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Original poster

To think most women keep hair long to be attractive to the opposite sex?

999 replies

Ilovegreentomatoes · 19/07/2020 22:33

It's always been said men prefer long hair it looks more feminine etc.
I know many women hate having their hair short and are devastated if their hairdresser cuts of more than an inch.What is the obsession with long hair? I have fine hair and cut it short because long hair looks crap on me but I'm definitely in the minority. Even women who look better with short hair because of their hair texture insist on keeping it long. Do you think that's because we are subconsciously taught mainly by men that long hair is more attractive. Plus all teen girls have that uniform ultra long hair there is no diversity. And no I'm not jealous because I have short hair!(well very short bob to be fair.)

OP posts:
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Original poster
Ilovegreentomatoes · 19/07/2020 22:59

Ever noticed how all the Disney princess/ barbie dolls have that really long thick hair? Like that is the ultimate in female beauty.

OP posts:
heartsonacake · 19/07/2020 23:00

No, I keep my hair long because I think short hair looks ugly on women. I’ve never seen it suit a woman, ever. Celebrity or otherwise.

Canyousewcushions · 19/07/2020 23:00

I love mine short but the maintenance is too much- it needs to be washed and blowdried every morning unless I want it sticking out in all directions.

A bit longer and it sits better when it's been allowed to dry naturally, I don't need to wash it every day and it can be tied up to get it out of the way if required. Plus I can go longer between cuts- it was 6 weekly when short. I do have sections of super short undercut now, so I still need to go every couple of months to keep it looking good.

betteliefsen · 19/07/2020 23:01

@Illdealwithitinaminute

Hair length is an age thing.

Last year I went to a conference, there was about 200 women there over the age of 35/40 I guess (and some men) and every single one apart from me had either bob or short length hair. I couldn't believe it, I kept checking (it was not an interesting conference). So, women either believe long hair is for the under 40's or prefer shorter hair or feel they will be condemned for having long hair or as they age their hair grows less well, or any combination of these factors.

It is very hard for female teens to have short hair without it become a political identity statement, my dd had her hair cut and she got non-stop remarks about lesbians at school, mistaken for trans in the street (and then the person was rude), it was very tiresome as she simply liked shorter hair. She was very mature about it as she has lots of lesbian/trans friends, many of whom have long hair anyway, but it was tiring and she grew her hair out even though if all things had been equal I think she might have kept the short hair.

I love my long hair, I'll be the 80 year old with long hair, I just don't care if it looks incongruous.

I had short hair as a child and a teenager and it's been getting long ever since, now I'm mid 50s and until I cut it last week it was nearly down to my waist. I've still got thick curly hair which is showing no sign of thinning out and I like it so I'm keeping it long.
rosiejaune · 19/07/2020 23:01

There is clearly sexism involved in average hair length, as men's hair would grow long if they let it, but you see very few men with long hair.

You could argue therefore that most women are just doing the natural thing and allowing it to grow. But then why do men cut theirs?

Because they don't want to look like women? In which case that's their sexism.

Because it isn't practical? In which case that's our sexism (albeit likely prompted by perceived male expectations, as you imply), as it would also be more practical for women to have short hair too, and not spend ages washing and drying and brushing and curling it or whatever.

I felt pressure from my mum to have long hair, and I hated having it brushed as a child. Now I have it very short (cut with clippers) and I much prefer it. I do think many other women would enjoy having short hair more if they didn't feel pressure from society to look stereotypically feminine.

And I think what a lot people are calling short hair on this thread is what I would call medium length, as you don't need to do anything at all to it if it's actually short.

notheragain4 · 19/07/2020 23:02

Short hair is high maintenance, well it is for me, 6 weekly trims and then I'd have to blow dry and style it everyday. Long hair I can wash every other day, dry naturally if I choose or just tie up, and I only get it trimmed every 12 weeks or so. You also need to find the coveted excellent hairdresser for a quality short style.

Nothing to do with wanting to appease the opposite sex for me, I just want an easier life!

RednaxelasLunch · 19/07/2020 23:03

If long hair really is just about comfort and ease of styling then men would have long hair too...

I've had it all ways from waist length to super short crop. Liked both. A definite aura of intimidation with the crop which can be advantageous.

Original poster
Ilovegreentomatoes · 19/07/2020 23:03

@heartsonacake bit of a sweeping statement dont you think?

