To expect step daughter to move rooms?

[twinnursery]

Long time lurker but first time poster.

DH has a 7yo DD from a previous relationship. She's with us every other week. We have a 2yo DD together and are expecting twin boys. We live in a 4 bedroom house, all 4 are double rooms. Smallest 2 are identical in size. Currently 2yo is in one of the "small" rooms and 7yo is in the larger one, with me and DH in the master. I think 7yo should be in the other "small" one (but as I said, it's not actually that small) and the twins should be in the bigger room since there will be 2 of them, and they'll be living here all the time. DH thinks the twins should have the smaller room since they're younger. Just to avoid drip feeding, twins will be in our room for around 6 months but I want to sort out bedrooms before we have 2 newborns in the house. Also won't be moving any time soon so would rather have a long term solution now.

YANBU - twins should have the bigger room
YABU - twins should have the smaller room

YANBU

She's 7 - you are a family with four children. SD or BD she shouldn't be pandered to, it's very obvious that which ever children share (how ever you want the combination to work) the ones that share get the bigger rooms. I'd just sell it/ tell her like that. You don't get the privilege of the bigger room to yourself.

Yeah I would be questioning why he is insisting on you doing it all, it seem like he's either making a point or his primary reason for objecting to the idea before was pure laziness. Not great either way given you are pregnant with twins. But I'm glad it's sorted out and your DSD is happy, anyway!

Thank you for the update OP, but please tell me you put your foot down with your DH and tell him he's not letting his pregnant wife doing the actual work!

Being in charge of decorating is ok ONLY if it means making the decision and planning the theme - not painting the entire room whilst pregnant - and with twins!

Paint made me nauseous and gave me headaches when I was pregnant...

@twinnursery

Just thought I'd come on and update everyone. DH agreed that she should move as long as I'm in charge of decorating (), so we all went shopping this morning to buy paint, furniture etc. We phrased it as her getting a new room because she's such a good big sister, she was ok with it which is a bonus. Thanks for giving your thoughts for those of you who did.

Well I'm glad she's OK with it which is the most important thing.

Much less impressed by your DH telling you that you're in charge of decorating - does he mean just choosing and buying the things with her or does he expect you to actually do the decorating yourself while you're pregnant with twins?!

How accommodating of him to agree so long as you deal with the decorating. What a twat.

Are you planning to BF your twins? If so then yes they need to be in with you, but DH will have to help with every feed which may affect his work. You can't (easily, safely) do it alone.

If you can't or choose not to - you may decide to do what I did and sleep in with the twins for the first 6 months. I couldn't BF so it seemed pointless to disturb DH's sleep when he was working. I had a single bed and the twins shared a cot at first, then had separate cots after a while. In case you find yourself in that situation, would a smaller room be big enough for all that? I think you need to plan for all eventualities....

They will need full size single or bunk beds from about three - so I do agree now is a good time to move the 7 year old. If you get her really engaged with the new arrivals and the planning, she may be happy to help you with your changes. Much easier than several years down the line when she's getting hormonal.....! Good luck!

I've have three boys - rooms have just evolved. Youngest currently has double bed in small room, eldest high sleeper in small room, middle one bunk beds in big room. Big room has maiden for drying washing and tumble dryer so there's a trade off! It's nice to have your own room to escape to and the big room is often the hub of all the games. Swings and roundabouts. Lucky to have their own rooms! My mum slept top to tail with her 10-year younger sister until she got married and moved out. And her two brothers did the same.