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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would it annoy you if someone kept texting while you were on holiday ? Aibu ?

278 replies

whatshardknock · 20/08/2020 11:59

If you were on holiday abroad for a week and someone was texting you every day would it annoy you ?
Asking if you were having fun
How the weather was etc
Aibu to think it wouldn't ?
If you were on your phone anyway on Facebook etc

OP posts:
Thehop · 20/08/2020 12:22

No “don’t forget the sun cream” you’re not his mother

No “hope you get a good tan” it sounds a bit leery.

Just leave him too it.

Give him chance to miss you if you’re hoping to restart something

Original poster
whatshardknock · 20/08/2020 12:22

I just like our chats and it's kind of a routine now to be speaking every day.
I thought he might have text me this morning.

OP posts:
Fairenuff · 20/08/2020 12:23

I wouldn't mind someone texting me but I might not reply so it would depend on whether they minded their texts being ignored for a while.

ChangeThePassword · 20/08/2020 12:23

Honestly, if someone I wasn't even dating messaged me every day when I was in holiday with pointless crap like 'don't forget the sun cream', I would be walking away. I'm an adult. I don't need reminding.

GinWithASplashOfTonic · 20/08/2020 12:24

Oh in that case let him send the next message. That might be whilst he's still ion holiday or when he gets home.

Don't say about a tan or suncream sounds a bit try hard and like you're forcing a conversation

Muggedoffa · 20/08/2020 12:24

What about what he likes? Did you discuss before he went away?
I'm going away separately from DP in a few weeks and if we message it'll be over something that can't wait, or because something funny/interesting has happened.

Original poster
whatshardknock · 20/08/2020 12:25

So back off and text /let him text when he is home?
Try and play it cool
I do want to get back with him,maybe annoying him on holiday isn't the best thing.

OP posts:
Snorlax86 · 20/08/2020 12:26

I personally would never message the above re: sun cream or tan. Also if the last message was from him and he didn’t want to respond, I would leave it for now.
I think it’s unnecessary to message anyone daily on holiday. If they want to message you then that’s different, but personally I don’t like to be bothered when I’m away. I will keep in touch with people I’m close to such as mum, sisters etc with a a photo here or there but the whole point of a holiday is to get away and it’s nice to not be on your phone as much.

Zucker · 20/08/2020 12:27

Are you afraid he'll forget you while he's away. Out of sight out of mind?

Don't send those try hard messages. Leave it to him to pace the messages while he's away.

Original poster
whatshardknock · 20/08/2020 12:28

Don't you think he was a bit rude?
Considering he was the one who was sending me pics of his hotel ?
Then I ask a question and rather him just say
"Oh yes there's entertainment" or
"No there's nothing on"
He replied
"I can't answer that right now "

OP posts:
BarbedBloom · 20/08/2020 12:29

Depends who it was. I have some friends I talk to every day, I enjoy it so would be happy if they texted me on holiday

GhostCurry · 20/08/2020 12:30

Yes, maybe it was a bit rude. So why would your reaction to that be “hope you get a good tan”?

Zucker · 20/08/2020 12:30

It sounds like an automated message alexa/google would send tbh.

lyralalala · 20/08/2020 12:30

I think if you are in a routine of texting every day it's fine, but it should be led by the person who is on holiday as some people continue as normal on holiday and some like to have less phone use.

The only thing I would say is that "I can't answer that right now" is a random thing to say if he was busy. Was it his first night there?

Original poster
whatshardknock · 20/08/2020 12:30

@GhostCurry just that was last night and today is a different day.

OP posts:
Lelophants · 20/08/2020 12:30

No because I keep my text sounds on silent and only answer them when I want to. So I wouldn't even look. Seems a bit odd they are so persistent though!

Apolloanddaphne · 20/08/2020 12:31

It sounds like he is just busy being on holiday. It would be annoying to feel you had to continually respond if you were trying to enjoy a meal/drinks and chat, or sight see, or read a book or even just snooze and listen to music in a lounger. I would back off and let him relax. Lots of people use a holiday to switch off from real life. Let him miss you not feel irritated by you.

Original poster
whatshardknock · 20/08/2020 12:31

@lyralalala yeah last night was first night there.

OP posts:
hammeringinmyhead · 20/08/2020 12:32

If you think he's been rude, texting back all shiny and happy about suncream in an effort to reassure yourself you haven't annoyed him sets a really bad precedent for the relationship.

Thecobwebsarewinning · 20/08/2020 12:33

You say this is a strange set up. If that’s a euphemistic way of saying that as well as speakIng to him you also have sex with him I would guess that texting him like that has scared him off completely.

livefornaps · 20/08/2020 12:33

To be fair, maybe he's off enjoying a holiday romance.

If anyone other than my mum said "don't forget the suncream", in my head i'd be screeching at them to fuck off. It SCREAMS neediness. Don't do it.

PuppyMonkey · 20/08/2020 12:33

Sorry OP, re automatic texts on some phoneS, there’s an option to send a prewritten reply “I can’t talk right now” “I’m in a meeting” etc. Like if something urgent came up with his kids.

VacMan · 20/08/2020 12:34

You need to occupy yourself OP instead of sitting in waiting for a messages.

Nikori · 20/08/2020 12:34

@whatshardknock

What about a "hope your getting a good tan " Or "don't forget the sun cream"?
Definitely not!!

Are you trying to get back together with him?

bridgetreilly · 20/08/2020 12:35

It would annoy me intensely. I wouldn't have replied to any of them.

But then, all my friends would know that about me and wouldn't have texted in the first place.

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