OP posts:
maddy68 · 19/07/2020 23:04

Erm no. I keep it long do I can tie it up when I'm hot and gave different styles when I feel like it

SchrodingersImmigrant · 19/07/2020 23:04

Is this like the pubic hair debate and basically every answer is wrong?

AwkwardMoment2020 · 19/07/2020 23:05

Ever noticed how all the Disney princess/ barbie dolls have that really long thick hair? Like that is the ultimate in female beauty.

Haha, that’s literally what people say to me if I wear mine down... “you have Princess Jasmine/Pocahontas hair. Don’t EVER cut it!”

It’s a fun compliment but I don’t care to be honest. I’m not my hair. I’m an academic. I’m a good person. I’ve even donated my hair to make wigs for kids with cancer in the past.

You can have the princess hair and not be a vain hussy just in it for the men.

Ragwort · 19/07/2020 23:05

Like others I have long hair because I am lazy and it is much easier (& cheaper) maintenance' than when I had short hair ... I just tie it back, have a trim maybe twice a year. Didn't bother me at all that I couldn't visit a hairdresser during lockdown .... can't believe the amount of money people spend on their hair. No idea if my DH likes my hair or not.

thenightsky · 19/07/2020 23:06

I had my hair in a short, sharp bob for years. Then 3 years ago, I went to stay with friends in Tanzania for a month and had a short spikey cut due to lack of shower facilities. Not had it cut since and its now down to my waist. I like it now, as I can wash and leave down or shove in a bun. The bob was the most 'needy' cut ever.

Tinkerbellone · 19/07/2020 23:06

I have quite square features; long jaw line, high forehead. I keep my hair long to look feminine and to look as attractive as I can! I don't think there is anything wrong in wanting to look your best.
Also, generally men prefer long hair, I'm single... come on boys GrinGrinlol!!!

Coldilox · 19/07/2020 23:06

I’m gay so I don’t give a shiny shot about looking attractive to the opposite sex. I have long hair. Had it short for a while but it doesn’t really suit me, and I prefer it long. I also find it easier to manage.

I find both short hair and long hair attractive on women. Depends on what they suit.

iVampire · 19/07/2020 23:06

If long hair really is just about comfort and ease of styling then men would have long hair too...

Some of them do. And I think it can look terrific

Original poster
Ilovegreentomatoes · 19/07/2020 23:07

Would love to see a Disney female character rocking a short cut for a change!

OP posts:
GotGameByThePound · 19/07/2020 23:08

I don't give a shit what men think of my long hair, but I love when other women comment how jealous they are of it 💁🏼‍♀️

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 19/07/2020 23:08

I'm 40, I have really long hair, it's not to be attractive to anyone, it's because I can't be arsed faffing about at hairdressers every 2 months 🤷‍♀️

Twillow · 19/07/2020 23:08

Long hair is for ease, for me. I hate haircuts and all the palaver of maintaining a 'style'.

runninguphills · 19/07/2020 23:08

I have long blonde wavy hair. I get lots of compliments on it so I suppose it's more attractive.

It suits me as I have a round shaped face. I have it long as it so easy to manage. I have it trimmed once a year and I wash and leave it dry naturally - its incredibly low maintenance.

I've had short hair before - it was a nightmare. It had to be styled every day and grew out almost immediately.

I'm sticking to my long hair. If it makes me more attractive to men - that's great!

Canyousewcushions · 19/07/2020 23:09

@heartsonacake that's a really horrible sexist statement.

It might look less stereotypically feminine, but that doesn't make it ugly.

WinterAndRoughWeather · 19/07/2020 23:09

Sure @SchrodingersImmigrant, I bet you wear high heels for you too.

Who wouldn’t want to damage their spine, for themselves?

Yester · 19/07/2020 23:09

It's an impossible issue to answer. We have had so much social conditioning that girls have long hair and that long hair is attractive that even if we thought we weren't influenced by it we wouldn't be able to separate it from years of images of long hair = sexy/femine.

squeekums · 19/07/2020 23:09

Ever noticed how all the Disney princess/ barbie dolls have that really long thick hair? Like that is the ultimate in female beauty.
And what those of us with long hair and need educating? Must change cos barbie? Think we only have long hair cos we dream of being barbie?

If long hair really is just about comfort and ease of styling then men would have long hair too

I see nothing easy about having to style every morning instead of wack it in a bun
Nothing easy or cheap about short hair maintenance