WIBU to ask neighbour to stop ululating?!

[Confrontayshunme]

My neighbour (terraced houses) who I am really close to since lockdown and having her baby in February makes a strange ululating sound to calm her very colicky, refluxy baby, and I can hear it through the thinnish walls. It is similar to when I used to hoover to calm my colicky newborn. She makes a high pitched "lololololololo" sound whenever he cries to sort of drown him out and calm him. It clearly works as he stops crying.

Only now he is 5 months old, and still waking and crying frequently, only the crying is getting louder and so is the noise she makes. Add to this the fact that it is hot and her baby's room is next to our bedroom with both sets of windows open for coolness.

Now I am all for people calming a crying baby, as that is a terrible sound on its own, but it is getting to the point that we can barely watch tv in the evenings or go to sleep and are frequently woken at all hours by this high pitched screeching.

And to be abundantly clear, she is white and English, as are her partner, parents and grandparents. The sound she makes is exactly like I have heard at an Indian friend's wedding party, but it is clearly not cultural, just a fluke that calms her baby.

AIBU to ask her to figure out a quieter way to calm her baby, at least between 10 and 6 or 7?

I found a youtube video which is exactly the sound for a better idea of the sound.

What Ishihtzuknot said. I find it really disturbing that she would just essentially shout over the baby.

Do you see the baby much? By five months he should be crying less, not more.

I would wonder about his welfare (yes I know that sounds OTT, but she has been shocking the baby into silence/drowning out her baby's cries for five months now and he is crying more). I think there is cause for concern.

Why the fuck would anyone ever think it’s a good idea to train their child to clam down to that sound? That’s insane. Why would she want to be repeating that sound all day every day?

I would have to have a word.

It’s a horrible noise.

You’ll be snapping and farting next OP.

Bloody hell! I couldn’t cope with that X number of times every day!
That’s just bonkers.

Definitely, definitely not! English probably for 500 years back. Their last name is like Smith/Jones. And her ex-Partner is white and English as well.

Thank you all! My DH and I were thinking that if we can hear her, she can probably hear our two shrieky children (one who plays beginner violin) and occasional barny, so we ignored it for as long as we could, but it is getting excessive (3-4 times in a day, a few times in evening and twice a night). Each time lasts about 5 minutes, and while my kids are noisy, it isn't quite so constant and definitely not in the night.

I clicked on the thread thinking the title was a typo for 'urinating' 😂

The question is: what do I SAY?

"Pardon me, but your ululating is bothering our sleep?"
Or
"Hey, that weird noise has made my cat claw my thighs multiple times from upset! Knock it off!"

I just feel really bad because her DP left her with a three week old with reflux, six cats and a year old Jack Russell puppy at the beginning of lockdown, and she has had no interaction with any other parents or health visitors. I know she is just doing whatever it take to get by, but I am loopy from it.

I suggest joining in with a Tarzan call every time you hear her, maybe she will get the hint that noise travels
The obvious solution.

God, your link really made me laugh. I don't know why, I was definitely not expecting that sound!
I'm trying to imagine a woman ululating across the house to a young baby and it has me in hysterics.

YWNBU

I'd have told her months ago. There's no way a loud, screeching, obnoxious noise like that settles a baby down. Scares them, confuses them? Probably.
Like when you squeeze a squeaky toy and a dog tilts its head.
I feel sorry for the poor baby's ears.

Definitely say something. It's affecting your evenings, every evening - just once in a while would be enough to drive you demented.

I needed this thread today, some of the replies have got me belly laughing.

Sorry OP!

I was all ready to think you were being unreasonable til I watched the clip 😂

That's mental. I think you should speak to her, but I have no idea what you would say!

@Confrontayshunme

The question is: what do I SAY?

"Pardon me, but your ululating is bothering our sleep?"
Or
"Hey, that weird noise has made my cat claw my thighs multiple times from upset! Knock it off!"

I just feel really bad because her DP left her with a three week old with reflux, six cats and a year old Jack Russell puppy at the beginning of lockdown, and she has had no interaction with any other parents or health visitors. I know she is just doing whatever it take to get by, but I am loopy from it.

Send her a link to a white noise machine? With a note attached saying 'This is the noise humans use to soothe a crying baby, please try it.'

Or buy one for yourself and hope it drowns out her mating call.

WTAF made me jump out of my chair..how do you even make that noise, deeply disturbing 😳

Not to laugh at your situation because it would do my head in, but thank you for this thread - I've not giggled like that in ages!!

Bloody hell! [wow]

This reminds me of when DS1 was a baby and we were at my MIL’s. My 6 year old nephew was there too. DS started screaming and wouldn’t stop, and DN hated the noise so he started screaming too. Grandma looks at her two caterwauling grandchildren and announces loudly and proudly “I can scream too!” So there’s an 8 month old baby, a 6 year old boy and a 57 year old woman all screeching along together. It’s just as well her house was fairly remote. I picked up DS and took him out for an extremely long walk and left the two other screechers to carry on.

Start learning the bagpipes and practice in the bedroom.

If she complains say you have Scottish ancestry and she's a bigot.

We do that in southern Africa but it's for celebrations, not to calm crying babies! We have nice calm lullabies for that.

I think the baby stops crying to give it’s mother a ‘what in the hell are you doing woman?’ look.

Op, I think she is getting back at you. If my neighbor practiced beginner violin, I would be ululating like a mad woman (if I could) .

Honestly, after hearing that video, I'd record her and report it to Social Services.

Laughing aside, that poor baby having that done to it multiple times a day I'm sorry, that's bloody horrific. Babies cry, it's their only way of communicating. That ululating noise is indefensible.

Record a typical day and night OP. Play it back to her - hopefully she'll be embarrassed and ashamed. What a loon! Poor terrified baby.

I feel a bit sorry for her with that update, I'd wonder is she managing ok. That noise at night is crazy though! Could you first genuinely ask how she's managing, then play dumb and say something like 'I dont mean to pry, but what is that really loud, unusual odd we can hear every evening/night' (hint, hint).

*odd=sound