To think that the worst thing you could be in life is fat.

[Dylaninthemovies1]

It just seems that no matter how successful a woman is in life, none of it matters, if she isnt slim (and preferably pretty too)

And, Online forums seem to be full of fat haters who are very smug and judgemental

Oprah’s not slim.

But she spends a ridiculous amount
Of her life trying to get slim or stay slim

I know what you mean and how it can feel like that, but really, there are many worse things to have than a weight problem. At least that can be altered. Many things can’t.

God no, there are way worse things. Is this a goady thread?

SM and the internet are not reflective of real life. In real life if you're overweight you just are who you are and life goes on. On MN if you're overweight you'll be talked about and judged harshly.

I know people in real life who are overweight and can't think of any of them who've had career or relationship issues because of it.

The world is fucked up with children dying and people starving and you're moaning that the worst thing is being fat? #firstworldproblems

Nope! Not a goody thread! Just feels like no matter what I do, I won’t be successful unless I’m slim.

I see that with other women who I think are successful: they have a massive amount of focus on losing weight

eh ?

@Cadent I don’t mean that it really is the worst thing: but on MN you come into a huge amount of judgement for being above a size 10 or having a BMI over 23

OP are you serious? This reads very badly if you in fact believe what you posted. There's far worse things to be in life, like ignorant and self absorbed.

Personally I think the worst thing to be is an abuser of children, animals, other people, but I do really understand what you are saying.

Fat shaming is endemic and Boris having declared war on obesity gives some people licence to up the ante.
I think it’s a misogynistic issue to, as I see a lot of obese men who are clearly neither bothered nor hindered by their weight, but every woman I know has struggled at some point.
No answer, it just sucks.

I said YANBU because I know what you mean. I think it is an online vs RL thing though.

Sidebar of shame, influencers, celebs losing all their baby weight in nanoseconds - it all contributes to that feeling.

But I think IRL people would say that the worst thing to be in life would be along the lines of violent, sexual predator, racist etc

Op, I have one leg. What I wouldn’t give to know what it is like to run or even just walk without a limp. I only swim in private pools as I can’t bear the staring and questions from other people..

Being fat would be an issue I could cope with.

I get your point op. Unfortunately mumsnet is one of those forums which on the whole, has a distinct unfriendliness towards fat people. Just in the last couple of days I've seen Fat people are lazy, and just need to eat less, and if they get ill the gp shouldn't have to treat them unless they promise to lose weight.

I’m overweight. I’m also happily married, with a lovely home of my own, professionally successful, have a large and loving circle of friends and a degree from a top university. Would I like to lose weight? Yes, undoubtedly. But I don’t feel that being overweight detracts from any of my achievements. And I don’t generally bother to read threads on MN or other SM that mention fat or weight in the title (this one being an exception).

Being slim is better than being fat. It is. And people will judge people who are fat as lazier and stupider.
It's horrid but it's the truth sadly.
As a former fatty who struggles with their weight being slimmer is definitely better. Everything is better when you're slimmer, but I'm still the same person (albeit much healthier and much more attractive).

Oh don’t be ridiculous. There are plenty of things worse than being fat.

And, I realise that for some people, being fat is an eating disorder deep rooted in various issues but for many people it is entirely fixable. So if it’s that bad, there is a choice there.

Or is this thread set up just to argue at this kind of stuff?

I assume the OP is being ironic?

I’m fat. It’s not the worst thing at all. I would rather be slimmer but otherwise my life is fine. It’s really not the worst thing. That’s a mindset. I can think of a million different things that are worse than carrying some extra weight.

Okay..people please read OP first. Granted the thread title made me come in here like..."What did you just say?" but after reading the OP, I realise OP is coming at it from the perspective of those who basically talk about being fat (whether theirs or others') like it's the worst thing in the world - like some type of plague or disgusting disease.

OP. I get you and it's ludicrous. I rarely click on posts here where people are moaning about being fat too and I quickly scroll past the odd mention of fat from posters on threads. The obsession is ingrained and not much anyone can do till they realise this themselves.

Your thread title was click baity, that got me to click!

No, there are a lot worse things.....but this is MN and unless you are a size 6 then you're the worlds most despicable person.

This forum is not the right place for discussions about weight.

I think OP is suggesting that this is the impression given by others - that as long as she is fat, it doesn’t matter how good she is everywhere else - how smart or how funny or how successful or how wel-dressed. To some people, that may be true. But fuck em. Just keep being your best person. Keep trying to be healthy but don’t fall into the trap of believing you’re as valuable as the shape of your body because that’s simply not true.

@Dreamersandwishers

Personally I think the worst thing to be is an abuser of children, animals, other people, but I do really understand what you are saying.

Fat shaming is endemic and Boris having declared war on obesity gives some people licence to up the ante.
I think it’s a misogynistic issue to, as I see a lot of obese men who are clearly neither bothered nor hindered by their weight, but every woman I know has struggled at some point.
No answer, it just sucks.

Boris isn't exactly a 'Slim Jim' himself, is he? Perhaps he should set an example.

I suppose it's alright for men to be "big" not fat and women must be dainty.

I don't believe that is true OP. A person's weight does not define who they are.
There is ignorance everywhere from others.
I've noticed some posters being upset over obesity comments yet vilify smoker's or mock the working class without a second thought.
It is best to ignore other's opinions on you or things that hurt you.
If you feel you're been held back professionally speak up, I hope things improve.

Society endlessly bombards women with the message that they are worthless/pigs/ugly if they are fat. Just because some people don't like it doesn't mean all people don't like it. We all have a type or preferences, but fat can be very sexy and attractive.

I hear oeople say things to friends like, oh you’ve got such a pretty face/ great personality as if that’s why people like them, as to say despite their weight. I wish I could look as good as some of my bigger friends...

People can find different body shapes attractive. I wish people would stop perpetuating this bull shit and shaming people who are fat or fancy fat people.

Fat does not equal worthless. However, I reckon the negative narratives around being overweight knock your confidence so much it must be hard to see yourself as a stone cold hotty and confidence is sexy...