Did you deliberately put off having kids?

[Lostatsea1988]

There are 101 threads here on MN about people who had kids later in life e.g. because they didn't meet their partner until their late thirties, because they remarried, because they couldn't afford it earlier, because they were tied up with career / studying - so many valid reasons.

I am just interested to know if anyone put off having kids until they were say 40ish on purpose, just because they were enjoying life? Do you regret it?

The situation is:
married (so happily!)
house
good salaries (could afford childcare easily)
good mat leave package
good careers
savings

.....but really having a fun life and would like to stretch it out for another 7/8/9 years before trying for kids.

Aware of the risks of putting it off but feel (this end of 30) that the joy 7/8/9 more years of fun and freedom would bring me would be a price worth paying if kids don't happen for us.

Was anyone else in this situation (i.e. could have had kids early 30s but deliberately put it off)? Did you go on to have kids at age 40-ish? If not was it because you realised you didn't want them or was it because of fertility problems.

I think I struggle with the idea of it being just us forever: no neices or nephews! Just us every Christmas

That really is one of the worst reasons I've ever heard for contemplating kids.

It does nit have to be that way without kids. You can spend it with friends, go see your families, go on holiday.....

OP, why do you think fun will stop when you have a child? People go on exotic holidays with babies, continue having career, eat out etc. If anything a child might enhance all these experiences when you see them trying things you love for the first time etc

Maybe OP means what holidays bring out... the r'aison e'tre for existence etc. Children makes families. Otherwise it's just two adults.

In terms of exotic holidays, careers and eating out, yes maybe some lucky folks continue with the same fun, but hand on heart for me and a lot of my friends, on precisely these 3 examples we wouldn't exactly say these experiences have been "enhanced". BUT there will be different holidays, different career paths and different eating out - some I enjoy more, some less so.

If I didn't have children, I probably just be drifting in life. Wealthier and more senior in the same job, but probably a very bored workaholic (I am not the sort who would be saving refugees, fighting wars, CEO of a company - children or not). But some people might do...

People always focus on the baby years but usually there are about 50 years of parenthood, if you had kids at 30-40 and lived to 80-90.