My friend has stopped paying for things ..aibu to mention it?

[berryberry44]

My friend will ask me to get things from town whilst I'm up (just stupid things like shampoo or a candle etc ) but never gives me the money.
Yesterday I dropped off around £10 worth of things and she took the bag and didn't mention paying.
Then we went out for lunch and I said il get the taxi there and you pay back.
She said no problem,il give you the money for back and you can use your Uber account.
Then she gave me half the taxi fare(I don't know how she thought that was correct)
Then popped in Superdrug and I had a few things,she hands me those and says "can you pay for these and il give you money,I hate paying with my card"
I said no,I said it gets too confusing.
Can we just pay for our own things.
Aibu to say that ?
Do I mention that she never pays ?

We have been friends for over 15 years but you can't say anything to her or she fly's off the handle.
She knows I won't ever ask for it.
I feel cheeky saying "that's £10.25 please "
If someone was coming to mine with things I had asked them to get,I would have the money ready.
You know you have to pay for things.
I don't get it.

Have you asked for the money back - she could pay today for what she owes by PayPal or bank transfer.

I'd be so fed up with this I'd be thinking about ending the friendship. Why would anybody sponge of a friend like this. It's pretty low.

She is taking the piss.

Could you text her, something simple like ‘just totting up what you owe me for the bits and pieces, I’m running a bit short this month so could you either PayPal me or I can pop over for the cash, let me know which one is good for you’!

She sounds a shit friend.

I feel cheeky saying "that's £10.25 please

That makes no sense whatsoever. She doesn’t feel cheeky asking you to pay though does she.

I think you’re afraid of her reaction.

She knows I won't ever ask for it.

That’s your issue. And that she’ll ‘fly off the handle’.

You need to refuse to pay for anything and stop doing her favours. She needs to do her own shopping.

I don’t have any friends I’d treat like this - sending them on errands for me. My mum might ask me to pick something up for her, but friends - no.

Just stop saying yes to the ‘favours’.

YOU feel cheeky? Wow. You need to stand up for yourself. Or get some nicer friends. She is horrible.

You have to say no. She’s likely to get pissed off with you but you can’t let her keep taking advantage

"I can look for the pjs but do you have the money for them if I get them today? I cant really afford to buy you anything else and have to wait to get the money back. "
Cant she shop online?

Also, stop mentioning to her that you're going to the shops

Just saw your other post about flying off the handle. What do you get out of the friendship?

Grow a pair and ask her for the money. It’s your money, why are you feeling weird about it?

Ask her if you have MUG tattooed across your forehead. Then find your backbone and stop letting her use you to fund her lifestyle. FGS Op, do you let everyone use you like this? Ask yourself if you would treat a friend like this, or anyone in fact. Why would you go out to work to earn money just to hand it over to someone else?

She's using the threat of her anger to get her own way. She knows people are nervous that she'll explode if challenged so she gets away with stuff!

You really need to learn to be more assertive. asking someone to give you money THEY owe YOU is not cheeky & if you don't think you'll get the £50 back she already owes you cut your losses & ghost her.

You also should read the thread about teaching our daughters to tell people to fuck off.

Just say "No"! She's using you and she's no friend. I would suggest avoiding contact with her.

You have two options really.

You either continue to let her take the piss out of you whilst inwardly fuming about this.

Or

You grow a pair and stop being worried about her reaction and tell her in the nicest possible way that you can't continue to shell out for her shit without being repaid.

I don't think there's anything further we can add really 🤷‍♀️

Your seem a bit of a walkover, OP. What made me say that it's the taxi. If she already owed you a whole lot, you should have said, "You owe me for quite a few bits and bobs, so if you pay the taxi it'll probably cover most of it." Why on earth did you use to pay the way there?! She's either taking advantage of really oblivious to money. B either way she needs you to put your foot down.

What you have there is a freeloader...not a friend

I don't care if you've been friends 50 years let alone 15, she is taking the piss out of you. She's seeing you as free money. You have to stand up for yourself. So sorry, it must be really upsetting. Don't let her do it.

What? Why won't you ever ask for it? And if she knows that you won't ask for it, she's just plain robbing you! She sounds like a shit friend.

Are you always so passive?

You are being an absolute doormat and I’m not sure anything you’re told here is going to change that if you feel “cheeky” asking for your own money back

Dump her and move on.....after asking for your money back. Flies off the handle indeed?!!She sounds like a bully.