Is it just me or is everyone else's child a genius?

[Pinkmakeupbag]

Maybe I am just bitter and jealous but it seems that everyone I meet, colleagues, relatives, friends, I even see it on here. Says that their child is exceptionally bright, advanced, top of the class, excelling academically. They all also tell me their children definitely could have gone to grammar school but chose not to.

I feel I'm the only mother with perfectly average children.

Let's face5ut, they're better off being amazing socially anyway

Right?

Face it

@SimonJT hilarious!

I’m fairly frank on here. DD1 (19) is truly academically gifted and exceptionally talented in art and music.

^

How exactly? She's at Oxford? How is she gifted? Not goady but just wondering

Oh god yes! My kids started school this year and they're so far behind. What is it people say about small children being like sponges? Mine are more like bricks. Bricks with a solitary interest in Netflix.

PMSL at those who have posted to say their offspring REALLY IS a genius

My DD is only five but was clearly not one of the stars of reception. Her teachers words were she's just not as ready as some of the other children. Also she didn't understand the routine as much as many of the other children. She also sits with a ta. She's become brighter in lockdown. I'm hopeful year one will be more positive.

The thing is she's not a loud person. She's not one to be center of attention. It was always the same children at the front on any videos the school sent us. Same four girls always hogging the front spot. My DD goes for the back.

I actually think quiet or average people are so important and needed in this world. Not only for balance but they can be really good observers. Many people are not much on paper but they can build, paint, fix things, design things. It's absolutely ok to be that person. Or just being a genuinely nice person who does a simple job but makes me smile and laugh.

It's like the activities my kids class do. Ballet. Gymnastics. Swimming. They are 5 and already performing and stuff. Which is great. But it's also fine if parents can't afford that or don't have the time.

I'm an average person. I've never stood out for being brainy. I worked in pharmacy and care work before my children. I knew with care work I was right for the job. My clients all loved me. Because I went that extra mile for them. I didn't cut corners like alot of carers seemed to do. I was the only one who would wash there hair. Mainly lived off frozen meals and I would offer to make then a salad or something on toast for a change. I offered them more. some of the people I cared for told me they only liked me and were upset on my days off. I put my heart and soul into that job whilst others did it for a quick and easy ride and smoked in between calls, gossiped and had loads of sick days. Im not blowing my own trumpet. But it's sometimes the people in the background making a bigger difference.

A lot of people think their children are geniuses and a lot of people think they know a psychopath. There aren’t that many geniuses or psychopaths!

When DS was small, I felt I ought to have a facebook status saying "he's cut every single one of his teeth right at the beginning of the developmental window for that incisor/canine/molar", because that was the only thing he was ahead of the curve on.

He's utterly lovely, kind, funny, good at making friends... Just hoping to get him out the other end of secondary with enough qualifications that he has some options in life.

I'm a university lecturer. I sometimes encounter students who believe they are geniuses, clearly because their parents have told them they are. I don't think I have ever taught a true genius at any point in my career. One or two have been outstanding. And there have been quite a few bright and academically talented students. But by the time they reach university, the accelerated learners and the slow starters are essentially indistinguishable. If my life depended on it I couldn't identify which students started reading at 3 and which were unable to read until the age of 7 or 8.

PMSL at those who have posted to say their offspring REALLY IS a genius

Why? I shared my son's reality which breaks my heart and you're pissing yourself laughing about it?

My sister is a ‘proper genius’ and it has done her no good. She is Mid-forties, she has a Career/profession and is respected but she made some bad life choices relationship wise and has paid dearly for it both financially and emotionally. Academic achievement is no guarantee of a ‘good life’ unfortunately.

My friend has a genius child. Well behaved and scrupulously clean. My children are happy, funny, bright enough and slightly feral.

Wouldn't trade for the world. Other kid is a total bore and total suck up, imagine the adult he will become.

Don't take any notice of the boasting of other parents.

@ThursdayLastWeek

I’m a tiny bit worried one of mine is a total dumbass. I’m hoping it’s just too early to tell...

Literally snorted at this

I think the word "gifted" is so wanky, it's embarrassing when people use it. Makes it sound as if their child is more special than others. Also when people think their toddlers are "gifted" as well, it's all bullshit. PFB.

My DS is good at maths but not so great at writing. I think he's pretty average at schoolwork although he's only 7 so who knows what he will be like in a few years? I wouldn't put a label on him so young.

If it makes you feel any better, my four year old is behind for his age. It’s not just me saying that - his nursery teacher has raised concerns. He can count to ten, knows his colours and that’s about it. He can’t draw anything identifiable, doesn’t know any letters, can’t copy a letter if I draw it for him. I do talk about it to friends/family and they say things like “Oh he’ll catch up, they all do in the end”. Hopefully they’re right. But if he doesn’t, that’s fine too, I just want him to be happy and find something he enjoys in life.

I had one very academic, the others were bright enough (average?) but definitely lazy. I've had the angel baby who slept and fed and was no bother and I've had two total monsters who would have tried the patience of a saint (and I'm not a saint so they drove me insane) I've had sporty ones and non sporty ones, good eaters and picky eaters, healthy ones who never needed to see a doctor, an accident prone one who visited A & E so often they took to taking him off on his own to ask where mummy was when he split his head open/broke his leg/lost the end of his finger and one who regularly had dramatic ambulances rides to hospital with more conditions than any child should have.

I think I took more than my fair share of the difficult ones and just average would strike me as a win. Having said that they are all grown up, in one piece and doing OK career wise so I don't think I did too much damage.

I'm sure yours are lovely kids, enjoy.

@FatCatThinCat because as I see it, the intention and tone of the thread is for people to reply to OP that they too have a distinctly average or below child.

I think it's quite amusing how 'boastful' some DPs are, my DS did his A levels last year, no one in his friendship group got A*s, I think one of them got an A ... but they all ended up at the Uni of their choice or an apprentice and seem perfectly happy.

@DotForShort

I'm a university lecturer. I sometimes encounter students who believe they are geniuses, clearly because their parents have told them they are. I don't think I have ever taught a true genius at any point in my career. One or two have been outstanding. And there have been quite a few bright and academically talented students. But by the time they reach university, the accelerated learners and the slow starters are essentially indistinguishable. If my life depended on it I couldn't identify which students started reading at 3 and which were unable to read until the age of 7 or 8.

This is interesting. I wonder if kids really do ‘level off’ or whether parents look at their 3 year old who knows their alphabet and think ‘my work is done’ and just assume they’ll always be ahead? Rather than foster it, iyswim?

I think having a genius child is kind of pointless if they’re not being given information to learn. Isn’t it a bit like having a ridiculously powerful computer but only using it to play minesweeper?

I think the word "gifted" is so wanky, it's embarrassing when people use it.

Even worse is when people refer to themselves by the truly nauseating acronym POGO (Parent Of Gifted Offspring). So cringeworthy.

TBH I'd worry more about parents who don't think their kids are anything special and are determined to call them average.

Mine is very bright. Still has complex special needs.

I was always delighted that DC were average = they didn't have problems. What kind of job do you have, OP? Clever kids tend to come from clever parents & you may just live in a bubble of relatively clever people.

Me, I got welfare mom on benefits for SIL, cousins who failed to finish high school, a DC who was a determined under-achiever. DH failed the 11+. We're more ordinary.