To be utterly disgusted by "DDLG"?

[BumbleBeeeeeee]

On a Facebook mum group, someone started a thread about kinks. No problem with kinky things whatsoever, do whatever you want in your own home. But someone mentioned the acronym DDLG which was explained to mean "daddy dom/little girl". Ie female/"sub" pretending to be a child in the bedroom. Talk of sticker books and colouring in and pretending to be a certain age, more often than not toddler/preschool age.
That mothers can do this and happily have kids with men who want to fuck them while they're pretending to be children is absolutely vile and shocking.
It cant just be me?!

@TinaBennington

Listen people. Some people get a sexual thrill out of dressing up in a Nazi uniform. Pretty sure they don't secretly harbour fantasies of mass genocide. Get a f*ing grip.

I'm Jewish. I have every right to be grossed out by Nazi fetish. And yes, I know there are Jews into Nazi fetish, same as there are black people who are into race play and love being called the n-word and treated like a slave. It's the taboo thing. But when I see those uniforms all I can think of is what the Nazis did to people like me.

So you like pretending to be a little girl who fucks her dad. Great, whatever floats your boat. It's still a huge squick for me.

I don't understand why some people on this thread keep saying 'lots of people do this!' Or 'women do this too!' as if it's a great piece of evidence to prove these kind of sexual practices are ok.

As other people have repeatedly said. We KNOW lots of people do this. We KNOW some women are into it. We KNOW that because of the internet and consumer culture pushing anything that sells (costumes, films, books etc) that it looks like normal, light hearted fun. But just because lots of people do it really does not make it ok.

It's not ok and it's also not a type of therapeutic practice. If you have a trauma or a lot of stress in your life of course you need some kind of relief. Alcohol, drugs, taboo sex. All these things will definitely make you feel good in the short term. Of course they will. But there will always be a niggling feeling in the back of your mind that you are really not healing yourself. Things like this tend to become addictive and long term make you feel ashamed because you know they're not right.

Integrity. Everybody owes it to themselves to do things they know will not harm themselves emotionally or psychologically. Anybody with intelligence and a conscience knows that acting out father/child sex is wrong whether it's in public or the privacy of your bedroom. You can't hide from yourself.

It's wrong but ultimately not because of morality, religion or social control. It's wrong because it goes against your own peace of mind.

You really are in charge of your thoughts. You've had a traumatic childhood? Your life is stressful and shit? With 100 percent certainty you won't make peace with yourself long term by acting out child abuse, violence, drinking or taking drugs. Notice your thoughts, reflect on them and then make better choices.

Sex is amazing. Connection between two people as themselves (not pretending to be children, subs, doms etc) Imagine that! Sex with someone who really really fancies you (maybe loves you) for exactly who you are. A lovable maybe middle aged woman not pretending somebody she's not. Fantastic! Better than anything else. Try it.

the words ''educating about kink'' made me roll my eyes.

You can tell people whatever nonsense you like and if they've been living happily unaware of that delusion or dysfunction heretofore, now, you're ''educating'' them. [face palm]

I think anyone who role plays that shit in the bedroom is sticking two fingers up to every poor child who has ever been sexually abused and raped by their fathers. Its just beyond the pale.

I've seen this topic more than once in unrelated fb groups. If anyone voices dissent they are shouted down for 'kinkshaming'.
I feel like our society is so fucked

Anyone who is into this shit, male or female, is quite clearly paedophilic...how is that not obvious? This is different from someone abusing actual children, sure, but the mental representation is very much the same. Not all paedophiles go on to abuse.

Across social media there is a will to normalise stuff like this it is organised. As it was in 1974.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paedophile_Information_Exchange

Yes. Pedos are rebranding themselves as MAPs (minor attracted people) now and want to be a part of Pride. Twitter is full of them.

Recommended twitter thread of how some paedos plan to normalise child sex abuse.
twitter.com/PankhurstEM/status/991258039511670784?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

It's the normalisation and mainstreaming of it that really bothers me. Like grooming on a macro scale. My DD was exposed to it by school friends when she was 13. I was horrified, but she didn't see what was wrong with it. Those friends are thankfully in the past, but I worry that she was exposed to this in formative years.

The problem being is that it doesn't take long for the taboo to seem more mundane and you have to take it up a notch. So it can change behaviour.
This all day long.
Surely if it's normalised it will then no longer be viewed as a 'kink'. Some people are then bound to naturally progress to something even more taboo to get their kicks. Where do we draw the line?

As for claiming it's merely therapeutic...bollocks. Do some yoga, meditate, have a bubble bath, talk to a therapist. I totally agree with the PP who likened it to alcohol or drugs - yes, it might make you feel better in that moment, but it's not dealing with any underlying causes of your need for such relief.

I think it’s gross and it should be judged. It’s vile. It’s men play acting abusing their daughters and women play acting being abused by their dads.

And for the people who claim it’s not about sex... it is. You just haven’t been groomed enough by your partner yet. It’ll get there. Baby steps (ha).

There needs to be an organised fight back against this.

It's not liberating, empowering, fun, playful or therapeutic it's really, really harmful. Yes, things that happen in private between two consenting adults CAN be harmful.

Is there any existing campaign? If not, could we start one? Not just about this particular niche practice but the sexual culture generally which I have seen become more and more harmful and damaging in recent years. For women, men, children, everybody. Everybody is affected by a culture in which people are not connecting to each other as real human beings.

