DH says I’m an embarrassing nerd

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I play the Sims. I have lately taken to building and have built a number of homes. I’m getting really into it and have renovated a whole town. I have created an instagram page for my Sims game and share all my builds on there as well as my stories. My next project is making an abandoned Wild West town like the ones we have come across in America. This will likely take a month or so and then once I’m done I’ll move families into it who will then renovate the town.

Last night DH came across my Instagram and went off on one saying I’m a complete giant nerd and he sent the pics to all his family and to his mate. His mate asked if him if I’ve stopped playing grandma turismo because he kept beaten me. DH didn’t know I was playing this car game online with his mate and is now saying I’m an embarrassment and I’ll be the joke of his work place.

Wtf. Is it really so bad to have interests that don’t affect anyone else even if I am a Middle Aged woman?

That's just plain mean! You sound like the kind of person I'd love to be friends with!

Don't lose your passion or feel bad about your passion because of his negative feelings towards it.

It's the classic selfish attitude of someone who doesn't understand that just because he's not into it then anyone who is must be weird.
I love gaming. I Minecraft a lot and my second favourite is Civilization VI. Someone asks me what I did that day I say "Oh I started a war with France." then they don't ask again!
Keep the Sims, ditch the bloke. There's bound to be a good Sims discord too.

You’re an interesting person with hobbies and skills at those hobbies. You’re cool.

Your DH sounds like a prat who’s only bothered about what his ‘friends’ think. He’s a vacuum that sucks joy out of other people’s enjoyment. He’s the sad one and I’m sorry you have had that reaction from him.

Keep the hobbies - tell the nasty ‘H’ to fuck off.

grandma turismo

That's so horrible!
Why would he share it to his family and friend if its so embarrassing?
It's so sad that your husband who is supposed to be on your side would deliberately try to shame you and try to get other people on his side too.

I hope you tell him to fuck off and carry on doing what you enjoy.

I've never been able to build well in the Sims, so I'm jealous! I watch YouTube videos but can never recreate them...

Having 'nerdy' interests is the opposite of embarrassing. I love the Sims, Buffy, Dr Who, Pokemon etc and have been surprised how many people say the same once you start talking about it.

I've only recently parked Sims as it was eirily similar to my life in lockdown (freelance career, kids on screens, overgrown garden, and getting freaked out with vampires knocking on my door).

Animal Crossing is ace.

Husband is an arse.

I'm playing the sims on my phone and I also have it on my laptop when I have time to play it. Your husband is a prick.

Ooh thay sounds a great way to play!

I've barred myself from Sims til the kids are teenagers as I'll abandon them to play. I'm definetly trying your way when I go back.

pm me your IG page so I can follow!

Was he serious? I'd say that's verbal/emotional abuse. Have whatever hobbies you want and express yourself however you want. If he gets all arsey about how you choose to do you, he's an arsehole.

A decent man might find it amusing, but they'd be happy that you're doing your thing.

All my builds look like glorified boxes, and I have no eye for dressing Sims either! Love up skilling them and maxing levels on careers - so I'm jealous of your creative vision!

There is only one embarrassment in your relationship & it isn’t you.

Your DH is a knobhead.
I'm a sci fi nerd, love all things space, science fiction etc - difference is DH doesn't laugh at me and send pics to his mates and say he'll be embarassed at work (how old is he, 5?!)
Ignore him, you're entitled to your hobbies and likes and it's his issue, not yours!

I believe only 4 people in the entire world bought and played Sims. I think the statistics are on your side on this one

This reminds me when Ds1 was 10 and people told him Pokemon was for "babies" so I showed him thousands of adults dressed in Pokemon cosplay outfits.

If he is so embarrassed by you why would he have shared it? It is to belittle you, to humiliate you. I would be questioning why he would want to do that.

Enjoy Sims, your Dh is a tosser and a bully.

@UtterlyUnimaginativeUsername

What an absolute shit of a man. That's so nasty!

You must have had a wonderfully pampered life so far, if you think calling someone a nerd is being 'an absolute shit.'

Personally I wouldn't even bother to raise my eyes from the screen as I gave him a two-fingered salute and carried on with my game.

So rude.

We all have our vices, my husband plays online chess for hours and battles on one of those battle/island games.

I wouldn't take the piss out of him.

Look. As Beyonce says: 'Who Runs the world-nerds (nerds!)' He's jealous you have an interest or missing the two of you watching tv together or he's rubbish at Sims or something. Good for you OP!

What a horrible excuse for a man.

Someone who loves you wouldn't shame you like that.

Not played the Sims in years. Maybe I will! Would love to see your insta!

You might be interested in historical archetecture-a lot of people are building whole models of ancient rome you can look around etc. in computer programs which have come from game technology. I find it fascinating.

It sounds fun tbh. My Dh is enormously geeky and spends evenings painting plastic miniatures and is looking forward to playing games again in the near future. I rather like knowing he’s so happy with his hobby. Have whatever hobbies you want and don’t let others spoil your fun.

Oh and I love Pokemon Go. @Timeforabiscuit I had someone say animal crossing is great a while back, but was a bit put off by it being 'pay to play.' Is it expensive? I end up buying stuff in Pokemon anyway, so it's not really free.

Sorry but your dh sounds like a nasty piece of work. Was he the school bully when he was younger?

It’s made me cringe to think that HE is embarrassed of YOU when his attitude is painfully embarrassing. Does he lack imagination generally? He obviously can’t cope with the idea of you being interested in something that he doesn’t deem “cool” enough!!
Especially during lockdown, I play creative minecraft and find it really satisfying building a world. It’s pure escapism which is what most of us need - no different to reading a book, exercising, taking the dog for a walk etc. It’s no one’s place to judge what you do in your spare time to relax as long as its not hurting anyone - so what very grown-up things does your DH do?

He's been rude no doubt but it sounds like this has come as a big surprise to him, especially you playing with his mate. Do you not communicate?

To be honest, if my H had an insta page dedicated to football (for example) I'd find that a tad extreme and embarrassing.

But him shaming you like that to his family isn't on.

Is his mate single?