the situation badly, what do you think the teacher should have done...if they had the class election and were then told that the previous monitor had to stay in-role...what else could the teacher have done to be fair? I'm not talking about going in back in time and not having the election in the first place, or saying from the start that it was a shared role (it seems the teacher didn't know this)...but now they've had the election but have then been told afterwards that the previous monitor needs to stay in the role. What else could the teacher have done, other than let both girls share the role?
If that is what has happened, then whoever made the decision that only one role should be shared without telling the teacher affected is in the wrong. Perhaps that person can explain it to OP's DD.
canigooutyet · 09/09/2020 08:51

It doesn't sound like the girl who was given this and other roles didn't even bother doing the election process for this year.

What happens next year if the class spend a lot of time in isolation? Three of them job share regardless of if they all bother to go through the election process?

Not like the other girl hasn't got a role, she's also doing library duty.

canigooutyet · 09/09/2020 08:53

Plus the other girl had the role from September to March.
If it was really about last year then the fair way would be to give her a term, not the whole year.

ItsAlwaysSunnyOnMN · 09/09/2020 08:58

When I read threads like this I really pity teachers having to deal with such nonsense

Op really stop being ridiculous and feeling into your dd’s drama

Butchyrestingface · 09/09/2020 08:59

@Mummy20192

Today she goes into school, and her teacher tells her that a senior member of staff has said that she has to share her role with the eco monitor of PST year as that child is very passionate about the environment.

Did the teacher not post about this just last week? The one who rigged the vote to disfavour the popular child and put the wee shy, wouldn't-say-boo-to-a-goose kiddo in the hot seat? Grin

jay55 · 09/09/2020 09:04

I feel bad for the kid who was second in the voting and not considered for a job share.

LadyLairdArgyll · 09/09/2020 09:17

I feel bad for the kid who was second in the voting and not considered for a job share.

very true and valid point 🌺

Mittens030869 · 09/09/2020 09:25

I feel bad for the kid who was second in the voting and not considered for a job share.

I feel the same. They put the work into preparing a presentation, after all.

ItsAlwaysSunnyOnMN · 09/09/2020 09:32

Yes I wondered if it was a sort of thread about a thread Butchyrestingface

Tempusfudgeit · 09/09/2020 10:14

Reminiscent of Sir Samuel Blackboard Monitor Vimes. 'Eco Monitor' sounds creepy AF. Going around with a clipboard asking which pupils' parents drive hybrids? Shudder.

canigooutyet · 09/09/2020 10:28

@Tempusfudgeit

Reminiscent of Sir Samuel Blackboard Monitor Vimes. 'Eco Monitor' sounds creepy AF. Going around with a clipboard asking which pupils' parents drive hybrids? Shudder.
Oh it's that, wondered what eco-monitor did. Only ones I have seen have been devices on a wall lol.

THey started doing those when my youngest was in year 6 and unfortunately he has my attitude. After a few weeks of the same questions he started having fun with the how do you get to school, hot air balloon, teleportation, water slide, catapult and more.

What could you do to reduce something about food - become a farmer, but I'd have to convince mum to uproot us all

doublehalo · 09/09/2020 10:30

Yes, what does and Eco monitor do exactly?

Jourdain11 · 09/09/2020 10:53

OP, I completely understand why you and your DD are upset. I'm sure the teacher had good intentions, but they have handled the situation very poorly and created difficulties where there needn't have been any. I'd imagine the other girl's mother asked and may have had a good reason for doing so, but to your DD this devalues her achievement. It's also very unfair on the other kids who ran and may well cause resentment against the girl who has been parachuted in. A more experienced or imaginative teacher would have simply found some other little environmentally-related task or job for her to do, while leaving the monitor position to stand as it was.

I think there is little you can do to change things - but I do think it's completely okay for you to sympathise with DD's disappointment and to say "sometimes teachers get it wrong." Focus on the positives too - her classmates elected her, she was the one they chose, and that is actually the most important thing at the end of the day.

For those who are worried about the poor put-upon teachers: yes, they have it very tough at the moment. But if you're not interested or concerned by children's feelings, then quite honestly, you shouldn't become a teacher!

jessstan2 · 09/09/2020 13:06

@doublehalo

Yes, what does and Eco monitor do exactly?
They snoop in lunch boxes and pick up litter to be put in the correct bins.
flyingant · 09/09/2020 16:42

Cheeeeislifenow you didn't understand my message. I'm taking about the fact that it seems the teacher didn't know that the role would have to be shared. OP's messages suggests that a senior manager told the teacher afterward the class election that the previous monitor has to stay in role. In which case, what else could the teacher have done?

As I said..
...what else could the teacher have done to be fair? I'm not talking about going in back in time and not having the election in the first place, or saying from the start that it was a shared role (it seems the teacher didn't know this)...but now they've had the election but have then been told afterwards that the previous monitor needs to stay in the role. What else could the teacher have done, other than let both girls share the role?

@flyingant very simply, explain to ops dd before the vote. This will be a shared position as x did not complete her time due to lockdown. That's it! But it seems like the teacher didn't know this before the vote.

Cheeeeislifenow · 09/09/2020 17:39

It's really easy teacher says "sorry x, I should have explained the vote, it's a shared role this year as y didnt get to fulfill her full term. I should have mentioned this beforehand, you must have been upset when I announced it, just to clarify I really love your ideas and you and y will make a great team.

That's it! An apology will easily make it right, there is no way to go back in time and change it but hindsight will give the teacher an opportunity to apologise for how it was handled.

murakamilove · 09/09/2020 17:42

I’m so sorry OP - I don’t really think we care?!?!

SHONNYSMUMMY · 09/09/2020 17:50

@Mummy20192 I think what you need to consider is that the past years child didn't actually get to be the eco monitor for the duration so probably feels that they missed out on sharing their knowledge at this time I think you should try to give this insight to your child and that it is not because they aren't smart enough but so that now they can both share each others knowledge and also help a friend out who missed out on getting to do her job well. Team work starts now.

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 09/09/2020 17:52

@murakamilove

I’m so sorry OP - I don’t really think we care?!?!
Who is we?
FredtheCatsMum · 09/09/2020 17:56

As a climate activist, I'd suggest that you're not being unreasonable, and this is a very teachable moment for your child. Her hard work and passion for the role have been undermined by a figure of authority. Even her election win has been taken away. But its figures of authority who have caused the ecological problems we have now. And they are often well meaning -governments don't do enough to deal with climate change because they concentrate on other priorities and don't take it seriously enough.

But working to save the planet isn't something that you need someone's permission to do. She should work with the other child, of course, but also consider what she can do outside the role. Perhaps she could lead like-minded youngsters to improve a local park, or encourage fellow students to persuade their parents to let them walk or cycle (depends where you are) to school?

Tell her about Greta Thunberg, who is only a couple of years older, and encourage her as much as you can.

graysquirrel · 09/09/2020 17:58

Totally YABU. You also dont know what is going on in the other child's life.
My one DD is very passionate about issues but cripplingly shy so has occasionally been moved into a position to try to boost her confidence. Schools have plenty of roles where the popular chatty children thrive while the shy introverts never get a look in.

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