I thought this was more about taking care of the person acting as a child rather than sex. If it's just about sex it's weird. Why would you want to imagine having sex with your daughter /dad?
Although as, two adults they can do what they want as long as they both consent. But then again I believe role play is just that :role play. Not that these men are going to go out attacking children.

Isn't all that MAP shite 4chan up to no good again, trying to make LGBT people look bad?

@EvaHoffman

There needs to be an organised fight back against this.

It's not liberating, empowering, fun, playful or therapeutic it's really, really harmful. Yes, things that happen in private between two consenting adults CAN be harmful.

Is there any existing campaign? If not, could we start one? Not just about this particular niche practice but the sexual culture generally which I have seen become more and more harmful and damaging in recent years. For women, men, children, everybody. Everybody is affected by a culture in which people are not connecting to each other as real human beings.

What are you going to do - invade bedrooms across the country and demand people have vanilla sex?? What about people who enjoy pony or puppy play? Ban them from owning animals?

Where is your analytical, independent evidence that kink is harmful?

@EvaHoffman

There needs to be an organised fight back against this.

It's not liberating, empowering, fun, playful or therapeutic it's really, really harmful. Yes, things that happen in private between two consenting adults CAN be harmful.

Is there any existing campaign? If not, could we start one? Not just about this particular niche practice but the sexual culture generally which I have seen become more and more harmful and damaging in recent years. For women, men, children, everybody. Everybody is affected by a culture in which people are not connecting to each other as real human beings.

Campaign against what? And what for? Making this sort of thing illegal?

How exactly would that work? How would it prevent people doing whatever they like in their sex lives? How would it be policed? Are random people going to be summoned to the police station on suspicion of being deviants?

Where do you draw the line? What other sexual activities will be prohibited? Will there be a list of acceptable sexual activities? What if someone disagrees with something on your list and thinks you're a deviant who needs locking up?

It's totally unrealistic to expect to be able to legally mandate what consenting adults can do sexually between themselves.

It's worth remembering that there are many places around the world which have anti-perversion or anti-sodomy laws which criminalise anything from extra-marital sex to oral sex to anal sex.

I do not want to live in a world where we police what two happily consenting adults do in private, nor do I believe it is the states place to intervene and dictate what those two people (or three or four or a whole crowd if that's your bag) can do with each other as long as everyone is of age and consenting.

@Sarahlou63

What are you going to do - invade bedrooms across the country and demand people have vanilla sex?? What about people who enjoy pony or puppy play? Ban them from owning animals?

If pony/puppy play is what I think it is, then that’s vile and surely illegal.

@Rosebel

I thought this was more about taking care of the person acting as a child rather than sex. If it's just about sex it's weird. Why would you want to imagine having sex with your daughter /dad? Although as, two adults they can do what they want as long as they both consent. But then again I believe role play is just that :role play. Not that these men are going to go out attacking children.

Having met one of these people when I was younger I can tell you it is about sex. He wanted to have sex with me and me role-play being his daughter while we were doing it. Obviously there was no second date after he'd revealed this.

You all just don't get it. Most of the time I have to have so much control in my life. The stresses of a high powered job, money worries, a child with additional needs... Sometimes you just have to let go. I regress to a childlike state because it's therapeutic and a massive stress relief. To be young and free and not think about the responsibilities of life for a bit. To wear cute clothes and feel safe and cuddled in some cute pjs with some stuffed toys. My partner reads me stories, gives me baths and cuddles me because he loves me and the time bonds us and brings us closer together.

Yeah, I don't get it. Most people are stressed & like to destress, & of course being young & carefree is great. Except I was pretty young & carefree at 18 so can "go back to that time" or have my favourite childhood meal. If I'm stressed I just meet friends, dance, do yoga, cuddle my dog instead of soft toys whilst getting a bedtime story! 😆

[quote Cadent]@Sarahlou63

What are you going to do - invade bedrooms across the country and demand people have vanilla sex?? What about people who enjoy pony or puppy play? Ban them from owning animals?

If pony/puppy play is what I think it is, then that’s vile and surely illegal.[/quote]
Do you think it means shagging or jacking off dogs and horses?

One thing I've noticed when you watch these programmes eg man in diaper, that dogging one with the animal masks, swinging etc is that everyone is quite unattractive. Do they need to have "kinks" in order to be aroused because the reality without out is not such a turn on? I mean if I had a night with Tom Hardy why on earth would I want him to dress up (hide) as a furry??!

There's some very, very strange ideas this thread. And I don't just mean the sexual practices mentioned.

Queen Elizabeth I said that she didn't want to make windows into people's souls. That was over four hundred years ago.

We don't criminalise what people think. We criminalise their acts in the world.

We have also gone beyond criminalising people's sexual acts, if they are consenting. That's because everyone is entitled to privacy. Believing that the law should deal with icky sexual preferences was the basis for criminalizing homosexual acts. But some of you want to take the law where it's never been before: criminalizing icky thoughts too. By gosh, you investigating people for naughty thoughts: that would make for a good black comedy. It could be called The Lives of Others.

Is anybody talking about policing people's thoughts? I don't think so? And nobody is talking about policing consenting adults' bedrooms either.

There is a difference between saying something is wrong and policing it. People who act out child abuse are harming themselves psychologically and perpetuating and normalising abuse. I understand what the law is though and I understand we live in a free country. I'm talking about the need for a change of attitude. It's possible. Adults aren't powerless to say no to stuff.

You can't help the thoughts you have. But you are in charge of them and you can decide not to act on them.